Giveaway! I failed at modding and because.. why not?

A priest, a polar bear and a professional golfer walk into a bar. The bartender says to the priest "Ah crap, is this a joke?"

I'm in for the Kershaw. Thanks.
 
Two highschool buddies are talking before their class starts. First kid says, "Hey man, did you hear someone in our class just came out of the closet?"

The second kid replies, "Nah, who was it?"

First kid says, "Gimme a little kiss and I'll tell you."

I'm in for the Ram. Thanks for the chance!
 
https://c1.staticflickr.com/9/8327/8411544319_c3bfd3b7f8_z.jpg

Check out the link above for a visual representation :).

"Three nazis walk into a BAR."

I would prefer the recon 1, but i have no problem with either one. Which ever I am chosen for I will be happy. Thanks for the opertunity.

Edit to add: well after seeing the post of "a man walking into a bar, ouch." I thought i shoud add my personal story similar to that. When i was little about 4 my dad took me to santa cruz beach, he called me to him he was on the other side of beach because he passed under the boardwalk. So i run to him and BAM! Theres a damn bar just hung right there under the boardwalk at perfect height to clothes line me across the forehead, damn. I agree ouch, that crap hurts.
 
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How do you catch a polar bear? You cut a hole in the ice and surround it with peas, so when the polar bear comes to take a pea you kick him in the ice hole.

I'm in for the voyager, thanks for the chance!
 
A three legged dog walked into a bar and said;

"I'm looking for the man who shot my paw..."

The Recon.
 
Hand on the Bible, the following is a true story (that makes a great joke):

It was a morning like any other. My mom and dad had been sitting at the kitchen table, drinking coffee. My dad went to the bathroom, and when he returned to the kitchen table, my mom said "you smell nice, what are you wearing?" My dad paused a second, looked at her and said "Christ, woman, it's Preparation H"!
 
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Who would win in a knife fight between Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton? Answer.... "Society"

I am in, and would like the Recon!!! ;) thanks for the chance.
 
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I would love a shot at that CS Recon if you would be so kind sir. I have had my fair share of "accidents" while modding or attemping to mod knives. I rehandled an okapi ratchet knife with two aluminum breakers bars and brass1/16 pivot screws. One of my first projects. works pretty well for what I used.
It's fun to mod, some turn out great, others don't.. Live and learn I guess. Kudos.
 
I'd love to have the RAM!
Here's my joke: "Why can't miss piggy count to seventy? Because every time she gets to 69 she gets a little frog in her throat."
Thanks!
 
Pirate walks into a bar with a ships wheel on his belt. Bartender asks, "Hey, what's with that thing on your belt?"

Pirate replies, "Arrr, I don't know, but it's driving me nuts!"

In for the Recon. Thanks!
 
A panda walks into a restaurant. The server comes up and takes his order. She brings out his sandwich, and after eating, the panda stands up and shoots the server. The panda starts to leave and the owner of the restaurant comes up to the panda and asks why would you do that. The panda replies because i'm a panda its what we do, look it up. So the owner goes to the dictionary and looks up panda and reads "A large black and white marsupial who eats shoots and leaves".

Kershaw RAM
 
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A very rich man met a beautiful lady and he decided he wanted to marry her right away. She said, ''But we don't know anything about each other.'' He said,''That's all right, we'll learn about each other as we go along.'' So she consented, and they were married, and went on a honeymoon to a very nice resort. So one morning they were lying by the pool, when he got up off of his towel, climbed up to the 10-meter board and did a two and a half tuck gainer, this followed by a three rotations in jackknife position, where he straightened out and cut the water like a knife. After a few more demonstrations, he came back and lay down on the towel.
''That was incredible!'' she said.
''I used to be an Olympic diving champion. You see, I told you we'd learn more about ourselves as we went along.'' So she got up, jumped in the pool, and started doing laps. After about thirty laps she climbed back out and lay down on her towel hardly out of breath.
''That was incredible!" he said. "Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?''
''No,'' she said, ''I was a hooker in Venice and I worked both sides of the canal.''

Recon, thanks for the chance :)
 
A guy walks into a bar and he had a monkey tagging along. He orders a beer . mean while , the monkey jumps up on the bar and finds a bowl of peanuts..the monkey grabs a nut and sticks it up his butt and then eats it. The monkey repeated this many times. The bartender ask the guy what in the hell is your monkey doing ? The guy said the last time the monkey and I where here he swallowed a pool ball!


I'm in for the Recon...thanks


2 Panther
 
A horse walks up to the bar, when the bartender notices him, he wanders over and says, hey buddy...why the long face?


I'm in for the recon as well, thanks.
 
Knock knock
Whos there?
banana
banana who?

Knock knock
Whos there?
banana
banana who?

Knock knock
Whos there?
banana
banana who?

Knock knock
Whos there?
orange
Orange ya glad I didn't say banana.


In for the RECON 1!!!!
 
How many dead babies does it take to paint a house?
Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

In for the RAM please!
 
A bunch of NFL scouts swarm the underwear aisle of Walmart and demand to speak with the manager. They wanted more wife beaters. Recon 1 please.
 
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