Day 1: the end of my Cursed existence.

Apr 23, 2003

Good luck. It's funny you are starting today. I started an extreme diet on Sat. after getting the approval from a dr for a John Hopkins diabetic diet. So I'm going to be trying to kick my addiction to food. Bad thing is I can't quit cold turkey......still have to eat, but this is a regulated program that you have to have special meals for.....kind of like reverse MRE's to me :barf: ......and by the time I can eat again hopefully I'll have managed to find other ways to deal with stress besides food. I have to attend meeting 2x's a week and have blood work done regularily and monitor everything that goes in and comes out :barf: but if it works it will be worth Christmas I'll post some before and after pics :eek:They seem to think my "due" date is Dec. 16. By then there should be only half of me here....LOL

The alcohol thing I do hope will be easier. I went from being a heavy drinker...about a pint of scotch a day plus a bottle of wine to nothing by having friends who didn't drink invite me over and not serve alcohol. So I had a built in support group and after getting through the first week, actually liked knowing what I was actually doing for a change. :eek: I seem to have lots of addictive tendencies. My other addiction is getting better with abstinence, too. Do wish that one wasn't being worked on, but then what can I say.:rolleyes:

Hopefully you will be able to post here when you feel a need and we will all help you through your hard times. Good luck and I'll keep you in my prayers. :)
Mar 26, 2002
& respect for your commitment

Whenever you find yourself thinking of alcohol in any form
Go DO something else
that involves bodywork

walking can be good
running, practice of a sport or an art
chop wood
dig holes
hammer nails
Start learning something new (physical)
-if- it doesn't cause you frustration

avoid frustrations
for now


it doesn't have to be outwordly worthwhile,
at the moment, inwardly,
you're trying to clear a new road in your mind,

think, about what you're doing,
nothing else

This is a meditation.
This is training your mind.

Try different activities,
you'll know when something is working
for you
at that moment

I would recommend going to help someone else with work,
BUT, way too easy to be offered a beer while working up a sweat,
--avoid the circumstance for now--
& avoid 'helpful' people
who tell you that you haven't a problem
& just 'take it easy'

as always

respect for your wife for being back
& ready to help you.

If you haven't already
look for a local AA chapter, or similar

You -can- do it.

only on moving forward
even the smallest progress

where you were a minute or a week past
for worse or for better
doesn't matter
It's past
It's gone

The 'next' is what matters.

Be true to yourself.
Be true to family.

Every instant is a NEW choice.

Looking back while trying to move forward
can make you trip & fall.

Staring at your feet, or bellybutton,
can cause you to lose sight of your new path.

Focus on where you are going
and the next step in that direction
however small
or large

become aware of the patterns that are problematic
choose new patterns, new habits in their place:
blow bubbles

as I said before;
You CAN.
& respect for your commitment

Be well

<>they call me
<> Tips <> Baha'i Prayers Links --A--T--H--D
Mar 26, 2002
Ad Astra said:
I feel like I am entering the arena, and the opponent is a vicious a__-kicker.
I am planning to put on the absolute best fight I can.
If you visualize an opponent
then you visualize defeat.

Chronic pain patients who fight the pain
find the pain increasing

Those who accept the presence of the pain
find it tends to fall into the background more

if you focus on anything,
it becomes bigger.

What do you want your focus to be?

Find an acceptable outlet for emotions held in,
they grow bigger too, until released
chop wood
carry water
scream at the salt waves

<>they call me
<> Tips <> Baha'i Prayers Links --A--T--H--D
Apr 14, 2005
God bless you, Michael. I'm happy to hear that your wife is back; I know how utterly I depended on mine thru 5 heart bypasses, and the cancer that followed. You might want to pick up a thin little book called "Hug Therapy". I know it sounds hokey, but has worked for me..... :)


Gold Member
Dec 28, 2003
Personally, I need a support group for my HIKV addiction, but you guys ain't it! :D More like a bunch of enablers, and Yangdu's the pusher man!

Actually, the addiction is a bit self-regulating, as things like food and bills interfere. I'll have to work on that...! ;) :D

Jun 16, 2003

The news about the house is great.

The news about your decision to be sober is so very much greater.

I have no personal story of overcoming addition. I looked at three generations of alcoholics up to my biological father and an alcoholic stepdad and never could drink. Too scared that I'd be what I saw in them.

Good for you. A better life.

Oct 15, 1998
Great news!

Now you gotta change your location in your profile!!

Smoke being sent. I really wish you the best in this battle. I've seen too many families destroyed due to addictions of one kind or another.

I salute your wife also...this is going to be tough on her too.

Never give up, never surrender.
Mar 22, 2002
No, Ad Astra, you're not alone, are you? Look at the response in this thread.

Jul 30, 2004
munk said:
No, Ad Astra, you're not alone, are you? Look at the response in this thread.

I am humbled by the caring words... thank you all so very much. Your support is a blessing I can never repay.

I am not looking forward to the next few days.... my mind is racing and it seems like time is going very slow... I just want to sleep. Some anxiety. These pills don't do anything for withdrawl symptoms... I'm a little worried. Luckily, a beautiful nurse will be looking after me tonight... yes, it's my wife.

Ad Astra
Jun 16, 2002
We're with you Ad. When things are going crazy, you just remember that the guys here are thinking about you and praying hard for you to get through this.

Here at the Cantina, we never leave a man behind!!

Let that echo through you're mind. Cares and positive thoughts from Canada.

Give 'em Hell Ad!
Dec 3, 2000
Huh...strange...I've spent quite a few years of my life dealing with alcoholics. My brother is one. (hasn't had a drink in umpteen years) I was fortunate enough to learn from his misfortunes and be very leery of alcohol myself.

When I was an EMT and worked Security at the Native Hospital the very smell of alcohol pissed me off to no end, and made me want to vomit. Every time I smelled it I thought of car accidents, battered spouses, crying children,grown men puking on themselves, all the nasty things I'd seen with good buddy alcohol hanging in the background chuckling like some foul demon.

Yet, I have no real advice to give. All I can say is I'll be praying for ya' and I believe you will pull through this. Remember that if you can take care of today tomorrow will take care of itself. You're a helluva good guy with some incredibly good advice being given from alot of other good guys. I believe you will make it. I guess that's all I got to say.
Feb 12, 2001
Hang in there, Ad Astra. Not drinking can be a good thing. Tough at first, but it gets better. I've not consumed any liquor for over a year and a half now. Feel free to email me or PM me if you wanna talk.
Sep 25, 2002
I'm pulling for you. I'm no stranger to addiction, either. Over the years I have given up: weed, speed, ecstsacy, acid and muscle relaxers. With booze I got about three steps from the point of no return. Now I can have a drink every once in a while. But all that other sh!t... I can't do it nor do I miss it. Cigarettes are the last of my addictions (well that and coffee). Marlboros are the b!tch of the bunch. Go figure. Just know you're not alone and we're all pulling for you. Feel free to email me any time. God bless.



Chief Cook & Bottle Wash
Nov 11, 2003
Glad to see that you have made the first great leap Mike...

As I told you before...a lot of us (good guys too) have been down the same roads.

You have my email...and total support.