Dealing with a bully

[Shai-Hulud]

...but I'll see if I can convince my brother to stand up to him....

Ironwood, the avenues of contacting parents, teacher, school admin are all the "proper" first steps. They have a 50/50 chance of making a difference and only with *That* bully. Bullies bullly whom they can bully, they rely on fear and pick victims who fear them. Later the bullies get buddies to help them. It is a "system" not an isolated event. Bullies will need a full fledged ass whipping, or jail time eventually, even if they are kids.

Find any Legit martial system that adheres to realistic and applied field expedient self defense training at its core, and encourage the boy to train. If you are reading this and the boy is not training, you are behind the curve already. If they will not teach a kid how to deliver a real ass whipping in self defense, keep looking. If you have to, you train and pass the knowledge down. You will know it when you see it, visit several dojos and watch. "Aikido" is about harmony, and is not the (field expedient and quick to learn) way to deal with bullies, grappling submission BJJ is a valid component, but beating them down quickly (messy/knockut) and hurting body parts is quick to learn and apply.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nUyD0kFsJD8

 

[Chipped Karambit]

Ironwood, the avenues of contacting parents, teacher, school admin are all the "proper" first steps. They have a 50/50 chance of making a difference and only with *That* bully. Bullies bullly whom they can bully, they rely on fear and pick victims who fear them. Later the bullies get buddies to help them. It is a "system" not an isolated event. Bullies will need a full fledged ass whipping, or jail time eventually, even if they are kids.

Find any Legit martial system that adheres to realistic and applied field expedient self defense training at its core, and encourage the boy to train. If you are reading this and the boy is not training, you are behind the curve already. If they will not teach a kid how to deliver a real ass whipping in self defense, keep looking. If you have to, you train and pass the knowledge down. You will know it when you see it, visit several dojos and watch. "Aikido" is about harmony, and is not the (field expedient and quick to learn) way to deal with bullies, grappling submission BJJ is a valid component, but beating them down quickly (messy/knockut) and hurting body parts is quick to learn and apply.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nUyD0kFsJD8

Kajukenbo is a little to much lol (took it for a few years) I suggest you teach him how to hit and where to hit. A solid strike to the nose will stop someone. A nice submission will humiliate them

 

[schoolbus]

... Also you can really strike the fear of god in to the bully but you turn in to a bully as well so you gotta be careful of that. if you want him to protect himself, you can always tell him to kick or punch the bully as hard as he can in the nuts; in a street fight, there are no rules. eye gouge, nut punch/kick, biting, hair pulling is all good! Nothing says loving like having to amputate a nut cuz it got so swollen and inflammed that it cant be saved. Also, tell him to try to bite him in the nuts if he has to.

That won't work if the bully doesn't believe in a god. And I hope you are joking about attacking or biting someones nuts. There are some things you just shouldn't do to a guy. Personally I wouldn't be able to respect a person if I knew they used such dirty tactics in a fight. Just my 2 cents.

 

[rmoore911]

That won't work if the bully doesn't believe in a god. And I hope you are joking about attacking or biting someones nuts. There are some things you just shouldn't do to a guy. Personally I wouldn't be able to respect a person if I knew they used such dirty tactics in a fight. Just my 2 cents.

Have fun not respecting someone like me then. There are on rules in a fight. I will punch you in the throat, i will kick you in the balls, I'll try to remove your scalp without the aid of a bladed weapon in a fight. If someone is trying to commit physical harm to me, then I will use just about every means to defend myself and make sure the other person thinks 3 or 4 times before they try that with another person.

 

[<Flux>]

yes and no, your example is a group of friends, nobody was really a bully in that group and they could leave and not be fked with if they wanted. this dudes brother is getting singled out and harrassed so your example does not apply. if everyone followed your advice, rapist would be doing nothing wrong cuz you can't rape the willing right?

I would argue that the dynamic is the same, regardless of the context. My example may not directly relate to this situation, but I believe that the underlying concept is applicable.

The point is that bullies feed on the satisfaction of knowing that they are successful in affecting their victim. By showing indifference to the bully's harassment, you eliminate their motivation.

I wish I had more time to discuss the psychology of bullies.

Once again, I really hope that this situation is resolved and hope for a positive outcome.

 

[44magnumb]

I didn't have time to read through everyone's responses, just the first 2 1/2 pages or so, but I think there's one more option to explore if the school, the bullies parents, and your brother doesn't want to resort to a physical altercation. I don't know how large the school is he attends, but typically there is a large student who is friendly but also protective of his friends, but he himself is not a bully. He will intervene when his friends are in trouble though. He may, or may not, be a jock but most likely he may be. If your brother could befriend someone like that whom the bully is fearful of, not only will he have made a new friend, he'll have a bodyguard.

 

[Jaxx]

There is good advice and bad advice on this thread...which is what you can expect from asking a question like this in a knife forum.

I don't really have any to offer, but this... Check the legalities of recording another without their knowledge or consent whether by audio or video or both. Remember that minors (juveniles) cannot give their consent without a legal guardian or advocate present. The laws (both criminal and civil) on this vary quite a bit from state to state. The school may also have policies concerning this. I'd hate to see your brother arrested, or his parents sued or him expelled all because he was trying to stop a bully.

Keep in mind while reading this that I do not have children, but did have my own problems with a bully in grade school... So, as a parent, I would arrange to have a meeting with the school administrators face to face and inform them that it has come to my attention that my child is being bullied. I would tell them that they have the responsibility to put an end to it and if they do not, I will look into self defense training for my child so that he/she may defend him/her self when actions call for it as well as look into what actions against the administrators themselves for allowing this to continue on that I as a parent can pursue. Then I would look into training regardless, but with emphasis on when it is justified. I'd put the ball in their court and put them on the clock. This way, if no action is taken, they cannot argue that they weren't given a chance to stop this when the child in question fights back against his or her bully.

With that said, this topic is really way off topic for this forum. I left it open until now, but I think that you have heard enough different views to get some ideas. Choose wisely on which advice you and your folks decide to use, and I wish you and your little bro the best with this matter.

It's time to close this thread.