When you hit an obstacle?

psy-ops

psy-ops

Joined
Sep 27, 1999
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Is it better to express your feelings and be depressed or suppress any emotional expression?

With others and Alone should there be differences?

This is when you have time to. If it is an immediate emergency I think we would all agree that emotional suppression is absolutely necessary.
 
When you are alone for god sake let it out!
Why would you want to carry more baggage than what you already have eg. survivor guilt or Post Traumatic Stress. If you can, scream, vent let it all go....

Now if you are in a group, hold back, let your rationale guide you as to when and who you can confide these things to. If you are the designate for the group then you just have to suck it up and push on.
 
I would imagine that especially if you are alone in the bush for an unknown amount of time, that you should either suppress your feelings, or get over them quickly. When completely alone, you have one of two choices: fall apart, or get your butt up.

When you are with several people in the bush, you have a bit more opportunity to become angry or depressed depending on how you get along with your company, but nonetheless, I wouldn't want to be the guy who breaks down in the middle of a long campout or backpacking trip.

When I was on my Philmont backpacking trips in scouts, we always had the one "looney" in the group each year that we would go. Either one person claimed that one day they couldn't take it anymore, or the next day they wanted to quit and go home. All that did was make them look like quiters, and that isn't going to fix anything in the bush.

I believe that people nowadays feel that they have the "opportunity" to be lazy or depressed (I know sometimes this can't be helped, but I'm talking about the majority of people) since there is only work, computer, eat, sleep. Very simple routine with almost no real work involved. Now go back 100 to 200 years ago, and you have a whole other story. People didn't have time to be depressed unless it was during war times, but besides that there were several chores and laboring activites which needed to be done to survive. It's all about survival. We (me and you guys) could go out in the bush and the only thing we'd be depressed about is forgetting the tobasco sauce!!! Now take somebody that likes that modern routine and they are going to go crazy when there isn't a plug outlet to be seen. I'm done ranting, hope this helps, J.
 
all depends on your definition of obstacle...after a couple of years working full time in ems my definition of emergency has changed alot, as has my reaction to it....lifes like Thanksgiving leftovers..sometimes you got to cook it and sometimes you got to chill it...Knowing when to do what comes only with experience...experience of which I still need alot of.
 
I recently read a very good article in Backpacker magazine on panic. Some experts said that they considered it to be the number one cause of backcountry accidents and death. The main part of the advice in coping with panic was to "open a can of calm". Sit down and assess the situation before doing something rash. To me this makes a lot of sense. It is how I handle emergency situations. People around me who don't react this way are first amazed and can't understand how I can remain calm. But then I am the "go-to-guy" when a finger is slashed, artery cut, bone broken or other emergency occurs. IMHO, there is plenty of time to go all wobbly kneed and heart pounding once a situation has been delt with and under control.

Here is a snippet of the article, though the full article is worth the price of the issue for just this article:

http://www.backpacker.com/gear/200

Codger
 
Depends.

Depends on the obstacle, depends on the crowd, etc.
If I'm in a position where I'm tempted to "lose it" it's usually due to other people.
For instance int he above scenario of the peson breaking down on a long camp and wanting to quit. That would piss me off, and considering the cirsumstances, I'd probably just go off on them because now I have to abandon my camp/vacation to cater to them.

Now if it was an emergency, I tend to stay fairly calm. I usually suck it up and do what has/can be done, and then have my melt down alone after it's over.

Make no mistake, having a meltdown is healthy and necessary. What gets people in trouble is when they have their meltdown.
 
personally, when i am feeling down, i just get over it. i distract myself with something, and get my mind off of it. in a survival situation, this would be a pile of chores that need doing. in a normal day to day setting, i sit down and whittle on a bit of wood or i go read a book or i take a walk in the woods.

some people think of me as the emotionless man, i suppose because i am always very calm and a bit detached from everything going on around me. but, because of this, i can act and react to situations without fretting. alot of people freak out about stuff. i don't.

to answer your question, its better to get it out, off your chest. if you keep it bottled up inside, it will come out when it is least convenient. with someone you really trust, talk to them about it. with someone you met last week and are getting to know, maybe its better to have a chat with your dog. its ultimately up to what vibes you are getting.
 
Nothing wrong with having a short meltdown from time to time, makes you feel better and after you can get your act together a lot better.
 
siguy said:
personally, when i am feeling down, i just get over it. i distract myself with something, and get my mind off of it. in a survival situation, this would be a pile of chores that need doing. in a normal day to day setting, i sit down and whittle on a bit of wood or i go read a book or i take a walk in the woods.

some people think of me as the emotionless man, i suppose because i am always very calm and a bit detached from everything going on around me. but, because of this, i can act and react to situations without fretting. alot of people freak out about stuff. i don't.

to answer your question, its better to get it out, off your chest. if you keep it bottled up inside, it will come out when it is least convenient. with someone you really trust, talk to them about it. with someone you met last week and are getting to know, maybe its better to have a chat with your dog. its ultimately up to what vibes you are getting.
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Kind of wierd, it sounded like you were describing me. Great minds think alike, eh? My GF and people that know me are always amazed at how calm I can stay under any kind of pressure. When me and my GF were in a car accident about two years ago (not my fault, lady did illegal turn right into us), I calmly asked how she was and I got out of the car and assisted her to the side of the road. My GF was freaking out and later on she and my friends (they showed up during the accident) were amazed at how I reacted.

I guess it is the detatched thing. I am always the go to guy as mentioned above by Codger_64. I guess all of us think and react the same, that is why we all like knives :), J.
 
I guess to sum up, a brief period fo freak out is OK at certain times but it should be context dependent.
 
chrisaloia said:
I guess to sum up, a brief period fo freak out is OK at certain times but it should be context dependent.
Click to expand...

"Freak out" at the appropriate time, but take responsibility for the process, i.e.,
don't become identified with what comes up, like fear. Think of the physical and emotional effects that come up as just "energy" and "adrenaline" burning itself off in the most efficient manner.
This works for me.
Disclaimer: I'm not professionally qualified to give any advice.
 
Let it all out, but do it in a constructive way like cutting firewood while talking to yourself, then move on to arguing with yourself, and then onto those tough to split logs. Then stop take a break, have a smoke, recollect yourself.
 
For fairly minor setbacks, my tendancy is to throw a fit for a few moments (if circumstances permit), and then deal with the problem. For serious problems, I tend to be cool and deal with them, and then vent afterwards.
 
This is a topic that doesn't get too much airtime. I mean...a....that is why I posted it. It is not like I ever broke down or anything.

I will pass this great info on to My friend who really needs it.
 
Just don't cut your leg off when you throw your fit and start swingin that big knife around. :D

Fear is a good motivator, but depression will kill your spirit and anger has the ability to make you lose sight of your goal and become sloppy. Your attitude has to be, that no matter what is thrown at you, YOU WILL OVERCOME IT! Which means keeping your wits about you and remaining calm. No matter what you have to do, in order to acheive that.
 
longbow50 said:
Just don't cut your leg off when you throw your fit and start swingin that big knife around. :D

Fear is a good motivator, but depression will kill your spirit and anger has the ability to make you lose sight of your goal and become sloppy. Your attitude has to be, that no matter what is thrown at you, YOU WILL OVERCOME IT! Which means keeping your wits about you and remaining calm. No matter what you have to do, in order to acheive that.
Click to expand...

This is one of the best lessons I have learned in life, IMHO. The difference in "I feel" and "I think". Acting out of emotion (depression, fear, hate, etc.) is almost always wrong. Acting out of logical thinking is most often best.

Wimminks taught me this! ;)

Codger
 
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