-
The BladeForums.com 2024 Traditional Knife is ready to order! See this thread for details: https://www.bladeforums.com/threads/bladeforums-2024-traditional-knife.2003187/
Price is$300$250 ea (shipped within CONUS). If you live outside the US, I will contact you after your order for extra shipping charges.
Order here: https://www.bladeforums.com/help/2024-traditional/ - Order as many as you like, we have plenty.
Some Sexy Photos Of Myself To Promote BFC. (Warning: Topless Nudity Involved!)
- Thread starter Lorena Bobbitski
- Start date
- Joined
- Dec 17, 1999
- Messages
- 35
DONNA!!!!!! HIIIIIIIIIIYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!
I didn't bother to reall of the the MAN-ANIMALS replies because I just KNEW they'd be climbing over themselves to try and win my heart!
I am SO used to that, Girlfriend![/b]
Don't worry about hubby. I would NEVER have anything to do with him... at least not unless YOU'RE involved!
:::::giggle-giggle:::
Oh, I CAN'T Believe I just said that!
:::::giggle-giggle:::
So, that's enough talk about me.
What do you think of my new hair color?
Oh, and I finally found a way to spend all that money from selling my toenails to internet perverts. (Thanks for letting me use your picture for my ad!) and I decided to have my teeth fixed! They look 500% better already!!!
Well, that's enough talking about me.... let's talk about YOU!
How do you think my boob-job came out? Personally, I think that the doctor shouldn't have made them so big.. after all, I have enough men chasing me as it is!
::::giggle-giggle::::
Well, I better run along now. I think my order for the Red Cha-Cha Heels finally came in at the Thrift Store!!!
Ta-ta!
L
PS - Guys, thank you for all of your kind words. I read them all (well, I read a little... mostly what me and Donna wrote) and am so THRILLED that you worship me!!
Look forward to new pictures featuring my Red Cha-Cha Heels!!! I haven't clipped my toenails in MONTHS, so they'll be especially sexy as they curl over the end of the shoes!
G'bye Boys!
kiss-kiss!!
I didn't bother to reall of the the MAN-ANIMALS replies because I just KNEW they'd be climbing over themselves to try and win my heart!
I am SO used to that, Girlfriend![/b]
Don't worry about hubby. I would NEVER have anything to do with him... at least not unless YOU'RE involved!
:::::giggle-giggle:::
Oh, I CAN'T Believe I just said that!
:::::giggle-giggle:::
So, that's enough talk about me.
What do you think of my new hair color?
Oh, and I finally found a way to spend all that money from selling my toenails to internet perverts. (Thanks for letting me use your picture for my ad!) and I decided to have my teeth fixed! They look 500% better already!!!
Well, that's enough talking about me.... let's talk about YOU!
How do you think my boob-job came out? Personally, I think that the doctor shouldn't have made them so big.. after all, I have enough men chasing me as it is!
::::giggle-giggle::::
Well, I better run along now. I think my order for the Red Cha-Cha Heels finally came in at the Thrift Store!!!
Ta-ta!
L
PS - Guys, thank you for all of your kind words. I read them all (well, I read a little... mostly what me and Donna wrote) and am so THRILLED that you worship me!!
Look forward to new pictures featuring my Red Cha-Cha Heels!!! I haven't clipped my toenails in MONTHS, so they'll be especially sexy as they curl over the end of the shoes!
G'bye Boys!
kiss-kiss!!
- Joined
- Nov 11, 1999
- Messages
- 398
Lorena,
I thought I was jealous of you before, but after seeing those nude pics I have decided that I really hate my body.
Cursed be my 36-24-36, 110 pound figure with double D breasts.
Cursed be my flat tummy and long slender legs.
Lorenna, I am so mad at myself, I have tried and tried to add extra inches to my belly and it just will not budge, or should I say bulge in the least.
Your teeth look great--are those gold fillings? I am sure they are. What sparkle they add to your smile. And yes, Lorena, you look stunning as a blonde. You just have one of those faces where you can wear any hair color or any style and you will still be beautiful.
I have to say that to my dismay my husband already found your new photo and I caught him in the bathroom with it with his pants down. Yes, I hate to admit it, but I caught him wacking off to you again Lorena. He then tried to tell me that it was the thought of you and I together that excited him and I said, "Yea, right, I dont see my pic next to Lorena's." Come to think of it, that doesn't sound like a bad idea -giggle-giggle. I notice how you keep throwing me hints Lorena and I suppose it might not be a bad idea. I am up for trying anything once. Giggle Giggle, I'm blushing, but I have to admit, I have given it thought. They do say that gals know what gals like.Giggle Giggle
Maybe hubby can stay in the bathroom with your picture and I'll lock him in there and throw in some cynide pellets while he pleasures himself. That will get rid of him for a while. In the mean time, why dont you come over for some tea and crumpets. We can make our way to my bedroom, Giggle, Giggle and do you think that you can wear that sexy moo moo over.
Yes, the boob job looks very sexy. They are a tad on the big side, but very natural looking.
I am glad that I showed you that foot fetish site and you were able to make lots of money with your toe nail clippings. I think I might have also found a site where you can sell your underarm and leg hair. Oh and if you have any hair on your ass, female ass hair brings in big dollars. If you have any vaginal warts, those are like owning diamonds those bring in the biggest bucks.
Gosh Lorena look at the effect you have had on men on this board, Stu and Gus, I am sure they have followed behind my husband and I bet that this newest pic will end up at every masterabatorium accross the land.
And not only the effects you have had on men, but on women as well, especially this woman--giggle giggle. I am blushing again. I never thought I could ever entertain such thoughts. Lorena you have brought out a the carpet muncher in me, who I never thought existed.
I thought I was jealous of you before, but after seeing those nude pics I have decided that I really hate my body.
Cursed be my 36-24-36, 110 pound figure with double D breasts.
Cursed be my flat tummy and long slender legs.
Lorenna, I am so mad at myself, I have tried and tried to add extra inches to my belly and it just will not budge, or should I say bulge in the least.
Your teeth look great--are those gold fillings? I am sure they are. What sparkle they add to your smile. And yes, Lorena, you look stunning as a blonde. You just have one of those faces where you can wear any hair color or any style and you will still be beautiful.
I have to say that to my dismay my husband already found your new photo and I caught him in the bathroom with it with his pants down. Yes, I hate to admit it, but I caught him wacking off to you again Lorena. He then tried to tell me that it was the thought of you and I together that excited him and I said, "Yea, right, I dont see my pic next to Lorena's." Come to think of it, that doesn't sound like a bad idea -giggle-giggle. I notice how you keep throwing me hints Lorena and I suppose it might not be a bad idea. I am up for trying anything once. Giggle Giggle, I'm blushing, but I have to admit, I have given it thought. They do say that gals know what gals like.Giggle Giggle
Maybe hubby can stay in the bathroom with your picture and I'll lock him in there and throw in some cynide pellets while he pleasures himself. That will get rid of him for a while. In the mean time, why dont you come over for some tea and crumpets. We can make our way to my bedroom, Giggle, Giggle and do you think that you can wear that sexy moo moo over.
Yes, the boob job looks very sexy. They are a tad on the big side, but very natural looking.
I am glad that I showed you that foot fetish site and you were able to make lots of money with your toe nail clippings. I think I might have also found a site where you can sell your underarm and leg hair. Oh and if you have any hair on your ass, female ass hair brings in big dollars. If you have any vaginal warts, those are like owning diamonds those bring in the biggest bucks.
Gosh Lorena look at the effect you have had on men on this board, Stu and Gus, I am sure they have followed behind my husband and I bet that this newest pic will end up at every masterabatorium accross the land.
And not only the effects you have had on men, but on women as well, especially this woman--giggle giggle. I am blushing again. I never thought I could ever entertain such thoughts. Lorena you have brought out a the carpet muncher in me, who I never thought existed.
- Joined
- Oct 20, 1999
- Messages
- 127
several looonnngg minutes of continuous, helpless, hold-the-belly, tears-down-the-face laughter
oh Lorena, girlfriend. . .
you should know better than to wear THAT hairstyle with your SOG. shame on you. you'll give all us bladegals a bad name.
EVERYone knows you only wear tailored
cuts with a fixed blade--curls require the more creative lines of a custom folder--a darryl ralph for those wild, tossed-in-the-wind-on-my-harley moments; a william henry for those nicole-kidman-to-tea events; perhaps even a baby Sebbie for those tousled-because-i've-been-camping-all-day looks.
i know an EXCELLENT hairdresser in La Jolla, and trust me, girlfriend, you better be getting yo'self in her chair like, YESTERDAY.
silverwingie
laughing so hard i can't even make it through lorena's reply to Donna, let alone anything further down...
oh Lorena, girlfriend. . .
you should know better than to wear THAT hairstyle with your SOG. shame on you. you'll give all us bladegals a bad name.
EVERYone knows you only wear tailored
cuts with a fixed blade--curls require the more creative lines of a custom folder--a darryl ralph for those wild, tossed-in-the-wind-on-my-harley moments; a william henry for those nicole-kidman-to-tea events; perhaps even a baby Sebbie for those tousled-because-i've-been-camping-all-day looks.
i know an EXCELLENT hairdresser in La Jolla, and trust me, girlfriend, you better be getting yo'self in her chair like, YESTERDAY.
silverwingie
laughing so hard i can't even make it through lorena's reply to Donna, let alone anything further down...
- Joined
- Nov 11, 1999
- Messages
- 398
Silverwing,
Did I read your last post right, that you referred to Lorena as "girlfriend?" Does this mean that I will not be her first girl/girl experience? My heart is broken. but I should have known that with someone such a sex siren as Lorena, that I more than likely wouldn't have been her one and only girl experience.
Maybe then you can clearify the hate mail that I just recieved. I am sure it was by a jealous male upset because he cannot have Lorena. He said terrible things such as Lorena is a he/she or she/he. He also said that when I go to munch on her carpet, I am going to get a lollipop in my mouth. Can you tell us of your experience and shut up these jealous males? Or is this too personal for me to ask?
Did I read your last post right, that you referred to Lorena as "girlfriend?" Does this mean that I will not be her first girl/girl experience? My heart is broken. but I should have known that with someone such a sex siren as Lorena, that I more than likely wouldn't have been her one and only girl experience.
Maybe then you can clearify the hate mail that I just recieved. I am sure it was by a jealous male upset because he cannot have Lorena. He said terrible things such as Lorena is a he/she or she/he. He also said that when I go to munch on her carpet, I am going to get a lollipop in my mouth. Can you tell us of your experience and shut up these jealous males? Or is this too personal for me to ask?
HermanKnives
Banned
- Joined
- Aug 11, 1999
- Messages
- 734
i have been rendered speechless
hurllllll!
- Joined
- Sep 21, 1999
- Messages
- 1,819
Man, am I ever regretting taking those pictures of Lorena!
You guys are BRUTAL at me!
I'm sobbing like a uhhh... someone that's sobbing alot!
Lorena, the next time you want pictures of yourself, hire someone that nobody at BFC knows, ok? Then they can all complain about him and my sensitive psyche won't be so damaged!
Disco and Guy, you're welcome to her! I allowed her to stay here only because I'd met her online and claimed to be a starving attorney that needed a place to stay for a day or so, until her loft in Greenwich Village got painted. Well, that was 3 yers ago, and she followed me to Nevada!
Sure, at first, the sex was great (but hummers left me with a really sore neck for some odd reason) but ever since she decided that bathing was "cruel to bacteria", that's gone out the window!
She's yanking my ear hair as I type... she wants to respond to Donna and Silverwing...
Off to go and...owwwWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
VG
You guys are BRUTAL at me!
I'm sobbing like a uhhh... someone that's sobbing alot!
Lorena, the next time you want pictures of yourself, hire someone that nobody at BFC knows, ok? Then they can all complain about him and my sensitive psyche won't be so damaged!
Disco and Guy, you're welcome to her! I allowed her to stay here only because I'd met her online and claimed to be a starving attorney that needed a place to stay for a day or so, until her loft in Greenwich Village got painted. Well, that was 3 yers ago, and she followed me to Nevada!
Sure, at first, the sex was great (but hummers left me with a really sore neck for some odd reason) but ever since she decided that bathing was "cruel to bacteria", that's gone out the window!
She's yanking my ear hair as I type... she wants to respond to Donna and Silverwing...
Off to go and...owwwWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
VG
- Joined
- Dec 17, 1999
- Messages
- 35
HIIIIIY, DONNA HYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
Don't feel too bad about your body/looks. It's what's INSIDE that counts! Especially what I have in mind!
Just kidding, no I'm not, yes I am, no.
::::giggle-giggle:::::
If you want to really get in shape, I would suggest buying as many Twinkies as possible and sucking out the cream. An IV line would accelerate the desired effects, but I realize that may be a bit difficult. Finding a doctor to treat you without having to spend all your time fawning off his or her advances can prove to be quite distracting when all you want is some help in shaping up.
Then again, since it would be YOU and not ME that the doctor would be seeing, he just might prove to be helpfull, in the hopes that you'll soon become a true Goddess, such as myself.
And no, those aren't gold fillings. I had just eaten a Rolex from some guy's wrist at the Casino and forgot to brush my teeth. Well, I should admit that I really don't brush my teeth, so much as suck at whatever is stuck between them whenever I happen to remember to do that.
I want to thank you for those sweet words about my face! You should see me, I am blushing from my scalp to my calloused soles! Tonight, I'll wash my face thoroughly so that you'll have a nice clean place to sit!
::::giggle-giggle::::
Oh, and I should add that YOU have the cutest giggle!!!! Do you see, looks is NOT all that is required to turn me on!
Please tell hubby to stop waxing his carrot without permission. I think that maybe we should leave him OUT of our plans until he calms down. The thought of a masterbatorium addict defiling us causes me to retch. In fact, I just retched and can still tatse the tuna I had for lunch this afternoon... and I mean REAL Tuna, like the kind that comes in a can!
:::giggle-giggle::::
DID YOU SEE WHAT I JUST SAID?
:::::giggle-giggle-giggle:::::
Don't worry about Gus and Disco Stu.... they don't have what I need!
Now Silverwing.... I don't want you to be jealous, but I'm flattered and intrigued by her interest. Don't worry however, I PROMISE, you'll be FIRST!
Love,
L
Silverwing, thank you for the advice re: hairstyle and knifestyle. I knew all of what you told me (doesn't EVERY girl?) but since these pictures were used to promote Blade Forums, I thought that the majority of men would be more interested in my body than in my hair.
Still, you're advice is SOOO appreciated! I think it's just WONDERFUL that us girls can get together and talk about girl things, like how to get in shape, body hair (how to get it to grow in places that normally are unable to grow hair, i.e. palms, soles, knees, etc.) while the men animals talk about their little knives, and how they wish they had bigger ones!
::::giggle-giggle::::retch::::
Sorry, man animals and their "knives" disturb me to no end!
So, Silverwing, let me say that I am quite please to make your aquintance, and feel free to send me your (nude) photo so I have a face/body to go along with the text.
(Don't worry, Donna or Silverwing. I'm only asking for the nude photo so that I may be of assistance to S in case she finds herself in need of a Lorena Makeover!
Tat ta!!!
Giggle
Don't feel too bad about your body/looks. It's what's INSIDE that counts! Especially what I have in mind!
Just kidding, no I'm not, yes I am, no.
::::giggle-giggle:::::
If you want to really get in shape, I would suggest buying as many Twinkies as possible and sucking out the cream. An IV line would accelerate the desired effects, but I realize that may be a bit difficult. Finding a doctor to treat you without having to spend all your time fawning off his or her advances can prove to be quite distracting when all you want is some help in shaping up.
Then again, since it would be YOU and not ME that the doctor would be seeing, he just might prove to be helpfull, in the hopes that you'll soon become a true Goddess, such as myself.
And no, those aren't gold fillings. I had just eaten a Rolex from some guy's wrist at the Casino and forgot to brush my teeth. Well, I should admit that I really don't brush my teeth, so much as suck at whatever is stuck between them whenever I happen to remember to do that.
I want to thank you for those sweet words about my face! You should see me, I am blushing from my scalp to my calloused soles! Tonight, I'll wash my face thoroughly so that you'll have a nice clean place to sit!
::::giggle-giggle::::
Oh, and I should add that YOU have the cutest giggle!!!! Do you see, looks is NOT all that is required to turn me on!
Please tell hubby to stop waxing his carrot without permission. I think that maybe we should leave him OUT of our plans until he calms down. The thought of a masterbatorium addict defiling us causes me to retch. In fact, I just retched and can still tatse the tuna I had for lunch this afternoon... and I mean REAL Tuna, like the kind that comes in a can!
:::giggle-giggle::::
DID YOU SEE WHAT I JUST SAID?
:::::giggle-giggle-giggle:::::
Don't worry about Gus and Disco Stu.... they don't have what I need!
Now Silverwing.... I don't want you to be jealous, but I'm flattered and intrigued by her interest. Don't worry however, I PROMISE, you'll be FIRST!
Love,
L
Silverwing, thank you for the advice re: hairstyle and knifestyle. I knew all of what you told me (doesn't EVERY girl?) but since these pictures were used to promote Blade Forums, I thought that the majority of men would be more interested in my body than in my hair.
Still, you're advice is SOOO appreciated! I think it's just WONDERFUL that us girls can get together and talk about girl things, like how to get in shape, body hair (how to get it to grow in places that normally are unable to grow hair, i.e. palms, soles, knees, etc.) while the men animals talk about their little knives, and how they wish they had bigger ones!
::::giggle-giggle::::retch::::
Sorry, man animals and their "knives" disturb me to no end!
So, Silverwing, let me say that I am quite please to make your aquintance, and feel free to send me your (nude) photo so I have a face/body to go along with the text.
(Don't worry, Donna or Silverwing. I'm only asking for the nude photo so that I may be of assistance to S in case she finds herself in need of a Lorena Makeover!
Tat ta!!!
Giggle
- Joined
- Oct 1, 1999
- Messages
- 6,490
- Joined
- Nov 11, 1999
- Messages
- 398
Phil,
You genius you! My husband is going to get real excited over that picture, that is just what our sex life needed. Phil, you are a miracle worker, I believe you just saved my marriage. I will most definetly keep that picture in the bedroom.
That is if I still have a husband, he has been in that bathroom for a few days now, and there is a funny odor coming out of there. I think I threw in a few too many cynide pellets. Frankly, I think he is dead. I am going to have to figure a way to revive him now. If not, does anyone know a good taxidermist?
Lorena,
You are right, it is wonderful that you, me and Silverwing can talk about girl stuff. You are so right about man animals wanting bigger and bigger knives. But you know us girls might be to blame for that cause if they show up with a real little one--we laugh, make fun of them and go around and tell all of our girlfriends and make fun of them so more, so I think we put the pressure on them to want to have big knives.
Dont ya think?
Maybe all three of us girls can get together for a gal's night out, that will be fun. In more ways than one. Giggle, Giggle.
As for retching, I have to say that I dont have that problem, but I do have a little problem called reflux, This is when you are sitting at a table, or shopping in a store and for no apparent reason you blow lunch i.e. hurl. One night while my husband and I were kissing passionatly, I hurled. Right into his mouth too! What a mess. His eyes near popped out of his head and then I thought he was going to gag to death cause he wasn't expecting the dinner I had earlier forced into his mouth like that. He said that the only good thing about it is at least I ate his favorite food. We cooked up some of the rodent legs and tails that the cat dragged in over a few months. Hubby was so greatful that I cooked them, that even when I hurled the already digested variety back into his mouth, he savored the taste. So I happened to have lucked out there, otherwise he would have been pretty upset. I just thought I would let you know, some people get real annoyed, and at other times it has caused a chain reaction. I've been in a room of people where after I hurl everyone in the room hurls one after the other. Kind of like if one person yawns, everyone else must yawn. It can get to be a problem at times, so I thought I would warn you gals.
Look forward to hearing from you again,
You genius you! My husband is going to get real excited over that picture, that is just what our sex life needed. Phil, you are a miracle worker, I believe you just saved my marriage. I will most definetly keep that picture in the bedroom.
Lorena,
You are right, it is wonderful that you, me and Silverwing can talk about girl stuff. You are so right about man animals wanting bigger and bigger knives. But you know us girls might be to blame for that cause if they show up with a real little one--we laugh, make fun of them and go around and tell all of our girlfriends and make fun of them so more, so I think we put the pressure on them to want to have big knives.
Dont ya think?
Maybe all three of us girls can get together for a gal's night out, that will be fun. In more ways than one. Giggle, Giggle.
As for retching, I have to say that I dont have that problem, but I do have a little problem called reflux, This is when you are sitting at a table, or shopping in a store and for no apparent reason you blow lunch i.e. hurl. One night while my husband and I were kissing passionatly, I hurled. Right into his mouth too! What a mess. His eyes near popped out of his head and then I thought he was going to gag to death cause he wasn't expecting the dinner I had earlier forced into his mouth like that. He said that the only good thing about it is at least I ate his favorite food. We cooked up some of the rodent legs and tails that the cat dragged in over a few months. Hubby was so greatful that I cooked them, that even when I hurled the already digested variety back into his mouth, he savored the taste. So I happened to have lucked out there, otherwise he would have been pretty upset. I just thought I would let you know, some people get real annoyed, and at other times it has caused a chain reaction. I've been in a room of people where after I hurl everyone in the room hurls one after the other. Kind of like if one person yawns, everyone else must yawn. It can get to be a problem at times, so I thought I would warn you gals.
Look forward to hearing from you again,
- Joined
- Nov 11, 1999
- Messages
- 398
Bayani,
I didn't know you traveled these parts? I think the major doses of thorazine and shock treatment might do the trick. Lorena is real good at administering those, she is particualarly fond of electrical wiring attached to human flesh.
BTW, did you see Phil's picture of the new and improved me?
E-Wok,
As for Allison, she looks likea good candidate for a Lorena makeover. Lorena just loves to help the less fortunate like that, I know she has greatly helped me.
I didn't know you traveled these parts? I think the major doses of thorazine and shock treatment might do the trick. Lorena is real good at administering those, she is particualarly fond of electrical wiring attached to human flesh.
BTW, did you see Phil's picture of the new and improved me?
E-Wok,
As for Allison, she looks likea good candidate for a Lorena makeover. Lorena just loves to help the less fortunate like that, I know she has greatly helped me.