Dealing With The Universal Becker Blade Half-Life Formula

Plus, a Scotsman is never drunk so long as he can find a blade of grass to hold onto to keep from flying off the earth. I dinna think ye want to mess with any Scot, lest ye find the dirk has let yer insides seep inta the outside. How many of yeu kin lift a 180 lb. log and throw it end over end? NONE of ye, that's who. So, keep yer pieholes shut aboot the Scots!
Aye! A ken! Real highlander blood flows through these veins! How class would it be tae have a mini Becker Dirk!
 
Aye! A ken! Real highlander blood flows through these veins! How class would it be tae have a mini Becker Dirk!

Perhaps that's what my 5 project should become......hmmmm. I dinna ken ifn I kin pull it off....but it might be worth a few pints and some thought. Or jest a few pints, and misguided notions.
 
Perhaps that's what my 5 project should become......hmmmm. I dinna ken ifn I kin pull it off....but it might be worth a few pints and some thought. Or jest a few pints, and misguided notions.
If you pull off a Becker Dirk you'd soon command some mighty respect with yae huge sporran! Hahaha That's like a Grandes Cojones for all the non-Gàidhlig speakers.. Haha
 
when somebody is being unsafe/whiny/a douchebag, that person should be called a "proton"
 
From now on, call me Quark.

Huh. Maybe.

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I just need to point out that the redbud tree you were cutting was obviously in your yard. The variables are different when you are in the "bush", and I'm sorry but, cutting trees in your yard just is not a proper demonstration of the Universal Becker Blade Half-Life Formula.

You will know that you're truly in the "bush" when you see an abandoned corner post and a chain link fence. (But don't chop the post. Old posts often have nails or staples or bits of wire in them that will ding your blade.)
 
SS, I'll pass this information on to tradewater, who is currently working on a Unified Becker Half Life Theory. It's like A Beautiful Mind meets Grizzly Adams.
 
I don't understand why anyone would want a half life. Get out there and live. Do shit.
 
If we all agree that "proton = unsafe whiny douchebag", then any time we want to use "unsafe whiny douchebag" we can just type "proton" instead, saving 22 keystrokes and about 6 seconds of typing time.

example -

"When we went camping, John was an unsafe whiny douchebag all weekend."

"When we went camping, John was a proton all weekend."

Saves time AND reduces the likelihood of developing carpal tunnel syndrome AND reduces the number of bits Spark has to store on the server. Win-Win-Win. :D
 
"Proton" sounds very super hero-ish, I on the other hand am an idiot.
 
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well, we here at Beckerland will know that "proton" will never equal "super hero"
 
I told my daughter that next year in science class, when discussing atoms, she should say the nucleus is made up of neutrons and whiney douchebags. Surprisingly, she was motivated knowing the description would disrupt the class. :D
 
If we all agree that "proton = unsafe whiny douchebag", then any time we want to use "unsafe whiny douchebag" we can just type "proton" instead, saving 22 keystrokes and about 6 seconds of typing time.

I say this theory should undergo peer review in a few journals, and then I'll present it at the next symposium to be known as "Zzyzzogeton's first law of conservation of douchestrokes" or Z1d for short. The math seems bulletproof to me.
 
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