Official RSVP for CPK shindig

I forgot to mention. Since last year, the property beside mine has been purchased and the new owner cut down all the damn trees and built a freaking house in it. So we no longer have quite as much privacy as we used to have. Take this opportunity to pee in the woods. If you see them out there taking out the trash while you're peeing, remember to make eye contact.

Nothing feels as good as pissing outdoors while making someone uncomfortable with long distance eye contact..............except for doing that AND barking at them a few times while staring harder.
 
I would love to chop some stuff and drink a bunch of beer with you all! Unfortunately, I can’t do it this year. I will definitely be drinking some beer that night though!!! Maybe I can chop a few logs at my house.
 
Are you doing the hot, soapy enema clinic again for the shindig, this year?


Seemed excessive, after the unsalted butter stick eating competition, but I suppose it makes about as much sense as your rock-paper-scissors did…



….wwwwhhhhooooOOOOOOOOOSSSSHHHHHhhhhhhh…..
 
Are you doing the hot, soapy enema clinic again for the shindig, this year?


Seemed excessive, after the unsalted butter stick eating competition, but I suppose it makes about as much sense as your rock-paper-scissors did…



….wwwwhhhhooooOOOOOOOOOSSSSHHHHHhhhhhhh…..

That wasn't unsalted butter

That was not an eating competition, that was an intervention involving you and butter.

That was not a hot soapy enema clinic, that was mace

She wouldn't have sprayed it up your ass if you would have stopped trying to do your Richard Nixon impression like that. Nobody likes that.
 
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