Um... they're doing it wrong. First hint is that an appointment needs to be set up prior. Second hint is that the doctors work in a clinic or hospital.
Those impromptu back alley exams...
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Random Thought Thread
- Thread starter Nathan the Machinist
- Start date
Those impromptu back alley exams...
If/when you do wind up with the astronomer looking for Uranus, ask for the Gatorade/Miralax prep. If they try to give you sone stuff called GoLitely, tell them to F### off, and ask for the Gatorade/Miralax. The other stuff literally tastes like slightly greasy sweat.Bob, I’m going to put it off as long as I can. I hear the stuff you have to drink the day before is FAR worse than the procedure.
Women have childbirth. I hear that’s pretty rough. But we have groin shots and that awful procedure.
And GoLitely my ass. I suppose no one would drink shyte labeled GoLikeAWaterfall.
Fonedork
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I had a doctor who gave me a pill that was a tiny camera, it recorded all the way through its journey and broadcasted it wirelessly to a hard drive thing. I thought that tech would replace the traditional colonoscopy, butt I guess I was wrong.
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The stuff they gave me for prep is called Movie Film, it has an explosive ending!
mb>
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Thanks for the laughs. Of course it’s both funny and not.
Heard a comedian the other night. He said the prep made him “chapped.” So his tip was to get some chapstick, but nothing menthol or flavored, just the basic.
His last tip: “Don’t make the same mistake I did. Be sure to throw that tube away.”
Heard a comedian the other night. He said the prep made him “chapped.” So his tip was to get some chapstick, but nothing menthol or flavored, just the basic.
His last tip: “Don’t make the same mistake I did. Be sure to throw that tube away.”
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This subject brings back harrowing memories for me, which are not amusing to me but the heck, we’re a band of brothers in here right? (if you are a sister, you may want to skip this one!)
21 years ago at the then tender age of 35, a specialist had recommended that I ought to go for a colonoscopy procedure. I had great insurance back then so I was thinking like what the heck, right? I mean never mind that over 2 decades ago you were not getting the ultra fine technological advances of today!
This friggin thing was like the octopus arms from that Spyderman movie (No. 3?) whirling and twirling like it was boring for a 2 inch pipe for the department of water!!! Worse even, I was not sedated and the physician went to town on me! At one point it felt like I was in the Alien movie with the creature wanting to pop outta my abdomen area! Once done, I was flatulent for a good half day!
Signed: original #metoo survivor!
21 years ago at the then tender age of 35, a specialist had recommended that I ought to go for a colonoscopy procedure. I had great insurance back then so I was thinking like what the heck, right? I mean never mind that over 2 decades ago you were not getting the ultra fine technological advances of today!
This friggin thing was like the octopus arms from that Spyderman movie (No. 3?) whirling and twirling like it was boring for a 2 inch pipe for the department of water!!! Worse even, I was not sedated and the physician went to town on me! At one point it felt like I was in the Alien movie with the creature wanting to pop outta my abdomen area! Once done, I was flatulent for a good half day!
Signed: original #metoo survivor!
woodysone
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Edge-of-the-seat thriller? Oh wait, that could be messy.The stuff they gave me for prep is called Movie Film, it has an explosive ending!
Everyone knows assless chaps(tick) is the way to goThanks for the laughs. Of course it’s both funny and not.
Heard a comedian the other night. He said the prep made him “chapped.” So his tip was to get some chapstick, but nothing menthol or flavored, just the basic.
His last tip: “Don’t make the same mistake I did. Be sure to throw that tube away.”
- Joined
- Mar 20, 2016
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- 14,010
Nice read Mat! I’m glad you shared and took one for the team.
You're too kind Martin, but I actually took it for the whole frakking LEAGUE!
This was the Doctor, Dr. Otto Octavius:
UffDa
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Not quite. Is that a survive blade? If so, definitely not!
Yeah, it's a GSO 3.5. I just posted it as an example. I agree, Nates's would look better. As I said, I would prefer a clipped point.
I have a GSO 3.5 in 3V. I have used it to cut up a bunch of cardboard boxes when I couldn't find my box cutter. It did a good job and the edge held up well. The handle fits my hand.
IMHO, Survive makes very good knives. As far as Survive's policies and customer care go....no comment.
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You were awake for the Colonoscopy?? I went for & recommend the nighty nighty Shot, unless you have a real desire to watch and listen to the “Fantastic Voyage” for those of you old enough to remember that 60’s movie. As they scope your intestines!
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You were awake for the Colonoscopy?? I went for & recommend the nighty nighty Shot, unless you have a real desire to watch and listen to the “Fantastic Voyage” for those of you old enough to remember that 60’s movie. As they scope your intestines!
Yup, fully awake! I was watching my own insides like Mars Rover was roaming on some alien terrain. Really weird stuff!
tinfoil hat timmy
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If you wake up extra early on weekends you get to sleep in before work all week.
Fonedork
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This would be a great colonoscopy songYou were awake for the Colonoscopy?? I went for & recommend the nighty nighty Shot, unless you have a real desire to watch and listen to the “Fantastic Voyage” for those of you old enough to remember that 60’s movie. As they scope your intestines!
Wait no. Augh I’m deleting that funky song. Jeez, hadn’t listened to it yet...
Mike157
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I’m hesitant to post much about my own experiences with this subject just because it seems like we’re all very close to “too much information”. But, here goes anyway..... and I guess I’m saying this, on a more serious note, because in the past, I’ve had two work associates pass away due to colon cancer. The fight against it was brutal and ugly and they both lost after a year or so. If “screening” helps, I think the temporary discomfort experienced is worth it. I’ve had two colonoscopies, one at 50 and one at 60. I was fully awake for both of them and got to watch the “exploration” on a screen next to me. The procedure itself was not at all painful but I did feel a bit like Matty stated - like an alien was running loose in there. By far the worst part was the the pre-procedure “clean-out” drug I took the first time. That, indeed, screwed my GI tract up something fierce. It took a few days to get back to normal. The second go around was much more mellow and I recovered within the day.
Most have probably seen ads for the “sampler” home test available now. Seems they are a viable alternative in many cases.
Okay, I’m sure that was TMI, I apologize. Back to our rectalular programing.
Mike