Come One, Come MALL NINJAS!!

[Nimick]

No,

This is the biggest, baddest, ninja ever

 

[thombrogan]

I never got to go to the mall as much as I wanted when I was a teen (that may have been before womens' suffrage anyways), so I was a wannabe-mall ninja.

Never was good at cutting (other than myself by accident) until I stopped attending martial arts classes. Apparently, the shoulder slice/abdomen rend/sternum puncture combo that makes my training knives whistle with the wind means nothing when trying to cut a tomato into slices with an even width. And no joint-locking, balance-breaking move from any archepelago just off of the Eurasian landmass has worked as consistently as a disarm for me than the "I'll take it" emails I've sent to others on this forum.

There's also some weird sense of enjoyment when you finally take your ninjer books and give 'em to Goodwill. Is it from helping someone get their hands on a book they otherwise couldn't afford or is it from reclaiming shelfspace? Probably just the shelfspace.

 

[tradja]

Two 'hips' and a 'hooray' for the quite possibly the best post in months. I needed that...
-Mark

Seconded. Great post, Stephan!

I resembled a mall ninja at times in my early teens. Sure, I had the cheap throwing stars, made some nunchucks out of a shovel handle and some chain, the 3-pack of UC throwing knives from SMKW, the $49 UC Ninja Sword, and read ninja how-to books (written by Stephen Hayes (?) ) Stephan, is that you?

 

[Stephan]

No not me. Thanks, at least this one is going better than my other one, I'm just about to get death theats . . . which is almost as staisfying.

 

[500jefferyDK]

Stephan

This post made my cry
Best post in months.
Keep em coming:thumbup:
You are one funny man and have captured the essence on collecting stupid knives.
Most collectors do not have a answer to the question "What are you going to use that knife for?" and that is funny

I am a mall Ninja last stupid knife I bought was the Tracker by TOPS - lets not even go there.

Cheers,

André

 

[Normark]

Hey Guys...

Heres another RL Ninja picture..

ttyle

Eric...

 

[Cutshaw]

Was this Donatello or Raphael??

 

[silenthunterstudios]

Everyone knows real mall ninjas carry lightsabers!

 

[san jose savage]

I'm a mall ninja

quantity not quality lol

big 5 for teh win

the best 14.99 ever spent usually gets spent after looking in the sunday add's for knives ..

 

[Deadhead Archer]

Isn't that a Busse AK-47 with a Buy Brown sheath? A mall ninja cannot afford that.

Also, unlike mall ninjas, he has a GUN holster. If he is a ninja, he's a ninja with an identity crisis.

No, the true face of the mall ninja is now this:

 

[Stephan]

Stephan

This post made my cry
Best post in months.
Keep em coming:thumbup:
You are one funny man and have captured the essence on collecting stupid knives.
Most collectors do not have a answer to the question "What are you going to use that knife for?" and that is funny

I am a mall Ninja last stupid knife I bought was the Tracker by TOPS - lets not even go there.

Cheers,

André

Thanks for the moral booster, I'm happy to see there are people who 'get it'. By the way, the other thread has been shipped to W&C (Wine and Cheese forum). Since then, there has been a 'slight' turn around in it's direction. For a good laugh, check it out here!

http://www.bladeforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=405644

Make sure you read the last few pages if you decide on posting!

 

[MEGALON]

Thanks for the moral booster, I'm happy to see there are people who 'get it'. By the way, the other thread has been shipped to W&C (Wine and Cheese forum). Since then, there has been a 'slight' turn around in it's direction. For a good laugh, check it out here!

http://www.bladeforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=405644

Make sure you read the last few pages if you decide on posting!

you're not supposed to link to whine & cheese, dude...

 

[Stephan]

Oops, sorry, thanks for the info.

 

[cockroachfarm]

Isn't that a Busse AK-47 with a Buy Brown sheath?.....

I believe the sheath was custom made by knifemaker James McGowan.

 

[mr.trooper]

Isn't that a Busse AK-47 with a Buy Brown sheath? A mall ninja cannot afford that.

Also, unlike mall ninjas, he has a GUN holster. If he is a ninja, he's a ninja with an identity crisis.

No, the true face of the mall ninja is now this:

If you wana' get TECHNICAL he is Gear Whore NOT a Mall Ninja.

Mall Ninja buy hyped up crap because they think they are Bad Ass. A Gear Whore actualy knows stuff about knives and guns, and has the budget to buy lots of them, but never actualy uses any of it.

 

[DANTHEMAN123]

all the gear no idea...

if you dont mind telling me, hows do you catch bores with a knife? much like jon locke on LOST? thats a point, anyone know what knives jon locke had on lost?oh, and what is that knife your holding as i guess thats you and you guide with the two staffs...

 

[Nimick]

all the gear no idea...

if you dont mind telling me, hows do you catch bores with a knife? much like jon locke on LOST? thats a point, anyone know what knives jon locke had on lost?oh, and what is that knife your holding as i guess thats you and you guide with the two staffs...

 

[rottwang]

http://www.bladeforums.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=56430&stc=1&d=1149096992 [/img]

Nothing quite like a little goth themed bondage at the local renfaire to ruin it for the little kids. Maybe they didn't get changed from the night before :yawn:
/snip

quite honestly though these people look like they have too much of a social life to be mall ninjas. The mall ninja I am best acquainted with claimed to speak Klingon, ... knew "Ninjitsu" even though there are no schools teaching it and owned a dull, rat-tang display set of fake katanas. :barf:

 

[Cutshaw]

quite honestly though these people look like they have too much of a social life to be mall ninjas. The mall ninja I am best acquainted with claimed to speak Klingon, ... knew "Ninjitsu" even though there are no schools teaching it and owned a dull, rat-tang display set of fake katanas. :barf:

True! The goth kids probably went out at night as teens while the true mall ninja stayed home playing dungeons and dragons. Even the Ren Faire players were probably too social (and fit) to be compared to a mall ninja.

The goth girls were always fun to date! Very... frisky!

 

[BobKoontz]

I work for Arnold.....does that make me some sort of civil service type of Mall Ninja?

Maybe not- we don't have a mall in our neck of the woods.