Not be a jerk...

The sad thing is that there's probably a lot of people reading this thread who agree with me. But, as usually happens, a few mods have jumped in and picked sides, basically preventing anyone from agreeing with me. And then Cougar Allen--like he always does--decides to jump in, too, of course only when it's clear that that's the "safe" thing to do with the way the thread is heading. Think I care? I don't.

Want me to stop commenting in this thread? Wish granted. Happy holidays to you all.
 
Magnaminous_G said:
The sad thing is that there's probably a lot of people reading this thread who agree with me. But, as usually happens, a few mods have jumped in and picked sides, basically preventing anyone from agreeing with me. And then Cougar Allen--like he always does--decides to jump in, too, of course only when it's clear that that's the "safe" thing to do with the way the thread is heading. Think I care? I don't.

Want me to stop commenting in this thread? Wish granted. Happy holidays to you all.
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I'm also one of 'those people' who let others in line ahead of me. I also stop short and allow a car out on to the road from a driveway if I'm going to block them when stopping for a light.

I really don't see how I'm inconveniencing anyone else in the process. If someone behind me complained, I would either invite them to relocate ahead of me, or I would just step out of line. I have done both in the past.
 
I have dressed in my uniform for the toys for tots, and in Apr I am doing a 26 mile ruck march for paws and stripes.
 
My wife works at a large retailer.

Two days before Christmas, she noticed an envelope on the ground at her store, and she picked it up.

There was $3000 cash in the envelope.

She put it in her office and waited for someone to come to claim it.

About an hour later a couple came into the store, the woman in tears and hysterical. They asked if anyone had found an envelope of money.

Talk about making someone's day! The couple had been in the store shopping and getting ready to leave on a vacation trip, and that was the money they had saved for the trip.

I try to have faith in the human race.

I like to do little things, but I don't like to talk about them. I do believe that with all things, you get back what you put in.

best regards -

mqqn
 
fantastic stuff guys, and thats what im talking about.

take the time to do something nice, its doesn't have any thing major, and chances are, someone will be pissed or jealous:rolleyes:

but the point is, it was the right thing to do, the point is, i helped someone, as did all of you, and then, even after someone got pissed, they got a free breakfast, sorry to make you wait an extra 30 seconds (literally) :D
 
Magnaminous_G said:
A great thread? It's a thread that pretends to be about showing consideration and kindness, but really the OP wants to vent at a woman because she was upset that he let someone else cut in line in front of everybody. She had every right to be upset. The OP even hints that she's a "jerk" in the thread title. I'm just calling a spade a spade.

EDIT: I'll repeat --> I'm all about us all being kinder to each other! But the message is wrong: you shouldn't be kind to one person by inconveniencing someone else.
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Have you ever been in line at the grocery store and you or your wife forgot something and one of you decided to go fetch the loaf of bread or whatever? Nowadays, when you come back to the line with that item...more often than not...people begin to give you the hairy eyeball...as if you are somehow "cutting in line" or something.

The point Fonly is desperately trying to make is...if everyone would calm down, the world would most likely be a much better place.

I totally changed jobs a year ago and a lot of my work is with elderly and disabled people now. So, I get to do nice things almost every day I work and it makes one feel better.

Then...I...see...this...stuff... 8-)
 
Being a jerk is easy. Not being a jerk is a bit harder sometimes. Displaying patience and helpfulness to the old and handicapped is one good example. One can huff and fume at the old lady in line in front of them at the checkout who waits untill her purchase is totalled to begin digging in her purse for her cash or checkbook, or one can smile and wink at the cashier to let them know you understand and have no problem with it. They deal with this day in and day out and surely feel some frustration, but you can lighten things for them with a simple gesture. I have similar patience for old folks on the road or walking through a store. Not everyone does though. But by degrees, we can each make the world a little bit better place.
 
Great thread.


You guys should check out this website, It has some great stories of people helping others. www.helpothers.org


Its nice to know there are still good people out there willing to help each other:thumbup:.
 
Codger_64 said:
Being a jerk is easy. Not being a jerk is a bit harder sometimes. Displaying patience and helpfulness to the old and handicapped is one good example. One can huff and fume at the old lady in line in front of them at the checkout who waits untill her purchase is totalled to begin digging in her purse for her cash or checkbook, or one can smile and wink at the cashier to let them know you understand and have no problem with it. They deal with this day in and day out and surely feel some frustration, but you can lighten things for them with a simple gesture. I have similar patience for old folks on the road or walking through a store. Not everyone does though. But by degrees, we can each make the world a little bit better place.
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You're right. I used to fume and get mad and then one day I thought to myself "I'm an A-hole". I calmed down, and made a real effort to relax about things like that and it really worked. I let people in in traffic, and don't think I'm hurting anybody behind me, frankly. If they are coming out of a parking lot onto a road or something its not like they are trying to "cut" in line (although I still get mad when someone passes me in a closed traffic lane and then tries to jump in right at a barrier--to me that's cutting in line!)
 
Magnaminous_G said:
Well, exactly how the OP did it. When there's a line of 100 people with busy lives waiting behind you, if you then go and let someone else cut ahead of you, then voila... you've forced 100 people to be kind to someone. Another way of looking at it is that you've been kind to -99 people (kind to 1, unkind to 100).
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Jeez still trolling your sad personal opinion contrary to what is a heartwarming compassionate thread. Right after your kind glove giving....if it happened.

Let it go and open your own thread on the rules and limitations and guidelines to being a good samaritan as YOU perceive it.
That should make for some good reading and probably develop into a cautionary tale about self serving callousness.

I volunteered 3 long saturday afternoons before christmas at a pet smart dressed as santa this year. My wife volunteers for the cat shelter that pet smart donates a small glassed off section for them with cages and a play room for adoption.

Edit......Dang too late, Mag...G finally huffed off the thread before my post but methinks he will still visit from under the bridge quietly and indignantly.

Was a lot of fun having people and their pets/kids take pictures that we printed off with cheap frames for donations. Lots of smiles and memories for a first time santa. We were able to adopt out 7 cats as well while I was there.
 
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saw a car parked on side of the road , thought it looked odd ... saw an old gent looking 70+ walking toward town .... about 100km away .... took him back to his car , put both my spare cans of fuel into it for him , got him going and seen him off safely , saw him again at the next servo , trying to talk the manager into giving him credit ... I told him mate , just go fill ya tank , Ill get it for you .
I dont know why I did it , but I liked his car , he reminded me of my own late grandfather ,proud old man totally unused to having to ask for help let alone beg credit . Seemed wrong to leave him in a hard spot when it was so easy to fix it for him .

Old guy had tears in his eyes when he shook my hand as we left . Servo manager told me I was mad helping people I dont even know .

Changed a wheel for a girl who was scared silly after nearly wiping her car out when she had a blow out .

busted 3 wheel studs and was in a bad spot in a stange town where I knew no one ... the guys at auto one in castlemain vic went way above and beyond to get my old truck fixed for me .

While its a hellof a lot of good feeling to help out other people who are in a spot , its a dam good feeling too to get helped whenyoure in a jam yourself .
 
Magnaminous_G said:
Well, exactly how the OP did it. When there's a line of 100 people with busy lives waiting behind you, if you then go and let someone else cut ahead of you, then voila... you've forced 100 people to be kind to someone. Another way of looking at it is that you've been kind to -99 people (kind to 1, unkind to 100).
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I have done something like that , in traffic backed up to hell at a nasty set of lights , a small car trying to join the traffic but no one allowing a gap for it to do so , I figured if it was unlucky enough to be still stuck when I got there Id let it in , the car showed P plates , a nervous looking young girl was driving , I waved her in , the smile she gave me and the look of relief on her face when she got in was totally worth it

the guys behind me I forced to wait ? I dont give a dam ... I had a pretty chick smile at me ... they didnt :P sucks to be them , I forced em to wait AND got a smile , at their expense .
 
Fonly, I love this thread first of all. Thanks a lot for starting it. Reading through it has made me feel quite good, apart from the continual posts obviously motivated by a petty sense of pridefulness by one forumite. To this person I would like to say, stop trying to prove your point. I'm sure many people see your point and might even agree with it, theoretically. But this thread is clearly about doing the right thing, and defending yourself/point is not in my mind the right thing in this instance.

Owning and operating a retail/service business, I have the opportunity to act kindly to many people often. I find that the kinder and more generously I treat people who walk through the door, the better off I become; emotionally and financially.

I don't treat people kindly because I want to gain emotional or finanicial security, there simply is no other way for me to approach it. I could not go through life as an angry, disdainful, impatient and/or manipulative person because it's not in my character. And for that, I feel truly blessed. I feel pity for those who do go through life allowing these traits to rule them, and Fonly's elegance in footing the bill for the lady's meal is a good lesson for those of us who care to teach those who don't quite get it.

By the way, 'Pay it Forward' is a MUCH better book, than a movie.
 
Since this one is still going, I have to brag about my wife, and how she changed me. I had watch the kid duty and on vacation for Christmas break. It was about 7:30 AM last Thursday. I was still asleep or getting ready to sip coffee and partake in some whine and cheese, when my wife calls me, "Honeeeeey". I knew that meant I was going to get out of bed. She saw a woman with a flat tire, across the freeway. She turned around and saw that the woman needed help. It was 2 miles from the house, so I loaded up the floor jack, my socket set (I have a long breaker bar on a hinge that I prefer over star lug nut wrenches). I saw them across the way accompanied by a CHP officer, and changed her tire in about 10 minutes or so. Yes, I brought my jack stand!!! My wife was so proud of me, that I came without whining. I asked my wife if the woman had enough money for a tire for these stupid donuts are no good but to get you to a tire store. The woman apparently did not, so I emptied my wallet, about 25, and the wifey did too. I think we came up with enough for a cheapie retread. The woman started to cry, it was payment enough for us. I knew my day was going to be a good one, regardless if I had only cold coffee now to drink.
 
My wife is one of the kindest people I know. She has given money to strangers a few times that I know of. In my own case, I knew a young guy named Dane, & used to talk with him at a coffee shop. He died last winter, and his girl friend (She's 18) needed 200 bucks to get her car fixed so she could go to her job. I had the money to spare, gave her the money and felt good that I could do something for her, & hopefully Dane was looking down and saw that I helped her out.
 
Shann said:
... (although I still get mad when someone passes me in a closed traffic lane and then tries to jump in right at a barrier--to me that's cutting in line!)
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Hahaha! I got over the "cutting in line" bit back in the third grade when Tommy cut in at the water fountain and Bobby gave him a "dixie head pat" that split his lip on the splash guard and everyone grossed out over the bloody water fountain, so nobody got a drink. Every time someone cuts in front of me in traffic I remember that and smile. Invariably, I will be right behind or next to them at the next red light. Of course I am from a rural area and have been told that I drive like an old woman because I refuse to speed.
 
guys, I am so impressed with this thread. Its showed exactly what I have been trying to do, I have lived a short life in terms of years on this earth, but I have also had much loss in my life.

It just had me thinking that day, Its nice to know I wasn't the only one :thumbup:

Thats how I felt, I wasn't feeling the best, however, I was sure so were other people with that same feeling, taking that few seconds to help someone out should be a regular action, its just not in this day and age, everything is at a cost....

But good on you guys, keep this going if we can, its a fantastic read.:thumbup:
 
Fonly said:
guys, I am so impressed with this thread. Its showed exactly what I have been trying to do, I have lived a short life in terms of years on this earth, but I have also had much loss in my life.

It just had me thinking that day, Its nice to know I wasn't the only one :thumbup:

Thats how I felt, I wasn't feeling the best, however, I was sure so were other people with that same feeling, taking that few seconds to help someone out should be a regular action, its just not in this day and age, everything is at a cost....

But good on you guys, keep this going if we can, its a fantastic read.:thumbup:
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It is worth its weight in bacon yup.
 
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