What a [email protected]#$ing day... Warning: terrible language. Rated R.

Discussion in 'Fletcher Knives' started by Fletcher Knives, Jul 30, 2011.

  1. Fletcher Knives

    Fletcher Knives STEEL BREATHING BLADE MAESTRO Moderator

    Aug 30, 2007
    So I get a phonecall Thursday morning. My very good friend's wife has just died. Naturally, I immediately drop everything, pack a backpack, jump in the truck, and head to Memphis. Living in Atlanta, that's a little more than a 440 mile trip. I get there Thursday night. Spend as much time with my friend as I can. Unfortunately, my wife is going to be coming in on a flight in Atlanta on Sunday morning (tomorrow morning), so I can't stay for the funeral service.

    This morning, I get back in the truck to head home. I'm almost to Chattanooga, about 140 miles from home, barrelling through the mountains.

    All of a sudden, FUCKING BOOOOOOOM!!!, bang bang bang, rattle rattle rattle rattle rattle! With the first boom, the oil pressure went to absolute zero, the "service engine" light started flashing like a drunk biker woman at a harley rally, and the truck grindingly comes to a stop.

    My eyes the size of saucers, I said, "what the fuck was that!" I pop the hood and look at the motor. Nothing is visually wrong. I climb down under the truck looking for oil or something to be gushing out... nothing. I go back to my tool box and fetch a rag. yank the dipstick out and smoke starts billowing out of the damn dipstick hole! I look at the dipstick and it's black. I wipe it off, put it back in the hole, and check it again. Other than the smoke clinging to it as I pull the stick out, it's bone dry. WHAT THE HELL HAS HAPPENED HERE?!!

    Before EVERY SINGLE trip, I check the oil in my truck and make sure it's good to go. If need be, I top it off or have it changed. This time was no exception. Everything was fine when I left.

    Back to the truck. I go back to the toolbox and get out my big ass jug of oil and dump the whole thing in there. As I do, smoke is again billowing out of the fill spout. Nothing registers on the dipstick. ????????? I get back in the cab and twist the key. The motor starts wrenching and dancing around like a cat in the washing machine and it's knocking and banging like crazy before it promptly dies. At this point it's obvious to me that the engine is fee-fie-foe-FUCKED. No need for a professional diagnosis.

    At this point, I look at where I am, the middle of the mountains, just outside Chattanooga and there's nothing around. I put the plan into action. My insurance gives me roadside assistance and a tow to anywhere within 15 miles. I call my the insurance and get the tow truck on the way. I tell them, "find me the nearest Ford dealership to my current location. That's where I want my truck to go." The girl says, "Got it. There's one 11 miles away from you." The tow truck guy shows up and we get hauling ass. We make it to the place just as they're closing the doors. The time is 6:40.

    I immediately call Enterprise Rent-a-car and say, "I need a car right now." The girl says, "ok. Where are you?" I tell her my location. She says, "well, unfortunately, the branch close to you is closed already. Your only hope is to get to the airport. Would you like me to book you a car there?" I say, "yes please." She says, "ok. You have to get there by 7PM." I look at my watch and it says "6:46PM". I yell to the tow truck guy, "where is the airport?" He says, "about 20 minutes away." I tell the girl, "book it! I gotta run!!!." I run inside the dealership as a guy is trying to lock the door and grab the nearest business card I see and run back out. I grab the tow truck guy and say, "I'll give you $50 cash if you can get me there by 7." He says, "deal."

    We both jump in the tow truck and he slams the gas. He's kicking that trucks ass like a madman and has clearly done a few laps around the Indy 500. Somehow, we make it to the airport at 7:01!! I throw the cash at him as I'm launching out the door. I run into the airport terminal and find the rental car place. Right before this kid is about to pull the stupid gate down I say, "please let me pick up my car. I have a reservation." He looks at me for a second and says, "not a problem." Kid helps me out and snatches a car around for me. Then the news comes.

    Apparently, because I'm renting a car from an airport, I can .... wait for it......... ONLY RETURN IT BACK TO A FUCKING AIRPORT!!!! Atlanta International isn't exactly right down the street!!! Then, in a spilt second I think, I have to go there anyways to pick up my wife. I'll just drop it off then. WAIT A MINUTE!! If I do that, then how the sam-damn-hell are we supposed to get home? I then realize, I get to make, not one, BUT TWO trips to the airport tomorrow. YAY!!!!!!! That won't cost me an arm and a leg in gas! <------- heavy sarcasm. Then the kid says, "alright sir, that'll be one hundred and thirty something dollars." WHAAAAAAAT!!!!!! I need the car for one night!! What the hell!!!! I've rented cars for the entire weekend and it was only like $30 a day! I go over it with him several times until I feel confident that there's no way around it. I'm about to dish out over a bill just to rent a car and get home.

    Finally, though I should have been home at about 5PM, I straggle my worn out, 10PM ass in the house a little while ago. I'm beat, my truck is screwed, still have to deal with the rental car bullshit, spent butloads of money just to get home, bla bla bla.

    What a fucking day.
     
  2. euroross

    euroross Gold Member Gold Member

    May 19, 2008
    Damn! I really dont know what else to say. Damn.
     
  3. wardleather

    wardleather

    156
    Mar 8, 2010
    ...all the while in the background you hear this faint song playing on the half-ass one speaker radio..."sounds like life my friend..."
     
  4. euroross

    euroross Gold Member Gold Member

    May 19, 2008
    If you drink....you need one.
     
  5. HAKnPocket

    HAKnPocket

    Mar 2, 2008
    Damn sorry to hear about your friend's wife. The travel issues while a huge pain in the rear don't trump the fact that you dropped everything to support your friend. I know its not much but if you need anything let me know.
     
  6. m. wohlwend

    m. wohlwend Banned BANNED

    Apr 21, 2007
    Wow! What a rough day! Thoughts out to you.....
     
  7. zachtateknives

    zachtateknives

    382
    May 4, 2010
    If he doesn't frink, he needs one.
    If he drinks, he needs six.
     
  8. BloodGroove4570

    BloodGroove4570

    Jul 25, 2010
    Hey bud sorry to hear of your loss,
    and the rest just sucks AZZ, have a drink, sounds like you can use one.
    The rest will just work its self out
    Hang in there bro.....
     
  9. mqqn

    mqqn Gold Member Gold Member

    Nov 12, 2009
    My condolences for your friends wife - sad indeed.

    I recently returned from Europe only to find my flight from Chicago to my home was canceled -

    It cost my company $459 for me to drive a Chevy Cruse from Chicago to Peoria - a 2 hour drive (the way I drive...).

    Yea - they have you by the cahones, and they squeeze.

    I hope your truck is not in bad shape - todays engines run very hot, and smoke/steam from the crankcase is not necessarily a sign of catastrophic damage.

    best of luck -

    mqqn
     
  10. jaxs

    jaxs

    335
    Jun 8, 2011
    Deepest condolences to you and your friend..
    But look on the bright side, you've been through the shits and back - things can only look brighter!
     
  11. The Giver

    The Giver

    39
    Dec 13, 2010
    Damn Dylan my deepest condolences to your friend and his family. When Murphy piles it on he sure the hell did. Sorry buddy.
     
  12. bacustomknives

    bacustomknives FULL THROTTLE / FULLTIME KNIFE MAKER

    Sep 3, 2008
    No doubt bro , one fucked up day!!! I feel for ya
     
  13. Riverwarrior

    Riverwarrior

    Sep 17, 2010
    Very sorry to hear of your friend's wife passing. That really sucks ass about your truck ordeal. I just had a drink for ya brother! Keep us posted.
     
  14. caine

    caine

    Nov 9, 2003
    Well if it makes you feel better. Yesterday I sold my beloved Colt gold cup that ive had since 2000 for 500 to make rent. :(
     
  15. Liveitloud

    Liveitloud

    Jul 1, 2006
    DITTO what a f'd up mess. Sorry about your friend and your vehicle. Did it throw a rod or something?
     
  16. Bufford

    Bufford Gold Member Gold Member

    Mar 13, 2006
    Sending my condolences for the loss of your friend, some days in life are like that. Pour back a big glass of your favorite vise.
     
  17. Magnaminous_G

    Magnaminous_G

    Jul 13, 2011
    What a day you had, brother. Your engine seized; that truck is dead. No idea what caused it, but it's seized. And then paying out the wazoo for crap that wasn't even supposed to happen. Jeesh... Goes to show that no good deed goes unpunished, right? You were just trying to be there for your friend, and then all that happened. Almost gotta laugh, right? :-/

    Hope it all worked out; give us the aftermath, brother. And condolences for your friend and his loss.

    - Mag
     
  18. chainring

    chainring Gold Member Gold Member

    Jul 20, 2008
    Sounds like a bad day. On the other hand, the loss your friend has suffered kinda puts it into perspective. Bad as things get sometimes, they can always get worse. Sometimes the old trite saying, "Count your blessings" is applicable. Of course, when reminded of that during some period of duress, my uncle had a response that we've all laughed about ever since. When told to "count his blessings" he responded with "count your OWN damn blessings!" :) I don't think he was joking...
     
  19. stephenthesuave

    stephenthesuave

    240
    Jun 27, 2011
    Rental cars get stupid expensive when you start driving them across state lines and/or returning them to a different place than you picked it up from.

    This is one of those situations you will feel better about in time. You did the right thing by going to see your friend (which says a lot about your character, I know people who wouldn't spend the gas money to console a relative). Here's hoping the truck repair is cheap. Everything else is just the cost of being a friend.
     
  20. Arakiel

    Arakiel

    738
    Jun 14, 2010
    The good news: you're a great storyteller. The bad news: you're the main character in a tragedy. Thanks for adding just enough comic relief in the telling that I was spared your pain.
    PS I'm a mechanic so if you ask me what happened to your engine, and how much it will cost to get your truck back on the road, I'll do you a favor and change the subject by telling you jokes instead of answering.
     
    Last edited: Jul 31, 2011

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