Marriages?

[jsmatos]

The world is filled with people, and may we love them all, but no two loves are alike. I was just thinking last night about how valuable a really good friend is, and knew that I have this incredible store of friends, each of which anyone would be pleased to have *just* that friend in their life. I am so fortunate!

One of the biggest lessons I've learned as a result of my divorce is the importance of friendship. I have a few friendships that extend back to my childhood. You get married when your young and don't necessarily know how to straddle the spouse and the friends in a manner where you find a happy balance. Your marriage becomes a primary focal point- as it should. Friends are there, of course, but they fall into the background. When the marriage was over, my friends were there as if nothing ever changed. It doesn't seem to matter what happens, they're always there for me. Like I said previously, I don't intend on marrying again. I've learned to appreciate the many different types of relationships in my life. I was married for nine years, I'll remain friends with him until the day I die. But, it turns out that the friendship I have with one person in particular, my best friend of 20 years, is more profound than the one I had with my former husband. This isn't because the marriage ended and I'm underrepresenting it's importance. I would never undervalue the significance of that relationship. I just realized that I will never again underestimate the value of the other relationships in my life. In the fallout of my marriage, I learned the one lesson that no one ever taught me. Everyone knows that marriage takes work. Friendships take work too, and more importantly, they deserve it.

Spectre, I'm at the point where I cannot see how someone wouldn't appreciate the pure beauty of my friends. If someone finds them lacking in any way or isn't attracted to them, then clearly they're nuts. LOL

 

[Bri in Chi]

Thanks, Morgane. Boy, did this one get me thinking. In a year and a half Alice and I will celebrate our 40th anniversary. We have had some rough times, the loss of all our parents, a house fire that set us back a bit, work problems, the deaths of 4 beloved dogs over the years, and recently my bout with prostate cancer - to name just a few. I guess we have tested our marriage the way Dave R. tests a new khukri - beat the hell out of and see if it can take it.

 

[Morgane]

This has been a very enjoyable thread for me too. I think that signifigant relationships, even absent, are a great measure of both the individual or society. Sometimes a whole demographic is named after it's marital status.The one even leads to another, in the form of children or other dependents.

Mrs Z and I are relative newcomers at 21 years this month. So it was possible for us to take lessons from both you and the other couples in this thread. It's been very enjoyable to read along the way

 

[Mitchell Knives]

But she and I wonder: How many here do not expect to marry at all?

I don't. I just don't really see it happening. I'm not opposed to getting married, but it doesn't seem likely to me at this point. I'm picky and I'd rather be alone than settle.