Family is mad of my expensive knife purchases

22-rimfire said:
You'll win a lot of points when you tell your spouse they need to see a skrink over their questioning the rationality of a knife purchase. :D
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It's not about a knife as much as it is about respect or even consideration of the spouse... ;)

The item doesn't matter.....
 
Simply explain to her at least it's not like you're blowing money on booze,drugs or whores. Make sure she has an equal amount of money to pursue her interests and you should be golden.
 
Craig, I know this thread has blossomed into human psychology and relationships, but it has been a great thread and one that makes me look at myself and my own tendancies.

The equality issue is a tough one. I followed that rule for years and the result was that I never purchased another firearm because it was all about equality. Then we split up and I realized it was more about trust and respect.
 
skyhorse said:
Simply explain to her at least it's not like you're blowing money on booze,drugs or whores. Make sure she has an equal amount of money to pursue her interests and you should be golden.
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Exactly...

And if they can't except that then it's time to kick her to the curb....
 
22-rimfire said:
Craig, I know this thread has blossomed into human psychology and relationships, but it has been a great thread and one that makes me look at myself and my own tendancies.

The equality issue is a tough one. I followed that rule for years and the result was that I never purchased another firearm because it was all about equality. Then we split up and I realized it was more about trust and respect.
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It's really mostly about respect, and that is really the big issue along with if the person can really look past themselves or not and sadly most really can't.

That is the real problem.....
 
When someone develops an interest to a certain level of sophistication it sometimes becomes difficult for others to understand. It's human nature. My priorities are different from yours and so it goes. I can bore the socks off most people when I start talking about those pursuits that I'm most interested in so I try to just shut the hell up most of the time. That seems to work okay for me.

Unless you're spending the house note and grocery money on your interests and neglecting your responsibilities, so what?
 
Craig083 said:
...I don't want to lie about the price because I'm proud to pay a lot for excellent American made knives
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Proud to pay a lot? Sometimes I'm willing but don't know about being proud about it. Sounds like you might like to show off your new knives and tell everyone what they cost. Maybe they can't afford such things and dislike being reminded that you can.

Regardless, as long as family needs are met do as you wish. The only one you need to be concerned about is your wife. Reach an understanding with her (she has her own favorite non-essentials too I would imagine) and forget about the rest.
 
Blue Sky reminded me of the "pay a lot" comment in your original post. You also mentioned that your wife attended culinary school. She should have some understanding about knife quality. Might even be part of the reason you two are together today as a shared interest.

I would avoid mentioning cost especially when discussing knives with the extended family. I remember when my sister first started visiting "home" with her husband-to-be who liked better knives and custom knives, the cost issue was central to our questioning his perspective. You have to understand that we thought a $50 Case slipjoint was expensive at that time. Throw up a Randall and we just shook our heads.... I don't even want to go there when he showed a custom made by Bill Moran. We had no idea who Bill Moran was. It colored an entire attitude toward him that stuck for years. Everything had to be "the best". He actually is a really great guy. So, if you bring out your knives to show the extended family, don't bring out a bunch. Choose a couple to display and perhaps discuss and you need to understand their perspective on cost and value. I would also try to focus on the utility of the knives and perhaps your sharpening skills.
 
Ankerson said:
It's goes much deeper that knives....

Sounds like the wife needs to see a shrink...
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I don't think she needs a shrink...Note "It's funny how my wife can justify a 250$ purse, but she thinks buying an expensive knife is stupid."

This is kind of what most women have running around in their DNA. I don't fight it; I have my own obsessions.
Like a previous poster said, we each have our own "pot" to spend as we choose. It works well...very well...even if she buys purses with "our" money instead. She gives most of "her" money to the grandkids, and that's okay. I don't give money to relatives; I give 'em folding or fixed-blade knives, and that pleases me...
 
22-rimfire said:
The equality issue is a tough one.
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Equality doesn't really exist. I once heard Gerald Ford once repeat something his wife said --- along the lines of marriage is a 70%/30% proposition. Sometimes you are 70% give and 30% take, sometimes you are 70% take and 30% give. The trick is for neither partner to not get stuck into either and to discern when you need to move from one or the other.
 
Its my experience that most females do not collect stuff like men do, so it's hard for them to grasp the idea.
 
Blue Sky said:
Proud to pay a lot? Sometimes I'm willing but don't know about being proud about it. Sounds like you might like to show off your new knives and tell everyone what they cost. Maybe they can't afford such things and dislike being reminded that you can.

I didn't mean it like that, I meant I will pay a little more for a knife made in the states, and I'm proud to support American jobs . Nobody likes or wants to spend this much money. But in the same sense, I work my tail off 10-12 hours a day at a very physical plant. I work a lot of overtime and also do woodworking and landscaping on the side. So I work extremely hard to get a buck so sometimes I think I deserve it.

Thanks for the advice guys, I got my wife to somewhat understand
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knarfeng said:
My wife and I have been married some 30 years. We have 3 pots of money. "Hers", "mine", and "ours". What she buys out of the "her" pot is up to her. What I buy out of the "my" pot is up to me. What we buy out of the "our" pot, we talk about.
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Same system here. Never once have my wife and I argued about money in over 20 years.

Sometimes it's better not to say what you spend on your stuff just to keep the peace. Not really anyones business anyways. If they ask how much it was , I just say " a fair bit."
 
leghog said:
In a marriage each lie is just a turd on a pile of dung. If you let that pile grow, the dung takes over all of one's senses.
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Didn't Confucius say that? ;) LOL!

That's classic, man; and I agree with it.
 
I tell people that I'll never own an expensive spots car but I can own the knife equivalent. My wife understood what I meant and pretends to be interested when I talk about cool knives I'd like to get.
 
I never get these people who won't talk to their spouses about their knife passion.

My wife is my mate and when I'm excited about something (like a knife) I want to share that with her.
She shares my excitement because It makes me happy.

Can't imagine having to hide something I love from her.
 
My girlfriend didn't really understand why I needed "expensive" knives when a "cheap" knife would work just fine for the same things... So I bought her a few and slowly increased the quality until I bought her a Benchmade. After using it them at work for a few weeks, she asked me why the Griptilian was still sharp and her Leek wasn't. My reply was "exactly". After giving her a quick lesson on blade steels she understood and has since stopped questioning my knives. I will say that I'm glad she hasn't asked me how much my new SMF was though...
 
Sonnydaze said:
I don't think she needs a shrink...Note "It's funny how my wife can justify a 250$ purse, but she thinks buying an expensive knife is stupid."

This is kind of what most women have running around in their DNA. I don't fight it; I have my own obsessions.
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More of a lack or respect or consideration for the spouse really. ;)

Could be reversed and would still be the same issue...

It is a problem.....
 
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