Advice? Selling it all. She’s leaving me after 17.5 yrs together.

PrairieWalker said:
maybe the wife and the house is all the downsizing you need to do?
the rest might fit like a glove without the other 2.
good luck.
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That’s genius level thinking. I always see people in tiny houses though and wonder WTF? Where do they store their Gransfors Bruks small forest axe? Or 30 pair of shoes for that matter? My Allen Edmund shoes alone would have to be downsized.
 
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not2sharp said:
Sorry to hear. Losing the wife can often be a blessing; there is a lot of underlying stress that goes away with her. I would suggest you give yourself some time to unwind. Focus on the job and then the housing situation. You are now going to be more open to relocation, you are no longer anchored down by her or her job. I wouldn't worry about the gadgets, you can decide on those. once you get yourself and the big two (job and housing) sorted out, you can then decide what you want to do with the stuff.

Best of luck with the new life.

n2s
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Thank you very much. Sage advice. I have friends reaching out with rooms. So that’s comforting. I do want to stick close by 10 year old daughter if possible. I was daddy daycare, primary transport for most her life…used to have a lot of money which afforded me more time with her.
 
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I know this sounds bad..... but with her recent loss of a parent...... was their any inheritance? any life insurance?
maybe that is what she wants out Now....... because she can now afford to.

In my state you would be entitled to Half.

maybe getting a lawyer involved would be beneficial to you?
 
Crag the Brewer said:
I know this sounds bad..... but with her recent loss of a parent...... was their any inheritance? any life insurance?
maybe that is what she wants out Now....... because she can now afford to.

In my state you would be entitled to Half.

maybe getting a lawyer involved would be beneficial to you?
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Nope. Everything is all good on the financial front. Took care of that 12 years ago with estate planning. No child support. No alimony, palimony. $ is a non issue very luckily. All properties previously sold. No lawyers even. It’s definitely not a money thing.
 
AmericanEDC said:
Nope. Everything is all good on the financial front. Took care of that 12 years ago with estate planning. No child support. No alimony, palimony. $ is a non issue very luckily. All properties previously sold. No lawyers even. It’s definitely not a money thing.
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No, I meant for You....... So You aren't forced to sell your stuff and be homeless.

If she was receiving some monies.... That money is Yours too.
at least in my state it is.
equal 50/50
 
Kirk Raptor said:
Having been there and done that, I feel for you. It's as if life has just gone up in smoke.

Best economic advice I can offer is don't put a lot of stuff into a storage locker. You run the risk of paying in rent far more than your things are worth. (Been there, done that, too.)

Now's the time to stick close to your friends and what family you have, lest you yourself develop depression. Good luck with the job hunt. Throwing yourself into work will at least occupy your mind productively.

That said, there is no easy way past the pain. But it will pass. Best of luck.
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I think everything you wrote is dead on. I’m in a commission only career I did great at. But starting over is devastating. But I need to pour myself into some sort of alternative variable compensation situation as I’m a work ethic machine. I don’t tire. Doesn’t matter what I’m doing. So I have that going for me.

Agreed about storage. No matter what my possessions will not go into storage. I have 2 people locally with garages who have offered temp storage. I’m organized into bins.
Crag the Brewer said:
No, I meant for You....... So You aren't forced to sell your stuff and be homeless.

If she was receiving some monies.... That money is Yours too.
at least in my state it is.
equal 50/50
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Sorry, I wasn't clear. There's no money. She had to send her own money to help bury her mother. 0 assets.
 
You could probably sell everything you mention here. Get a bunch of different sized flat rate boxes from the post office and learn how to print your own labels from usps.com. You don't have to weigh anything and you can just dump a pile of boxes at the post office when you are ready. For handguns call the FFL's around you and figure out who will ship them for you. It's cheaper than shipping yourself and they can help you. One near me just wants a copy of the FFL that the gun is going to and contact info for the buyer. I hand them the case and they box it up and ship. It's almost easier than meeting people locally. If you sell to a gunstore you will get $300 for a $700 gun. You could sell it here for $500 shipped and someone will get a great deal and so will you.
 
bofe954 said:
You could probably sell everything you mention here. Get a bunch of different sized flat rate boxes from the post office and learn how to print your own labels from usps.com. You don't have to weigh anything and you can just dump a pile of boxes at the post office when you are ready. For handguns call the FFL's around you and figure out who will ship them for you. It's cheaper than shipping yourself and they can help you. One near me just wants a copy of the FFL that the gun is going to and contact info for the buyer. I hand them the case and they box it up and ship. It's almost easier than meeting people locally. If you sell to a gunstore you will get $300 for a $700 gun. You could sell it here for $500 shipped and someone will get a great deal and so will you.
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Love it, agreed especially for the firearm sales. I'm looking to "good for both" deal it. About to list another knife and I'm going to offer it up for what I think is a low price, see what happens. I priced one FFL and it was silly. $50 plus cost of shipping. I think I can find lower...local pawn shops. I'll shop that out tomorrow. Putting an extra $75 plus would kill good deals for both. I have some decisions to make about which handguns to let go.
 
jill jackson said:
Your wife isn't, or recently going through menopause is she? I have talked to many people who got divorced when that happened. It's common enough if you Google it a lot comes up. Hormones a doctor prescribes can even make a woman more sensitive, during menopause and it's just a very difficult time for some women.
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THIS!
Went through 2 1/2 years on the knife edge of divorce. In denial the whole time.
She couldn't do hormones due to cancer background.
She threw all the can soup in the pantry at me because what she wanted wasn't there. Assault with a deadly food?
Stick it out and stay close to her. She may come out to be who she was.
Homeless? Sell it all, get a van, go mobile.
 
Well, don't take my opinion seriously but if a part of my life disappears, I'll try to hold on to what's left. Hope things turn out well for you. And as they say, you don't stop dating your woman. And a woman shouldn't stop flirting with her man. I think there's a better-than-50%-chance the two of you will work things out.
 
kvaughn said:
THIS!
Went through 2 1/2 years on the knife edge of divorce. In denial the whole time.
She couldn't do hormones due to cancer background.
She threw all the can soup in the pantry at me because what she wanted wasn't there. Assault with a deadly food?
Stick it out and stay close to her. She may come out to be who she was.
Homeless? Sell it all, get a van, go mobile.
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Exactly. I'll stay close, we share a 10 year old amazing daughter. We're stuck to each other. Hah!
Thanks for your thoughts. Recently got pissed at me for asking if she wanted an Asian sauce from the fridge for a spring roll: "If I want sauce, I'll get up and get it myself!" Okay, alien freak from hell, get your own F-ing sauce in the future.
Had a job interview tonight, progressed to 2nd and final interview, expecting a call to schedule in a couple days. So homelessness is in name only though technically I will be if I can't qualify for rental housing. I do have a wealthy close friend and brother can help. So living in my (mini) van isn't likely. Others offering up rooms. Few know about my situation. It's embarrassing so very few. 5 people I know, one my brother. I do find this heartbreaking and embarrassing.

It would be cool to live mobile. I wasn't looking at a Sprinter by Pathfinder of Canada. $144k. So cool and none of that van conversion compromise. Diesel, tow package, dual axle. Enticing.
 
I've been married 50 years and as of 2018 we're both retired. We planned downsizing a few years prior to that. Paid off all debt, got rid of our 2nd car,
so our home was our only debt. Sold our big house which we bought for about 60% of construction cost. We have been very lucky buying houses. Our first house,1977, we sold for 90% profit after 3 years just from luck in timing.
The last year I started selling off my knives. Bladeforums takes a long time if they do sell. I've used Arizona Custom Knives to sell the last 8. Traded up for 3 knives I really didn't need but was too good a deal to pass on. I've had the knives for 10 to 20 years so many have appreciated. Sold a Randall I paid 180 for for 495. They get 25% but almost all sold within 30 days. Communication and customer service was better than any company I've dealt with before. Try them out. Good Luck to you.
 
severtecher said:
I've been married 50 years and as of 2018 we're both retired. We planned downsizing a few years prior to that. Paid off all debt, got rid of our 2nd car,
so our home was our only debt. Sold our big house which we bought for about 60% of construction cost. We have been very lucky buying houses. Our first house,1977, we sold for 90% profit after 3 years just from luck in timing.
The last year I started selling off my knives. Bladeforums takes a long time if they do sell. I've used Arizona Custom Knives to sell the last 8. Traded up for 3 knives I really didn't need but was too good a deal to pass on. I've had the knives for 10 to 20 years so many have appreciated. Sold a Randall I paid 180 for for 495. They get 25% but almost all sold within 30 days. Communication and customer service was better than any company I've dealt with before. Try them out. Good Luck to you.
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Thank you! I may try here first. I do believe Arizona has a decent clientele for the expensive stuff. I do have an original Cold Steel tanto fixed I may send to them to see what they think. I'm told it's worth something.
 
AmericanEDC said:
Thank you! I may try here first. I do believe Arizona has a decent clientele for the expensive stuff. I do have an original Cold Steel tanto fixed I may send to them to see what they think. I'm told it's worth something.
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As a Gold member with the ability to sell here, you can also post your stuff up to ask what it's worth.

(In the discussion forums )
 
Man, I'm sorry to hear this. However I will tell you I have two buddies who will tell anyone that their divorce was the best thing that ever happened to them.

And it's not that they were looking to split up... their wives had just had enough of whatever, and bolted.

Both of them attest that the fresh air that rushed in on them was not only surprising, but welcome. I believe them (but I'm not drafting my separation paperwork to verify)

Knives should move here just fine, and the Gadgets and Gear sales forum is very active. FFL to FFL shipping is easy... yes it's a couple of bucks, but far better than a pawn shop sale.

And there's no limit to the gear that will sell on there either... it is free for you to offer it up, so I see no reason not to give it a shot.

Funny that a "Divorce forces sale" titled sales thread is like honey for getting a crap ton of ants to come shopping! (I mean funny strange, not funny ha-ha)

I honestly feel that the part of your character that holds the tireless work ethic is gonna serve you very well here. That will keep you focused and busy on something productive.

And don't badmouth a kid's mother in front of them. It's harmful to them and doesn't help you any either. This one I know from experience.

Fair winds and following seas to you, Man.
 
Just drop in to the General Discussion Forum and say "How much is this stuff worth?", put a list of stuff in the thread and we'll do our level best for ye'.

General Knife Discussion would do for the knives, but I'd drop in to the "Gadgets and Gear" forum in Community to get ideas on your firearms and other gear.
 
Velitrius said:
Just drop in to the General Discussion Forum and say "How much is this stuff worth?", put a list of stuff in the thread and we'll do our level best for ye'.

General Knife Discussion would do for the knives, but I'd drop in to the "Gadgets and Gear" forum in Community to get ideas on your firearms and other gear.
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Thanks. I’ll put a list together.
 
I'm on my third wife and have lost seven figures to get here so whatever I say ignore it.
 
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