Destructive testing services available

R

RX-79G

Joined
Jun 23, 2006
Messages
2,383
As everyone knows, pushing a knife until it breaks is dangerous. Whether it is smacking the spine to get a lock to fail, hammering a pocketknife through a log or using a knife as a step - you can get hurt.


I'm proposing a new business where people who have knives that they want to find out how tough they are send them to my company, where we will break your knife for you.


How it works:

Just send your excellent condition knife and $100 ($95 testing + $5 disposal fee) to me, along with a description of the kind of abuse you'd like your knife destroyed by. We will cash your check, test your knife in our facility and send you a written description of the testing and at what point your knife completely failed and was destroyed.



I'll also be launching a completely unrelated business selling lightly used and like new knives.


Glad to be of service to the knife community.

Photo0013.jpg
 
RX-79G said:
As everyone knows, pushing a knife until it breaks is dangerous. Whether it is smacking the spine to get a lock to fail, hammering a pocketknife through a log or using a knife as a step - you can get hurt.


I'm proposing a new business where people who have knives that they want to find out how tough they are send them to my company, where we will break your knife for you.


How it works:

Just send your excellent condition knife and $100 ($95 testing + $5 disposal fee) to me, along with a description of the kind of abuse you'd like your knife destroyed by. We will cash your check, test your knife in our facility and send you a written description of the testing and at what point your knife completely failed and was destroyed.



I'll also be launching a completely unrelated business selling lightly used and like new knives.
Glad to be of service to the knife community.
Click to expand...

The fact that some people think certain abusive tasks are "normal" is why I don't want to buy anyone's used knives anymore. :D

Sounds like a winning business model though. :p
 
If $100 is too much for some folks, at Stabman's Budget Knife Testing we'll throw knives from the third storey balcony onto concrete for a mere $60. :)
For $75, we'll throw them from the 10th floor (associate's fee involved, hence the higher cost).
And what could be a more realistic test of your knife than that, right?
 
Before sending your knives to RX-79G or Stabman, please send them to me for pre-inspection. The address is as follows:

Blues Bender
223 Shady Lane
Utopia, Earth

I'll make sure your knife can withstand breakage;)

Oh yea...for only $49.95. PayPal only, Conus only, and you must pay an additional 47% for "PayPal fees".
 
Blues Bender said:
Before sending your knives to RX-79G or Stabman, please send them to me for pre-inspection. The address is as follows:

Blues Bender
223 Shady Lane
Utopia, Earth

I'll make sure your knife can withstand breakage;)
Click to expand...

With your rigorous 10 year inspection protocol, right? :D
 
I'll bite. As long as I get accurate measurements in units that matter with a standard deviation of less than 5%.
 
Gazz's Ninety Eight, Knife Consulting Service is G-G-Great! Before you ship your knives to someone above, for only $25 via paypal I will advise you on who best to ship your knives to for testing. Don't get suckered into fancy ads in forums, sort the crap from the poo. I am here to help!

Family business! USA owned and operated since 5:20 PM EST 3-18-2016. Check us out on Facebook! We don't have a page, but you can try to find us!
 
I know you're asking 100.00 but would you consider a heavily used but like new (only the tip is missing) otherwise PERFECT Gerber paraframe and 10.00?
RX-79G said:
As everyone knows, pushing a knife until it breaks is dangerous. Whether it is smacking the spine to get a lock to fail, hammering a pocketknife through a log or using a knife as a step - you can get hurt.


I'm proposing a new business where people who have knives that they want to find out how tough they are send them to my company, where we will break your knife for you.


How it works:

Just send your excellent condition knife and $100 ($95 testing + $5 disposal fee) to me, along with a description of the kind of abuse you'd like your knife destroyed by. We will cash your check, test your knife in our facility and send you a written description of the testing and at what point your knife completely failed and was destroyed.



I'll also be launching a completely unrelated business selling lightly used and like new knives.


Glad to be of service to the knife community.

Photo0013.jpg
Click to expand...
 
shinyedges said:
I know you're asking 100.00 but would you consider a heavily used but like new (only the tip is missing) otherwise PERFECT Gerber paraframe and 10.00?
Click to expand...

Sure, but I guarantee it will be destroyed and disposed of in one test.
 
But can it slice an apple? A destruction test that does not start out with apple slicing, is invalid to me.
 
Insipid Moniker said:
I'll bite. As long as I get accurate measurements in units that matter with a standard deviation of less than 5%.
Click to expand...
Do not listen to these hucksters, at my advanced testing facility we will give you a written report on swiped hotel stationary and provide 99% accurate results based on lumens! This for a mere $125.
 
The Gerber and 10.00 was payment for your services, the blade I want you to destroy is a fat busse ash-1. Break it specifically by batoning LOL
RX-79G said:
Sure, but I guarantee it will be destroyed and disposed of in one test.
Click to expand...
 
This thread is awesome! :thumbup:

Who wants to test my Sebenza?! If it doesn't suffer lock failure, I won't be happy!
 
I was about to send RX-79G a knife to test, but then I read on another forum about a guy that knows his bosses wife's brother who frequents another forum who said that his friends cousins uncle knows RX-79G and that he carries his knives tip down:eek:

Sorry, but there are better people in this world that will test my knife honestly:thumbdn:
 
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