Official Notice regarding my daughter

Mark J

Mark J

Joined
Mar 15, 2001
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Official Notice: If you are a young man (i.e., punk) and plan on dating my daughter, you'd better pray to your god that you don't ever make her cry or hurt her feelings, or they will never find your body.

That is all.

- Mark (who owns a 70lb German Shepherd that loves her) :D
 

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Haha...my cousin has a handful of us lined up for when his now 12 y.o. daughter starts dating. Something like a more redneck version of the scene from Bad Boys II :D
 
I have 5 daughters, four of them are grown and gone. I had only one issue and that was a 14 y/o that came up to me-nose to nose- and told me he knew about me and he wanted me to know he was not scared of me. Well.....he was a liar. I told him that was fine as I now know I would not need to waste energy chasing him before I kicked his stupid ass. He ran all the way to his car where his dad was waiting. I was nice and offered each $20 to get out. They declined as I am a large, well armed man. I told each boyfriend that If they hurt my daughter I would not cut or shoot them...I would break their frikken back so each mornig when they try to get out of bed they would remember me and their mistake.

Good luck bro, your daughter is pretty and that will attract all kinds. If you have any issues..........you bring the chainsaw, I'll bring the beer!!
 
Mark J said:
Official Notice: If you are a young man (i.e., punk) and plan on dating my daughter, you'd better pray to your god that you don't ever make her cry or hurt her feelings, or they will never find your body.

That is all.

- Mark (who owns lots of knives and guns, and knows how to use them) :D
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As this is a tool centric forum, I will try to stay on topic. Though "knives and guns" would do in a pinch, I believe the proper tool for the "punk" application should be blunt and heavy, but fast. A tire iron, a pipe, etc, starting low and working up.
- Father of 4 girls.
 
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Thanks for the support and ideas everyone, not to mention the offers to help. :cool:

So far we've been safe, since she still thinks boys are gross. However, I know that won't last forever. In the best interest of my daughter, my son and I are doing all we can to personally reaffirm to her that boys/men are disgusting. "Dad, that's so gross" Music to my ears. :D

- Mark
 
Mark J said:
Official Notice: If you are a young man (i.e., punk) and plan on dating my daughter, you'd better pray to your god that you don't ever make her cry or hurt her feelings, or they will never find your body.
Click to expand...

No, no, no. You've got it all wrong. You hang the dried up, dessicated, mauled-mangled-mutilated corpse upside-down in the tree in your front yard. Aim a spotlight at it on Friday Saturday night. Sends a clear & convenient message to any other suitors. :D

~Chris
 
The first time I met my girlfriends father, he was sitting at his kitchen table disassembling a handgun. He just looked up, and said "Hey kid, are you here to pick up my daughter?" and I responded with an "Sweet, a Bernetta 9mm. I much more of a fan of the Colt 45, though it has been a while since I've had a chance to shoot. Which range do you go to?"

He looked half shocked, but ever since we've gotten along. (he even let me drive his boat and his truck!)

~Robert
 
orca8589 said:
No, no, no. You've got it all wrong. You hang the dried up, dessicated, mauled-mangled-mutilated corpse upside-down in the tree in your front yard. Aim a spotlight at it on Friday Saturday night. Sends a clear & convenient message to any other suitors. :D

~Chris
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There's that whole police thing, though. If I'm in jail, then I'll have to get someone else to watch her. :grumpy:

robertl said:
The first time I met my girlfriends father, he was sitting at his kitchen table disassembling a handgun. He just looked up, and said "Hey kid, are you here to pick up my daughter?" and I responded with an "Sweet, a Bernetta 9mm. I much more of a fan of the Colt 45, though it has been a while since I've had a chance to shoot. Which range do you go to?"

He looked half shocked, but ever since we've gotten along. (he even let me drive his boat and his truck!)

~Robert
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I can only hope for a SIL like that. The gun-cleaning-by-the-kitchen-table idea could be a pretty good approach to weeding them out. :thumbup:

- Mark
 
Mark J said:
There's that whole police thing, though. If I'm in jail, then I'll have to get someone else to watch her. :grumpy:
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Well, you could pick up a roadkill deer, trim it down, put clothes on it, and then hang it up. :D

~Chris
 
this thread reminds me of my buddy Mike. we met at a gym and became workout partners lifting iron. Mike's favorite pasttime was checking out the chicks in their little thongs who would stroll around the gym at which point he'd proceed to tell me the things he's like to do with each of them. I'd lost count of how many times I'd say "Mike, that girl is some guy's daughter!" at which he would scoff "what the hell do I care?".

Fast forward. Mike gets married and decides to start a family. First baby is a girl, which had him bummed because all he talked about was raising a son. Second child was actually two,(twins) BOTH girls. Mike was beside himself. I told him it was karma for all the sweet young things he'd defiled. he finally had his boy on the fourth try but the first girl is in her early teens now. and Mike's about to learn about payback:D. True story.
 
Posting your daughter's picture on the internet is certainly the best way to insure her safety. :p

Seriously, though, despite what you see on MTV, there are still some good young men out there who you would be happy for your daughter to date. I have two of them. I really can't imagine what it is like to raise a daughter in the world we live in.
 
She is a cutie:)..........Lucky for her she looks like her mom:D

Thank the Lord I don't have girls......The only advice I can offer is from the great Clint Eastwood......

"Make sure the body does'nt wash up on shore!"
 
orca8589 said:
No, no, no. You've got it all wrong. You hang the dried up, dessicated, mauled-mangled-mutilated corpse upside-down in the tree in your front yard. Aim a spotlight at it on Friday Saturday night. Sends a clear & convenient message to any other suitors. :D

~Chris
Click to expand...

YOU are the one who has it wrong. you hang the torso, the head, both arms and one leg all next to each other on a limb. Invite him in for steak and see what he says.
Brother.
 
I'm already teaching my boys (4 of them 3yrs-11yrs) how to properly treat a woman by how I treat their mom. I've talked a few times to the 11yr old, and he's still of the opinion that girls are not to be messed with, although he does have one "girlfriend" who has been after him since he was 3. He's still oblivious. My wife prays almost every day about their future wives, as they will be her daughters, as well. I pray for my boys that they end up as decent individuals, like Powernoodle's boys. Or, even like me.:D

That "rules for dating my daughter" spiel that went around a few years ago has it dead-on, though.
 
thegeek574 said:
YOU are the one who has it wrong. you hang the torso, the head, both arms and one leg all next to each other on a limb. Invite him in for steak and see what he says.
Brother.
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I bow to your superior wisdom, my friend. ;)

~Chris
 
Scott Free said:
Is that the same daughter from the Practical Tactical shooting thread?
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Yup, although I'm a little weirded out you noticed. Keeping my eye on you. ;)

It's good to see that you guys are trying to teach your sons to respect girls, even though girls can admittedly be a pain in the *ss. We also have a boy, so I see it from the other side as well.

- Mark
 
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