My snark-shake brings all the boys to the yard...

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Guyon said:
I'll never forget that, as a small kid, I was playing outside and realized, all too late, I wasn't going to make it back to the house in time for a log drop. So I powered one out in our back yard, only to have one of my dad's bird dogs scarf it up like it was filet mignon. My point? Obviously, my crap is delicious. Can't say much about your cat's crap.
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Is there a way to "un-read" a post? Cause I'd like to get this one out of my mind.
 
Speaking of crap...

A bear and a rabbit are taking a dump in the woods next to each other. The bear asks the rabbit: "Do you have a problem with crap sticking to your fur?"
"No." Says the rabbit.





So the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit.
 
Thats funny i just seen this picture the other day....

bear_and_the_rabbit.jpg
 
GSO1962 said:
Didn't phones that require a stylus go out of style in the 1980's? About the time Don Johnson's Bren Ten went out of style....?
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I'm sensing a pattern there.

Chameleonbear said:
So, this is funny. I was just told that I'm going to hell. The person that told me that is TOTALLY committed to it too.
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I once had a tavern owner, whom I had known for years, tell me with a straight face that he had become convinced that I was not just a minion of the devil, but Satan himself. Oddly, he did not throw me out of the bar or stop serving me... he just gave me dirty looks all night while I smiled as sweetly as I could at him...

Our cats love to chew on fresh grasses, but mostly they just barf them up. I'm told this is fairly normal. Our dogs on the other hand, actually like vegetables and seem to digest them just fine. They go wild for fresh apple peels, too.
 
TMHunt said:
So, today when I got off of work I took our pup Sophie to the Vet for another round of vaccinations. While I was there, I asked him several questions. One of them I was reffering to one of the few things that the pup does that really bugs me which is the fact that she gets into the cats litterbox and likes to chew on a turd every now and then.:barf: Anyway, he tells me that is common with puppies and they make something that you can put in the animals food that makes shit taste terrible. :confused:............ I just looked at him strange and said. "Its shit, I can't imagine having to have to make it taste bad". So, I guess our new objective now is to make our cat Leo's crap taste bad...........:confused:.........Really don't know what to say about that.
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See if you can get the cat to lick murph.... That aftertaste in the cat's blind brown mullets will make the dog violently sick... He will never want cat mullet again....

He might get sick just looking at murph after that though.... But at least your problem will be solved.

Doc
 
Want, very much want. They got another one with a stylus for you stylus guys :D I dont ever use one so the whistle is a cool option.

[video=youtube;OwFrIiDiZjY]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OwFrIiDiZjY[/video]
 
Chameleonbear said:
So, this is funny. I was just told that I'm going to hell. The person that told me that is TOTALLY committed to it too.
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No, no....they just told you to,"Go to hell!"
And I'm sure they were TOTALLY committed to it. Lol :D
 
tradewater said:
My mother joined my dad this morning after being apart for five years. She passed with the same grace and dignity that she lived her life. Even with the progressive loss of mobility, speech and (toward the end) the ability to take food or water, she never complained once, always had a big smile and would laugh at my jokes. She was something else indeed. While all of us here are sad that we will never see that smile again, it is for selfish reasons and we are happy that she is finally beside my dad where she belongs. And all is right with the world.
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Sounds like she passed on a very healthy attitude to her son. My condolences, and hallelujahs as well.
iwouldhurtafly said:
Very sorry for your loss. However, your outlook speaks loads about your Mother, and you. Best wishes.
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Well said.
tradewater said:
Thanks for the kind words everyone. Much appreciated. Now snark onward!! Lets get the shit flying in all directions again!
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You are responsible for this...this...funniest snark thread. EVER.
TMHunt said:
So, today when I got off of work I took our pup Sophie to the Vet for another round of vaccinations. While I was there, I asked him several questions. One of them I was reffering to one of the few things that the pup does that really bugs me which is the fact that she gets into the cats litterbox and likes to chew on a turd every now and then.:barf: Anyway, he tells me that is common with puppies and they make something that you can put in the animals food that makes shit taste terrible. :confused:............ I just looked at him strange and said. "Its shit, I can't imagine having to have to make it taste bad". So, I guess our new objective now is to make our cat Leo's crap taste bad...........:confused:.........Really don't know what to say about that.
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Thanks for this, TMH (not even gonna try to guess your real name ;)). I have been laughing through all these posts, some of which I had to read whilst ROFL.

gentemanndvm said:
tbl, cat food has way higher fat/protein ratios than dog food because cats are obligate carnivores (I'm a veterinarian, so I know about 4 big words like that). they are meat eaters, even when it's just cat food. whereas dogs are omnivores (like us), so different fat/protein/carb ratios required. cats need their food to be like that. which doesn't detract at all from the fact that you are all correct, and pretty universally, cat poop in a litter box = dog Almond Roca.

tm, funny you say that re: the powder you mix in with the food to make poop taste bad. owners ask me about it all the time, and I say exactly the same thing you did, only less swearing b/c I'm trying to be all professional about it. my line goes more like: 'I'm not really convinced making poop taste bad is going to work. I'm pretty sure it tastes terrible already. but you can sure give it a shot and let me know how it works....'
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Even the clinical explanation caused some more ROFL. I'm actually glad I missed the whole day and got to read all the funny stuff in one go.

TBL said:
I could watch that GIF for hours...
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I just did.

Think I'm gonna etch my Machax before I strip. it. Don't read anything into that.


Had a Founder's Breakfast Stout last night, for an aperitif. Very good....and very chewy. The Thirsty Moose: 116 beers (±) on tap. Not nearly enough time.
 
tradewater said:
My mother joined my dad this morning after being apart for five years. She passed with the same grace and dignity that she lived her life. Even with the progressive loss of mobility, speech and (toward the end) the ability to take food or water, she never complained once, always had a big smile and would laugh at my jokes. She was something else indeed. While all of us here are sad that we will never see that smile again, it is for selfish reasons and we are happy that she is finally beside my dad where she belongs. And all is right with the world.
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Sincere condolences. Hopefully now that her time of pain has ceased, your healing can begin.

710 said:
Is BF working properly yet?
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nope - still a holding pattern - check back tomorrow.
 
IMG_20140224_220858.jpg


I don't have as many as Dex yet, and I don't have any San Mai (damn I need one!) but I think I have a decent Becker neck size collection growing.

James, I've been called the devil as well. Not too sure why as at the time I was actually semi-behaved. They were muttering something about even the devil can portray himself as an angel of light.
Johnny, I'm very used to being told to go to hell. I know the difference in tense.
 
Chameleonbear said:
James, I've been called the devil as well. Not too sure why as at the time I was actually semi-behaved. They were muttering something about even the devil can portray himself as an angel of light.
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You just can't please some people :p

In other news, I don't think this turned out quite the way Mr. Funnyman thought... from my FB page... (name redacted to protect the guilty)

XXXX said:
Do you make Men's knives, too?
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JamesTerrio said:
XXXX, if you like I could post some pics of the bushcraft knife challenge last spring where yours broke and mine didn't.
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Jackass :rolleyes:
 
I guess he A) thinks it's cute to take a dump on someone else's business page, and B) forgot about earning the nickname "Chip".
 
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