- Joined
- Aug 30, 2007
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Myal, I've been sitting here reading this whole thread for a while now and it has brought back a lot of feelings and stirred many more. My best friend, Joel, was like a brother to myself and my real brother. We were inseparable.
When my brother died, Joel starting having trouble. It wasn't just from my brother's death, but he had also been doing some drugs here and there. We all were back then. Joel a little more than me. My brother's death must have just been enough to push his mind over the edge.
It progressed quickly and soon Joel was unable to function normally. He was constantly talking to people who weren't there and accusing everybody of broadcasting their voices into his head and everyone being in on some sort of conspiracy. It all REALLY seemed like some sort of scene from a movie all the time. The only person that he trusted was me. He said that my voice was in his head too, but mine was the only one that kept telling him it was ok and not to listen to the others. I saw him be completely broken down to nothing. Eventually, knowing that I couldn't convince him to go to the hospital, I signed some things saying that he was crazy and a danger to himself and others. It was the only thing I could do to get him into a hospital. The police came and picked him up. When he got to the hospital, he told them everything they needed to hear, that someone had played a cruel trick on him and falsely done this to him and made up a story of what he did to them that they would retaliate like this. They released him after a few hours. He walked all the way from the hospital to my house. (not a short walk) and woke me up by knocking on my window. I let him in the house and he told me that someone had called the police on him and told them he was crazy. Obviously they hadn't told him it was me. I told him that I had done it. I explained to him everything that I saw in great detail and that even though he might not understand why at the time, that I knew I was doing what was best for him. Luckily he trusted me. He asked, "do you really think it's in my head and that I have to go to the hospital?" I said, "yes. You know I would never put you in a situation like that unless it was to save your life." He said, "ok. will you take me back tomorrow? I'll tell them everything."
The next day, I took him to the hospital and he told them what was going on. They kept him for a few weeks. I went there to visit him as often as I could. While I was there, I saw a lot of the things you've described. Not to the extent you've stated, but there was certainly some things that I didn't agree with. The things that CaptInsano said definitely give me a little more insight into some of the reason behind it. It doesn't make it any easier to see a loved one go through it and being treated that way in the scared and vulnerable state they're in. When they released Joel, they told him that because this had started, it would be part of his life forever and always be something he would have to deal with through medication and talking about it. It took him a little over a year to come back to close to his old self. Hell never be the same, but I attribute that more to him changing normally in addition to going through the ordeal. For the past several years he has been just fine. He reached a point a long time ago where he no longer needed medication and is completely in control of himself and his life. He also joined the Army and has done better than most of the guys there, younger than himself, no doubt in part due to having gone through what he has and developing a mental toughness that you absolutely can not break.
Sometimes, when we're sitting around having beers or talking about old times, he'll talk about everything that happened and thank me again for being the one that wouldn't abandon him no matter what. Even though we weren't born of the same mom and dad, we're brothers.
While reading your thread, I couldn't help but think about all of this, and then apply it to my wife. What would it be like if it was her instead of Joel. The very thought of that is almost enough to make me lose my sh@t and have a cry fest right here. It breaks my heart to think about seeing my wife go through that, even on a smaller scale. I truly feel for you and her and hope that you guys get through this ok. You're a real good guy for sticking with her no matter what. It's too easy these days for people to cut bait and pack it in. Unfortunately most people don't find that out until they are the ones with backs being turned to them. All my best to you and her. If there's ever anything any of us can do and it's within our capacity, just ask. You've got some people here who have been in a similar place. Prayers.
Dylan
When my brother died, Joel starting having trouble. It wasn't just from my brother's death, but he had also been doing some drugs here and there. We all were back then. Joel a little more than me. My brother's death must have just been enough to push his mind over the edge.
It progressed quickly and soon Joel was unable to function normally. He was constantly talking to people who weren't there and accusing everybody of broadcasting their voices into his head and everyone being in on some sort of conspiracy. It all REALLY seemed like some sort of scene from a movie all the time. The only person that he trusted was me. He said that my voice was in his head too, but mine was the only one that kept telling him it was ok and not to listen to the others. I saw him be completely broken down to nothing. Eventually, knowing that I couldn't convince him to go to the hospital, I signed some things saying that he was crazy and a danger to himself and others. It was the only thing I could do to get him into a hospital. The police came and picked him up. When he got to the hospital, he told them everything they needed to hear, that someone had played a cruel trick on him and falsely done this to him and made up a story of what he did to them that they would retaliate like this. They released him after a few hours. He walked all the way from the hospital to my house. (not a short walk) and woke me up by knocking on my window. I let him in the house and he told me that someone had called the police on him and told them he was crazy. Obviously they hadn't told him it was me. I told him that I had done it. I explained to him everything that I saw in great detail and that even though he might not understand why at the time, that I knew I was doing what was best for him. Luckily he trusted me. He asked, "do you really think it's in my head and that I have to go to the hospital?" I said, "yes. You know I would never put you in a situation like that unless it was to save your life." He said, "ok. will you take me back tomorrow? I'll tell them everything."
The next day, I took him to the hospital and he told them what was going on. They kept him for a few weeks. I went there to visit him as often as I could. While I was there, I saw a lot of the things you've described. Not to the extent you've stated, but there was certainly some things that I didn't agree with. The things that CaptInsano said definitely give me a little more insight into some of the reason behind it. It doesn't make it any easier to see a loved one go through it and being treated that way in the scared and vulnerable state they're in. When they released Joel, they told him that because this had started, it would be part of his life forever and always be something he would have to deal with through medication and talking about it. It took him a little over a year to come back to close to his old self. Hell never be the same, but I attribute that more to him changing normally in addition to going through the ordeal. For the past several years he has been just fine. He reached a point a long time ago where he no longer needed medication and is completely in control of himself and his life. He also joined the Army and has done better than most of the guys there, younger than himself, no doubt in part due to having gone through what he has and developing a mental toughness that you absolutely can not break.
Sometimes, when we're sitting around having beers or talking about old times, he'll talk about everything that happened and thank me again for being the one that wouldn't abandon him no matter what. Even though we weren't born of the same mom and dad, we're brothers.
While reading your thread, I couldn't help but think about all of this, and then apply it to my wife. What would it be like if it was her instead of Joel. The very thought of that is almost enough to make me lose my sh@t and have a cry fest right here. It breaks my heart to think about seeing my wife go through that, even on a smaller scale. I truly feel for you and her and hope that you guys get through this ok. You're a real good guy for sticking with her no matter what. It's too easy these days for people to cut bait and pack it in. Unfortunately most people don't find that out until they are the ones with backs being turned to them. All my best to you and her. If there's ever anything any of us can do and it's within our capacity, just ask. You've got some people here who have been in a similar place. Prayers.
Dylan
