- Joined
- Dec 8, 2004
- Messages
- 4,812
BarberFobic's archery question made me think of this. For your amusement.
Guy I know accepted a transfer from the Big City to rural Michigan. So he moves the family out to this lightly populated area. Just his home and maybe a few more along his street. Nice and quiet, with woods in the back.
They'd been in the house only a couple days. He wakes up, strolls down to the kitchen, and pours himself a big cup of coffee. As he sips the coffee, he glances out the window and sees this enormous buck in the yard. The animal, rack of antlers and all, is standing in the back yard sniffing the air.
"Honey," he yells out to his wife. "Come down here; you gotta see this!" His wife is a total animal nut. Loves animals of all kinds, and freaks out when someone steps on an ant. All God's critters need love. It's amazing she eats meat.
"What?!" she screams down. "I'm busy!"
"Hurry, hurry," he says urgently, watching the buck flick his tail and go back to sniffing around the base of a tree.
"Okay," she says. What a nice surprise this will be for her. "Give me a damn minute." A buck!
He takes another sip of coffee, and realizes what a little kid the whole incident is making him. A slight motion catches his eye.
He looks to the right, and sees his neighbor slowly open his kitchen window. "Cool," he thinks, his neighbor has spotted the buck too. Maybe he'll chuck an apple out for him. Heck, maybe he does this all the time, and buck is a regular here. How cool would that be?
Suddenly, an arrow zings out of the kitchen window. BAM! Hits the buck right in the heart. The animal staggers a step, and collapses instantly. Just about dropping his coffee, he looks, and sees his neighbor stick his head out the window, clutching a compound in one hand. Kill confirmed.
"All right," his wife yells down, "I'm coming." He hears her feet on the steps, and in total panic says "Uh... uh... never mind! It was a bird... but he flew away... go back to bed!" He couldn't imagine the stroke she'd have seeing *that.*
She cusses him out and goes back to bed. He got to watch his neighbor drag the buck around the back of his house, thinking that he was now quite a long ways from the city.
Guy I know accepted a transfer from the Big City to rural Michigan. So he moves the family out to this lightly populated area. Just his home and maybe a few more along his street. Nice and quiet, with woods in the back.
They'd been in the house only a couple days. He wakes up, strolls down to the kitchen, and pours himself a big cup of coffee. As he sips the coffee, he glances out the window and sees this enormous buck in the yard. The animal, rack of antlers and all, is standing in the back yard sniffing the air.
"Honey," he yells out to his wife. "Come down here; you gotta see this!" His wife is a total animal nut. Loves animals of all kinds, and freaks out when someone steps on an ant. All God's critters need love. It's amazing she eats meat.
"What?!" she screams down. "I'm busy!"
"Hurry, hurry," he says urgently, watching the buck flick his tail and go back to sniffing around the base of a tree.
"Okay," she says. What a nice surprise this will be for her. "Give me a damn minute." A buck!
He takes another sip of coffee, and realizes what a little kid the whole incident is making him. A slight motion catches his eye.
He looks to the right, and sees his neighbor slowly open his kitchen window. "Cool," he thinks, his neighbor has spotted the buck too. Maybe he'll chuck an apple out for him. Heck, maybe he does this all the time, and buck is a regular here. How cool would that be?
Suddenly, an arrow zings out of the kitchen window. BAM! Hits the buck right in the heart. The animal staggers a step, and collapses instantly. Just about dropping his coffee, he looks, and sees his neighbor stick his head out the window, clutching a compound in one hand. Kill confirmed.
"All right," his wife yells down, "I'm coming." He hears her feet on the steps, and in total panic says "Uh... uh... never mind! It was a bird... but he flew away... go back to bed!" He couldn't imagine the stroke she'd have seeing *that.*
She cusses him out and goes back to bed. He got to watch his neighbor drag the buck around the back of his house, thinking that he was now quite a long ways from the city.
