sticks and stones

F

foster

Joined
Jul 29, 2000
Messages
14
Some guy has been giving my daughter a really hard time. A couple of times she has come home crying and that drives any red blooded american dad crazy.

One night at the hosptital while I was wheeling one of our more unfortunate clients to the morgue I was daydreaming about Infi steel and my battle mistress.

When I opened the cooler There in a red biohazard bag was some poor guy's leg. The result of an amputation earlier in the day.

So I'm thinking why don't I just take that bag home and let that leg set in the creek out back for a couple of days and get ripe. Then I'll take it to that guys house some night and take my Battle Mistress and spike that smelly leg right to the side of the car parked in his drive way with a little note like "your next billy!!"

But my wife says it is normal for 4th graders to call each other names, and we should probably just talk to his teacher.

 
Don't we have some kind of "Blind-Side Set-Up Story of the Month" contest Foster could enter? I'm betting he wins a knife!

ROFLMAO!
 
Put that in a movie....have Bruce Willis be the dad. Or maybe somebody weird like Gary Oldman.
 
Can I have the leg? Will you mail it to me?

I could hook electrodes to it and make it hop around the yard! Man that would be cool!

What other parts can you get me?

Seriously though, Foster's post had my wife and I rolling on the floor....that's some funny sick stuff.

 
Man, I am glad I do not have to take "Packages" to the morgue anymore.
"If they stand up push them back down, but
if they stand up and walk....haul ass!!!"


 
You know, I was looking at the remote control electric hand in the Sportsman's Guide catalog -- you know, the one that will flip the finger by wireless remote control -- and I was wondering if there was a use for it. Suddenly I have this weird feeling that most of the people on this thread most definitely COULD/WOULD make use of it...
biggrin.gif


 
You know what? I just realized that you'd be leaving your Battle Mistress behind!

I wasn't sure if that was a good idea or not, but NOW I'm convinced that it is definitely a bad idea.

(Maybe you should just make a starter hole with your BM then leave a different knife behind)
 
Thank you all for appreciating the fact that I was only playing around and that this was my attempt at humor.

I had wished I could have taken that post back after hitting the send key for fear of being branded a "wretched little man". I am delighted that I was not greeted by tons of posts chastising me for stalking 4th graders with aysemetrical edged epoxy coated infi steel.

In reality that would certainly get an enemy's attention. Though I don't know wich is more disturbing. The leg, or the Battle Mistress stuck in the side of your minivan.

Yours in Thermo Nuclear Revenge.....
The wretched little man.....
foster
 
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