Knifeshow Stupidity

ScarFoot said:
So I have a table at a local knifeshow. This show is put on by one of the largest knife dealers in Alabama so it draws a large crowd and Alabama has a robust knife making community. Anyway, an old timer walks in that apparently helped create the tool we know as knives and knows everything about them. He walks up to my buddy’s table, holds a knife up to his ear and thumps it…says, “I can tell how consistent your grind is by how it rings”. My buddies like “that’s cool” while rolling his eyes because it’s a brut de forge knife. The old timer walks around performing various “tests” on other knives and comes back to my buddy’s table, picks up his most expensive knife and says “if I flex this and it returns true I’ll buy it”. Buddy is like, “okay?.?.?” at that point the old timer literally tries to break the knife on the table. Fortunately my buddy knows his heat treat so the knife is fine and the old man buys it. At that point he steps over to my table and starts handling my knives with reckless abandon. Out of concern for his safety I respectfully said “be careful they’re very sharp”. At this point something amazing happened. He looks at me and says “doesn’t matter how sharp they are, if you don’t drag them they won’t cut.” and he takes one of my best knives and starts chopping his forearm with it like a hatchet. Now I need to point out that whether you love my knives or hate them they have a reputation on the local scene for having absolutely unforgiving and indiscriminate edges. He looks at me and says “see, nothing” about 5 seconds later as he is educating me about sharp edges blood starts rolling down his forearm. I said “watch your shirt there” to which he replied “I scraped it on my screen door this morning…” I was almost speechless and the other makers around me were in shock. It was incredible!

Anyway, I got almost $300 out of the encounter…
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"Sharper than a screen door" might be a good marketing slogan
 
There was more. One line was - "Chuck Norris wants to be Stacy."

The old myth that a knife has to be pulled to cut is pseudo-science. Yes, it will cut faster if pulled, but it will still cut if the edge is acute enough from just its own weight.
This is the premise of how the BESS tests are done. It is a measurement of how much/little force is required to cut a strand of test floss with the knife only resting on the strand. The measurement is in grams and the lower the number, the sharper the edge.

I ran a microtome in pathology/histology and the blades were so sharp they cut right through the prepared or frozen tissues in thousandths of an inch slices. The specimen is pushed into the blade. (That reminds me that I have an old microtome in the upstairs of the shop. I should get it down and put it on the shelves for display.

Sharpness is 10% technique and 90% geometry. No matter how well you sharpen a blade, and how well you strop off the wire, if the geometry is not acute enough, it will cut less well. Take it down to a lower angle and the same knife will cut much better. Take it down to around 10° and it will slice fish in paper thin slices. It will also slice you finger by just an accidental bump. What angle you decide on is based on use, steel, and HT.



I have a woodcarving tool called an Automach. It is a powerful self-contained reciprocating power chisel that you change the chisel bits in a chuck. The chisel bit has to be pressed back to engage the hammer that drives it into the wood. I saw a fellow put a freshly sharpened chisel in it and demonstrate that it won't cut his hand unless he pressed the unit down hard. It cut his palm.
 
BluegrassBrian said:
Reading this thread I’m reminded of a day I was in Sparks shop.. at least 7-8 years ago.
I was checking out some folders and picked up a BM Loco.
Something about the ergs or the way it closed, but I nicked my knuckle and started bleeding all over the counter.
Luckily he had some bandaids on hand.
lol.
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Does have some edge that chunk of S30v..........Pretty good with cardboard too!!! Amazingly..😉
 
I love this thread. Mine isn't funny but it's so common.

I get irritated when show customers pinch the bevels and run their fingers up and down them while talking to me at the table. It makes me nervous they're going to cut themselves, and can scratch my blade. When it happens I wipe the blade w oil and take it off the table after they walk away. I can't reliably see the scratches in show light anymore, so I just pass a belt over them back at the shop. I really don't understand this knife habit. I don't know what they're deducing about the tool, it's absent minded blade play. It happens at every show
 
I did the Antique Arms Show in Vegas one year. My table was about 3/4 the way through.

There was a guy who was similar to the know it all mentioned here walking the show and criticizing everyone and everything.

When he turned down the isle near me I noticed that he had one of those paper toilet seat covers hanging out of the back of his pants. No one bother to tell him because he was such an ass.

I debated telling him or letting him walk the rest of the show that way.

I ended up telling him, let’s just say that he was a lot nicer to people after that.

Hoss
 
Fiddleback said:
I love this thread. Mine isn't funny but it's so common.

I get irritated when show customers pinch the bevels and run their fingers up and down them while talking to me at the table. It makes me nervous they're going to cut themselves, and can scratch my blade. When it happens I wipe the blade w oil and take it off the table after they walk away. I can't reliably see the scratches in show light anymore, so I just pass a belt over them back at the shop. I really don't understand this knife habit. I don't know what they're deducing about the tool, it's absent minded blade play. It happens at every show
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Taking notes from this thread...

If I ever attend a show, I'll be bringing my knives in a locked case, prices clearly on display in large numbers, and a sign that says "RAZOR SHARP BLADES, ASK TO HANDLE, NO HAGGLING."
 
Many years ago I did a Christmas Art and Crafts show held in the courtyard of the German History Museum here in Berlin. All the exhibitors were warned that the stone floor was not sealed and anybody who spilled anything on it would have to pay and for this reason you were not allowed anything to drink at the tables other than water.

So opening night after the big shots like the Minister for Culture and the Museum Director and whoever have given speeches and the invited guests are all walking around looking at everything - the place is full mind you - this well dressed older man is among the crowd looking at the large kitchen knives on my table. Suddenly he reaches out and picks one up, blade length almost 8 inches and 2 inches wide, and throws the knife about 6 feet high, spinning, up into the air above the table. As it falls back down he catches it by (thank God) the grip right before it hits the table and looks at me with a shit eating grin on his face. Everybody else looking at my table are standing there with their mouths hanging open. I managed to say, "Put that down!" while just avoiding throwing up. The idiot made a hasty exit before I could call over any of the museum guards. Kind of ruined the evening for me... but at least I didn't have him running around spraying blood all over the floor. I ended up putting everything under plexiglass so nobody could just pick up a knife.
 
Kevin Wilkins said:
Many years ago I did a Christmas Art and Crafts show held in the courtyard of the German History Museum here in Berlin. All the exhibitors were warned that the stone floor was not sealed and anybody who spilled anything on it would have to pay and for this reason you were not allowed anything to drink at the tables other than water.

So opening night after the big shots like the Minister for Culture and the Museum Director and whoever have given speeches and the invited guests are all walking around looking at everything - the place is full mind you - this well dressed older man is among the crowd looking at the large kitchen knives on my table. Suddenly he reaches out and picks one up, blade length almost 8 inches and 2 inches wide, and throws the knife about 6 feet high, spinning, up into the air above the table. As it falls back down he catches it by (thank God) the grip right before it hits the table and looks at me with a shit eating grin on his face. Everybody else looking at my table are standing there with their mouths hanging open. I managed to say, "Put that down!" while just avoiding throwing up. The idiot made a hasty exit before I could call over any of the museum guards. Kind of ruined the evening for me... but at least I didn't have him running around spraying blood all over the floor. I ended up putting everything under plexiglass so nobody could just pick up a knife.
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Never understood the grabby types who handle things like they own them... even somewhere like a flea market I approach politely, handle gently and place it back down with care.
 
Common sense and.common courtesy are things of the past for most of our species it seems......

A good open handed slap to the back of the empty brain case might help and would definitely HELP ME feel better.....😉
 
DeadPineKnives said:
Taking notes from this thread...

If I ever attend a show, I'll be bringing my knives in a locked case, prices clearly on display in large numbers, and a sign that says "RAZOR SHARP BLADES, ASK TO HANDLE, NO HAGGLING."
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I have my first in person craft show coming up in September and already had this planned, even before this thread existed.

And a little paper to go with each knife about these not being gas station knives to pry and loosen screws with once you own them.
 
Here's a weird one I have noticed among non knife people whenever I had allowed them to handle a knife with its molded sheath. Almost without fail, after they have taken the knife out of the sheath to have a look, they will try to put it back with the blade oriented correctly, but stop to second guess themselves, and then turn the knife upside down before trying to put it the rest of the way back in. It boggles my mind that they almost all have the instinct to put it back correctly, only to then mess it up.

Needless to say, I don't let them handle the knife and sheath any more.
 
I have had several fillet knives pierce the sheath by people who don't know how to sheath a knife. One lady cut her hand while trying to push it harder when it would only go half in. It was just a poke ... luckily. She bought the knife and damaged sheath. I offered a new sheath but she said it was OK.

In sword training, you may spend as much as a year learning to sheath and unsheath a sword before you ever get to cut anything with it. This is Iaido (not Iaito).
 
David Mary said:
Here's a weird one I have noticed among non knife people whenever I had allowed them to handle a knife with its molded sheath. Almost without fail, after they have taken the knife out of the sheath to have a look, they will try to put it back with the blade oriented correctly, but stop to second guess themselves, and then turn the knife upside down before trying to put it the rest of the way back in. It boggles my mind that they almost all have the instinct to put it back correctly, only to then mess it up.

Needless to say, I don't let them handle the knife and sheath any more.
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I think there's an allegory in there
 
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