The Absolute FIRST "How To Defend Yourself Using A Leatherman Micra" Webpage is HERE!

Vampire Gerbil

Gone, but not forgotten. RIP Dave
Platinum Member
Sep 21, 1999
I just got my Leatherman Micra today and asked my wife to give it back for 10 minutes to illustrate the necessary measures needed to master the complicated art of using this extremely complicated and scary weapon!

The webpage is in its infantile stage at this time, but the basics are there.

All that is needed is approximately 7 years of training to master the technique shown.

If interested, take a look at:

And remember to use this knowledge ONLY for the benefit of mankind.

Tongue firmly planted in cheek, I remain,
Vampire Gerbil

Vampire Gerbil: similar to a domestic gerbil, except for the odd accent and little black cape.

I had a lousy day today but two good things happened at the end of the day:

1) I found out that my Busse #9 shipped.

2) I read your post, checked out your web site and got a great laugh. Thanks so much.

[This message has been edited by Don G (edited 23 September 1999).]
I guess I don't need that new Busse Basic Model 7 now.

I should probably try to trade it for a micra!

Great site! Loved the pics. Especially the one of the gent holding the micra. I wouldn't mess with that guy!


Giggle, teehehehe, sniggle, snork, snarf, wheeze! (pat myself on the back so coffee doesn't go into sinus cavities). Whew!

Fireprez, er Vampire Gerbil, thanks!
Using a micra for self defense might be a really good idea.

Think of it. Defending yourself with a blade that size would scare you so bad that your whole body would shake violently, enough perhaps to cause sort of a reciprocating saw effect. Controlled properly, it might be very effective.

I don't want my children fed or clothed by the state, but I would prefer THAT to their being educated by the state.
Vamp, you could probably be holding an edged toothpick and I'd leave you alone. Wait a minute, that's pretty much what the micra is!
Who did your eyebrows?


The Browning High Power looks good! I see it is old enough to have the "right" hammer!

Wow. I am scared to even look at my keychain after that. I am packing serious lethal force and didn't even notice.

PS Don't let any California legislators see that webpage...

Clay Fleischer
AKTI Member A000847

Specialization is for insects.
<img src="" height="50" width="50">

"A knifeless man is a lifeless man"
-Nordic proverb


Your pictures are truly amazing
How do you get people to take them? The mind reels.

Your handle is now my favorite. I can't help but laugh every time I see it.

"A knifeless man is a lifeless man"
-Nordic proverb

You made beer fly out of my nose and onto my monitor screen!! I think I fried my keyboard too!! Damn that was FUNNY!!!
Best 6.78$ i have spent recently.

Dances with lemmings

VG,you are seriously twisted!That is hilarious!

never a dull moment
After thinking about I realized Firep... ummm... Vampire Gerbil came up with the best answer for those Best kife for a... posts
VG that really made my day!
Will you be giving classes or perhaps you should make tapes?
Do you do this professionally?
Maybe you should!

If it's stupid but works, then it isn't stupid.

In case you didn't realize it, I updated the page. I guess you would've seen that post by now, huh?
I didn't wanna seem rude by not responding to your posts, so here goes, in order

Don G - I sure hope that today was better than yesterday! Didja get your Busse?

By the way, what was so funny about my page? (You're welcome)

KodiakPA - Don't be silly and trade your Busse in for a Micra. Trade it in for A THOUSAND Micras!! They're C H E A P ! ! !

The "gent" in the pics has some serious issues that need to be worked out. He ain't so hard to mess with, so long as you give him a beer or 30.

Bob Irons - WHAT THE HECK IS SO FUNNY? (heh heh)

Uncle Bill - I tried out your theory but accidentally held the Micra in the wrong position. I removed one of my spleens. Therefore, your idea is sound!

Stray - Why would you leave me alone? I'm such a warm and loving DO have beer, don't you?
As for my eyebrows..... I did 'em myself with the Micra's tweezers!!! DUH!

MNH - Yep, the Hi-Power's about 8 years old. Didn't know they came out with a new hammer style. This weapon's perfect for me, with the exception that I prefer a stronger round... then again, that's why the Good Lord created DoubleTaps, right?

James Mattis - Which nasty thing are you referring to? Me or the Micra? I KNOW that I ain't allowed in most public buildings, but that's due to a "dangerous animal" statute that I feel is horribly outdated.
(Growl, snarl, etc.)
My Micra is allowed through all the time, provided it doesn't ask for a cane.

CD Fleischer - USe the knowledge well, my son. I emailed the California Legislature's website and told 'em not to look at the Micra Site.
We're safe.

David Williams - You'll have to settle for

Ralf - You'll have to settle for
(I ain't upset, just didn't wanna fall into a rut)

David Williams - Back so soon? lol
As for my "amazing pictures"..... I ask my lovely wife and daughters to assist me. They're not too hesitant anymore, especially after I got out of my vivisectionist phase. As for my handle, I have a feeling that me and you get the same visuals... lol.... what drugs did YOU do back in the 70's?

Mr G - Spewing beer out one's own nostrils is the first sign of alcohol abuse. Kindly remember to swallow before clicking in the future.

Franmeister - Actually, $6.78 is for the Micra. Viewing my website cost $75... per visit.
Come back often!

Storyville - I am not a SEAL.... more of a walrus with a mannatee's butt. As for Austin Powers, isn't that the guy who shags?
(I'm serious about that! I'm drawing a blank over here!!!!)

(Twisted, yes.... in a looped kinda way)

David Williams - YOU AGAIN?!?!?!?!?!?

Misque - Glad to make your day... as I previously said, use the power wisely, my son.
Actually a tape sounds like a pretty cool idea!!! I'd ask Paladin Press to distribute it and enlighten the WORLD! LMAO!!!
I do NOTHING professionally..... that'd take the fun outta it.... also put the stress INTO it!

Well, I'm gonna stop cuz my wife just came by with my nightly IV Drip of Thorazine/Lithium/Foster'sLager/Nyquil

I'm gonna REALLY wake up NOW!!!!!

Vampire Gerbil: similar to a domestic gerbil, except for the odd accent and little black cape.