Special Needs Kids

Rob Kelly

Rob Kelly

Joined
Apr 21, 2003
Messages
414
Just speaking for myself here

But I really must say that having a special needs kid has huge rewards

You folks with "normal" often ask " but how do you do it?"

Well here's the tip

We don't know any differant

Raelene and I have only Jesse and all the things we have been through are just what we have to deal with as parents

Jesse has a mild developmental delay, which really just means that he is behind in some speech, motor and cognitive areas

He is still a very happy and affectionate kid, loves to help and play outside

But despite some little difficulties small milestones are times of great joy and pride

What others take for granted in childhood development we are very proud of

And also as a parent of a special needs kid boy do you get protective

Some folks are just plain dumb

Waiting in line at the bank and some older guy smiles and says whats your name to Jesse

Now Jesse looks at me and turns away from the old man

Shy you may think

a bit rude to you may think

The old guy says what's HIS problem

Dont he talk or something

I glare at the old guy and just say

Nope we just tell him not to talk to strangers

Then I had to deal with jesse being upset cause the old guy suggested there was something wrong with him

I think Jesse has taught me more about life than anyone or anything else

Rob
 
Rob,

I know exactly what you mean. We have a 6 yr. old boy, who is an only, who just happened to be born with Down syndrome. We take great pride in his achievements as well, knowing how difficult it is for him sometimes. The best of luck to you and yours in the future.

Tom
 
Thanks Tom

You know I prefer to think of them as special gifts rather than special needs kids

Makes you look at everything from a whole new perspective

Mebbe the big guy upstairs is trying to show us something ???

Rob
 
Rob,

Welcome to BF.

Not to compare a precious child to a pet, but there are some parallels.

The three year old dog I have came out of the pound with parvo at 7 1/2 weeks of age.

He was diagnosed the day after I adopted him and he went through 2 months of treatment that was quite extensive the first two weeks. At the beginning I was told by my vet that he had about a 20% chance of survival that would increase dramatically after the first 4 or 5 days if he made it. Someone had to stay with him round the clock the first 3 weeks to watch for problems (especially seizures).

Caring for this dog, seeing him progress to a healthy and strong 120 lb adult has been an experience that I would do over again in a heartbeat. The experience with your son, must be one that creates a feeling at least 10 fold of mine. I know it has made me a better person.

May God continue to bless you and your family.
 
I work in a social work agency that focuses on people with developmental disabalities. It has opened my eyes in many ways. You really realize that lots of "normal" people are lacking in more areas than people with disabilities. Such as lacking compassion, understanding, kindness, and loving hearts.
 
" Bastid"
Dedication beyond the call is noble beyond all boundries

Kindof sorts the "folks" from the nuffies

"Paul Davidson"
I drop Jesse off at school every day and these kids have social graces that alot of folks would never be even able to attain

No disrespect but I have found these"special needs" kids to be the nicest most polite sensitive kids ever

"Andrew Lynch"

Thank you

To Ren The Devil's Trailboss

A huge thank you

I wish that you were able to post at this time but your post about your son

has made me realize that ther are so many folks in so many places that are "SPECIAL PARENTS"

not that I consider myself one but we get by

Raelene and I are just doing what we can to make our boy Jesse have the best possible life

The toll on a marriage can be immense

Boy oh boy have we had our bumps

We have focused on Jesse and kinda lost sight of us for a while but it has all been a learning process

Just to see him so happy and comfortable in life and his interactions with folks is a huge reward

Once my Gold Membership gets through I will post a pic if folks are interested????

Thanks again to all and I know that GOD has blessed me

Rob from Oz
 
An ex-girlfriend, the one that got away *sigh*, and her husband were parents of a Down Syndrome medically fragile boy. Sammy lasted a couple of years but died due to complications. Out of the devastaion and grief blossomed good. Through her experience she found there were no daycares or any real help for parents and families of like children and started a daycare environment for special needs and medically fragile kids including resources to aid the families. She is a good person whom I still adore no end though we are rarely in contact.

http://www.sammyshouse.org/about.htm
(There is also a video link on the following)
http://www.news8austin.com/content/your_news/default.asp?ArID=114060

This is an excerpt from an email which I had her use for fundraisng efforts after I read it. I think it explains itself.
"Our commitment to improving the lives of the children we serve is intense and can be heartbreaking. Let me tell you about our kids. Some don't have legs, or ears. Some aren't supposed to walk, but they do. Some have bigger and stronger souls than you and I after a lifetime of experience. I am in awe of them. They are incredible creatures. They endure pain and still find life enjoyable. Their spirit in the face of hardship inspires us all to keep coming back and everyday each of us feels good about the things that are happening here."
Beautiful woman. Y'all have another great day.
 
I've always believed that the best part of people is the part that is hidden from the general public. If you watch people long enough you will get to see glimpses into their "human" side that they typically keep secreted away. It's usually the part that we might consider "goofy," "awkward," "sensitive," etc... Those qualities are seen as weaknesses to the general public. I'm not saying that we are insincere in our day-to-day conduct. I just believe that we project an image of ourselves that we want others to see. Equally so, we hide aspects of our personality, usually our perceived vulnerabilities, that we consider less acceptable. As a result we get a distilled image of each other but not the full personality. Unfortunately, the best parts are sometimes the parts that are hidden away.

People who have loved ones with special needs get to see the true nature of these people each and every day. There are no pretenses with them. As a result, people like Rob begin to realize how it is the hidden qualities that make people special. It must be a real blessing to be around someone who is 100% true to himself every day. And they do it with such an amazing grace. Not only should it teach us why they are truly special, but it should remind us of our own humanity. That's what makes us special too. It's an awesome opportunity to have such an open and loving relationship with another. It's a gift. Enjoy it. :)
 
Rob Kelly,

My post must have been confusing. You seemed to have taken it exactly opposite of what I intended to say.

Paul
 
I've worked in special ed. for two years and a while back someone said to me that they felt sorry for "those kids," that it must be so hard for them.

Until they said that, that idea had never crossed my mind. Unless they are surrounded by people who make them feel inadequate, they just know and love the person that they are.

I'm glad you posted this, we're all on a spectrum of ability and we need to take the time out to recognize our own "diasbilities" or "delays."

Nitin
 
Paul, I think Rob was just clarifying and verifying your comment. :) I must admit, as my 'normal' daughter grows into a young teen, I am seeing that more of the manner lessons I thought were ignored, are surfacing. Not only hers, but those of her peers. I am especially proud of her acceptance of the fact that all people are different, even all blonds.
If I had one wish for the world it would be 'compassion'. All the rest would fall into place.
 
Paul

Sorry if my post may have seemed to contradict yours

I was just expounding on the idea of these special kids having a greater sense of gracious behaviour

The "no disrespect' was for all the "normal' folks

To all folks a big thank you for all the positive comments

Rob
 
Sorry Rob Kelly. I guess I am the one that misunderstood. That's what I get for trying to post right after I get home from work. I should let my brain rest a while first. ;)

Paul
 
I know we are easing up on the kid Lone Wolf, but I sure hopes he reads this thread.
 
Perhaps i can contribute my $.02 worth: i am vision impaired (~10% of eyesight remaining at birth, a side effect of being an albino) so i'm not mentally but rather physically handicapped compared to the rest of you - i'm just fortunate enough i didn't get tossed up in one of those "special" schools where kids with similar disabilities as mine did - what i mean, if you treat somebody who may be handicapped in some way as a true defect that's all you're going to get out of them; if you give them a chance to get as far as they can people will always surprise you.

The attitude is the key, i can't get driver's license, stupid customs duties and limited employment potential for vision impaired folks make knife collecting harder and some other things in life suck big time (not as easy to go out without car) but hey, at least i had the chance to go as far as i could (finished "normal" grade school, high school and am few pages of thesis from finishing with university). Give your child the chance to do as much with his life as he can and i'm sure you'll be greatly rewarded (in non-material sense).
 
After reading this I realise I owe all of you an apology.I am sorry for my past comments on people with disabilitys. Best of luck to you and yours.

Sincerely,
Lone Wolf.
 
I worked two summers in college as a day camp counselor for special needs kids, ages 5-21. I always got the younger groups, and boy, those kids can really get to you. In a good way, I mean. I got so attached to some of them. There is one little girl (now 17) who still comes around to visit me when I'm working in the store. I see some of the others around town, but only Shayna really remembers me now since that was about seven years ago. She has Downs Sydrome and she is the happiest, most pleasant girl I know. She always greets me with a big hug and smile and then insists on going back to play with my dog, who always comes to work with me.

I love all young children, but I have a thing for Downs Syndrome kids. They always seem so happy and kind.

~ashes
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top