Dealing with "That Guy"

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Rick Marchand

Rick Marchand

Donkey on the Edge
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Thanks so much for helping me sort this out, guys. I appreciated your time and input.

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Time to tell him..."Don't tell people what you know...show them what you know"

We see it here don't we. Lots of advice but you can not find a good example of their work ....pictures are always promised but never materialize.
 
Calling him out will cause you to lose a friend.

I have had friends who lie just because they were liars...lol

Show me don't tell me is often a good comeback after a tall tale.
 
I have one of those friends as well but he just moved to Alberta to become an electrician, so he says. Some people really cant help what they say and often honestly believe the things they tell people. Dont call him out but but ask him to stop saying stuff that he knows isnt true if you feel it could hurt your business reputation. And put it in those terms, that its possible he is doing some damage to the business.
 
Can you pull the "you're my friend so I know you will take it the best way when I tell you you've got to cut the crap and stop bragging to people. This is not a competition"?

You have to decide if it's worth the effort and if it is either hit it head-on hard or work on it over time. When you're dealing with a someone who is so bound up in competing and bragging or lying you have limited options.

My advice is don't let him make commitments that involve you and if he does disentangle yourself. Don't be as available. Reward good behavior but don't reward bad behavior.
 
I know that guy's twin brother. I had him as a friend for 20 years. It was a very happy day was when he moved to Arkansas.

He would tell whoppers and exaggerate ( or fabricate) his abilities and accomplishments. I remember one time when he was talking to a person and started telling about the jewelry store he ued to have in downtown Norfolk.....where he and I worked together....and telling what a great jeweler he was. At one time I tried to teach him basic jewelry repair , but he just didn't have the skills. He used to hang out in my store and occasionally run errands for me, but he was never a jeweler, or a jewelry store owner.

I eventually just limited my time with him and was not "available" as often as he would like.

The sad thing is that these people actually believe some of these stories.
 
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If its already to this point you are going to have to tell him honestly about his
ranting bullshit. Hopefully both should feel better about it. This forum is a great
example of exactly what you're talking about. Pictures can speak many words.
Ken.
 
He actually sounds like he might have some mental health issues. People don't usually tell outlandish lies for no reason. While you can't let his behavior damage your reputation or your business you may need to tread a little carefully. You said yourself that he is a good guy; maybe make sure he knows that's why you like him but the lies are unnecessary. Point out what makes him a great guy but I wouldn't be entertaining any of his lies.
 
"Do not offer sympathy to the mentally ill; it is a bottomless pit. Tell them firmly: 'I am not paid to listen to this drivel. You are a terminal fool.' " - William S. Burroughs.

What that means is, the guy has issues you are neither equipped, nor required, to deal with. It's not much different than being in a relationship with a drug addict or a serial abuser. They are all psychic vampires who will drag you down with them at every opportunity.

Don't fall for the hero trap - nothing you say or do is likely to straighten this character out. Unless you want your life to turn into one long episode of Dr. Phil, you really only have two choices: accept it and let the BS run over you like water off a duck's back, or walk away.
 
Hahaha...

Tell the guy is a real Baron Von Munchhausen
 
Ohhhhhhh.... that guy!

Rick, I didn't spend a lot of time with him while I was there so no, nothing extraordinary. If this is the same person who we spoke of a while back though... my comment at the time was something like "and just why is this guy working for you?".... them the writing's been on the wall for quite a while, eh?

You said it above, its your livelihood.

-Peter
 
Sometimes Friends and Family can not work together in order to stay Friends and Family.I have seen this first hand.Give him the choice friend or co-worker.
 
I'm not a psychologist or a psychiatrist but he seems to exhibit signs of narcissistic personality disorder. Here is what Mayo has to say about it: http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-...ality-disorder/basics/definition/con-20025568
I don't know what this means for your friendship as I don't think there is necessarily a treatment for it if in fact he has this but sometimes we have to set boundaries with certain people or risk losing their friendship altogether.
Just my 2 cents. Hope it works out with your friendship!
 
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