My wife is in much need of prayer...

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I, myself, do not have faith, but I was touched and hurt by your story, Mike. I sincerely wish you the best, for all it means.
 
Just finished a prayer for her before I posted this.God bless your wife and you.God hears all prayers and answers them.May he bless and keep you and your wife.
 
misque said:
They've commited to seeing me thru the healing process
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Mike-for me, thinking in terms of healing was a real stumbling block. I couldn't figure out why I wasn't doing better or "healing". Then I read a book that someone had sent us that really helped me to put it into perspective. The author's analogy was that you can heal from a broken leg, but a tragic loss is an amputation. You can learn to cope, reconcile, move on; whatever, but the loss is permanent. That seemed to take a lot of pressure off me to be "doing better" and allowed me to accept my grief for what it was. I'm sure that everyones experiences differ in this area, but if you feel that it would help email me and I would be happy to send you the book.

Jack
 
Jack,

You are oh so right in that this tragic loss is more of an amputation. Learning to cope, reconcile and move on are more like what I'm seeking. Healing is what I'm hoping for, but the three things you mentioned are a more realistic scenario of coming attractions.
Even though my grief is immense and the days ahead are threatening to be filled with emptiness, I know that the grief I feel now will not overtake and destroy me.
It has it's season and then it will fade till it no longer has center stage in my life.
And I will move on.
My life is obviously never going to be the same.
There is no replacing Sue.
Out of the six billion people on this planet, there is no one like her nor will there ever be again.
I will live the remainder of my days in this world alone or God will provide me with a loving woman who will help fill that empty Sue shaped hole in my heart and soul and allow me the joy of a loving relationship once again.

While all this is going on, God is sustaining me. And I will continue to pursue God and strengthen my bond with Him as He is my sole comfort right now.

I will cope, reconcile, move on and hopefully heal. But whatever the coming days, weeks or months have in store for me, I will be okay.

Thank you very much for this helpful insight and thanks to all for your kind condolances.

All my best,
Mike U.
 
Brother, My words will never be an adequate vehicle of expression of the sorrow you feel in your heart or the amount of sorrow I feel for you now. God is good and God is wise. Our ways are not His brother, We'll understand someday...but for now, My prayers are inbound...God bless you in these unbearable days. May He hold you close and comfort you....Jim
 
I have been my familys caregiver for years & know prayers help.You and your wife are now on my top ten list. Be strong for her & as someone above mentioned, optimism is contagious .


God loves you both & so do I !

Uncle Alan
 
Please accept my deepest condolences for your loss.

One of the blessing of our Christian faith is the certainty of what happens after we pass away. Not only for those who are no longer with us and are now in the presence of our God, but for those who remain here. For those who remain, we know there is hurt and sorrow, but there is also hope.

Our faith is a faith of hope. Hope that God is a God of love, joy, and peace. Hope of an afterlife, forgiveness, and second chances. It is in this hope that healing begins. The first step to healing after such a painful loss is accepting that there is hope, and trying to look at the future with hope.

It isn't easy. It takes an act of the will, something you do because you decide to do it. It also takes an act of faith, something you do inspite of what you see and feel because you trust that God will see you through the pain.

We will continue to pray for you and your family for peace and hope.
 
Mike

Prayers are being sent.. My family will be praying during your tough times ahead..We pray for a day when hope will make things better..


Mods could we move this to community forum so we can keep this a sticky???


Ren
 
Mike,

I had an awful time when I went through my divorce. Then one day I read a newspaper column that really helped. I no longer have the column, so I cannot quote it, but maybe a paraphrase will help.

The man who wrote the column had lost his son a while before. He was having a terrible time dealing with his grief, trying to just "hang on." Then one day, he couldn't hang on any longer, so he "let go." He found that once he let go, the ground was not as far down as he thought, and he began to heal.

Its metaphorical, of course, but it makes sense, and it really helped me. I hope that it might help you with your grief, too.

Your in-laws sound like great people.

I'm still praying for you.

Doug
 
I'm posting one last time in this thread to thank one and all for the amazing support and encouragement you've given to me.

The days are up and down for me to date but I'm feeling like things will be getting better.

I've decided that this weekend will be the big clean out of Sue's personal stuff and the HUGE stock of art supplies she's amassed over the years while she was a working artist. Sherri, her oldest daughter is the recipient of the bulk of the art supplies because she has her Mom's artistic spirit and appears to be following in her footsteps. Sandi, the youngest will be getting Sue's old book collection and lots of pics. Sue has some books dating back to the mid 1800's. :eek: The family has already been given pieces of Sue's artwork and now they can come and get some of Sue's personal affects. Objects reminding one of fond memories is a big thing with this family and there is plenty for everyone. Of course, I'll be keeping that which is most precious to me.

Sue's art, for the most part, reflects the joy which she always kept within her and which bubbled out from her like an Artesian Well. Her work has always brightened our house and you can feel her joy as you look at her work.

Our house is filled with Sue's art. Paintings on the walls, ceramics and pottery on the shelves. I even have several baking dishes she made which we have used for years. Of course, those will be staying home with me.

Sue was also a very good photographer. Her pics have been published in a book called "24 hours in the life of Ocala" and elsewhere but I cannot recall where at the moment. The pics in the 24 hours book are of me grinding out a blade blank. Well, part of me anyway. The pic shows my arms holding the blank and part of my big ol' belly. :D She has many hundreds of pictures all boxed up. It will take me HOURS to go thru them all.


I've always dearly loved my wife's paintings and ceramic work so what's hanging on the walls and on display will be staying here. The family understands and all is good.



I look at her work and can only smile. It brings back such good memories I can't help but smile. Yep, things are going to be alright and I will be okay too.


May God richly Bless you all,

Mike Ulakovits
 
I am a firm believer in prayer.
I have friends who are part of a prayer chain and I will pass along this
prayer request.
Your friend,
Mike
 
Mike,

While you're dealing with things I hope I never have to, it sounds like you've got a great perpective on life and your state of affairs. I'm sure it's beyond tough going through Sue's personal things and trying to decide what to do with the things she loved and used and created. It sounds like while it hurts to deal with these things, you've found a path that will help you and your family to get through this.

You're in my prayers.
 
Mike,
Thank you for sharing your love for Sue in this thread with us. Although I was very saddened by the turn of events at the last, I have also been inspired by your vast faith, incredible courage and deep passion. I believe that my new found perspective for my own family is due to this thread and has changed my view of my own marrige for the greater good thanks to you and Sue. As many of us do from time to time, I was taking my wife and children for granted in my daily routine prior to reading your heartfelt posts and subsequently praying for you all as other members have as well. You and Sue have made me realize my own short commings in this regard and I am greatful for it!

God Bless you and yours as I continue to pray for you and your family.

Best,
Anthony
 
OMG!! I am sorry to hear this!! I am sending you both lots of prayers and love. This totally saddens me. My heart hurts for you both!!
 
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