Keith, good on you for your concern, and for wanting to do something to help a friend. There's lots of ways to help, ranging from cutting her lawn, to babysitting the kids, and anything else that'll help ease her burden of having to deal with both parental roles.
Just as important is to get her lined up with a spouse support group where she can talk to other folks going through the same thing she is. No one can empathize or understand someone better than someone that's in the same boat. Her husband's unit would be a good place to check for something like that, as well as a good place to get info on community services activities that might be helpful or beneficial for her.
As a fellow who's worn the 1st Sgt hat a bit, I can tell you one thing your friend must guard against, and that's rumors. Rumors travel three times faster than legitimate news, seldom help anybody, and cause a great deal of anguish. She needs to discount "heard this from a friend of a friend" stuff, and stick with hard info from a verifiable source.
You've already taken the simplest, but most important step, letting her know she's got friends that care. United we stand.
Sarge