What is the dumbest comment someone has made about your knife?

I recently gave a Blur to a friend who always always needs a knife and never owned a quality blade. His excited, girly voice response: "Oh my god, it's made in America"
 
Upon my last package delivery in the mail, my father asks "what is that, another knife? Dont you already have one?"...shit if he only knew, he would shake me down for every last penny I had. I usualy take the liberty of bullshitting him for his own good. " I Only paid 10 bucks for it! They cost 75 new." As far as he knows I picked up my G10 delica for $12 dollars.

My supervisor took notice of my BM H&K 14210 and wanted to know why I carry a rambo knife and if I carry it to stab people.

A buddy asked me to borrow my emerson mini cqc7. I noticed a cheap-o screwdriver in his hand that he must have used to mix paint. So, I naturaly ask if he had plans on using my knife to scrape the dried paint off that sad excuse for a screwdriver. I didnt even dignify him with a response.
 
1. "Why do you carry a knife?" (while I'm cutting open something or they are using the blade for the same)

2. "Why is it so sharp?"

3. "Going to kill anybody with that?"

I usually ignore all the stupid questions now. However, I sometimes still answer #1 with: "Just to piss off idiots that ask those stupid questions."
 
While I was running my knife across a stone, someone asked me," Is that knife sharp?"
 
I worked at the Freeport Knife Co. in Freeport, Maine for 10 years and I heard some doozy's.

"Do you have the knife that Lorena Bobbit/OJ used?" I actually researched that and would show examples.

"That knife would be great for killing 'cans. Afri-cans, Puerto Ri-cans, Mexi-cans...." I actualy heard this more than once and it always really bothered me. I would look at them funny and say; "Ameri-cans?" That usualy gave them the impression that I hated their racist and offensive "joke".

"Japanese steel sucks."

"I can tell you know nothing about knives because you touched that blade."

"I want a 4" lockback. I want it to be made in the USA. I have $20 to spend."

I always got phony balony "spec-ops" guys telling me how they "stabbed an Iraqi in the head" and stuff like that. The funny thing was that the SERE instructors would come down to the store from cold weather training to get knives sharpened and those guy's did NOT have to brag about stabbing people because I got the feeling that they actually did. Those guys were very friendly, but TERRIFYING.
 
"are you sure it's legal to carry that one in Amsterdam?"

someone said to my Fehrman FJ
 
He took it from me to use and ran his finger down the blade. He said it wasn't very sharp when he first opened it only to follow that comment with 'do you have any bandaids?' This when he looked down and saw that his finger was now bleeding. It appears my not so sharp blade cut his finger when he tested it and decided it was not too impressive. :D He conceded that it was sharper than he thought. I admit it was my wood carving knife so it was a deceptive push cutting well stropped edge and not the aggressive saw toothy type I'm sure he was used to. I had been carving that day on the back deck some and had that one on me at the time. If he had not ran his finger down the full length like he did I doubt it would have cut him and if I had had an aggressive edge on it he would have felt the dig in early as it dragged and bit down. When he didn't feel that I guess he kept going and thats when the cut snuck up on him. Cut so cleanly he didn't even realize it did it. Probably didn't even bruise the cells as fine and sharp as it was at the time. I had just re-stropped it.
STR
 
"Whoa now. Don't go stabbing anybody there."

It was a peanut. A little Sears Craftsman peanut made by Camillus. I was using the small pen blade to cut yarn after casting off.
 
ran his finger down the blade

Why would someone do this? If I scrape my finger ACROSS the blade I can feel how sharp it is, but running a finger ALONG the blade is going to cut your finger on anything sharper than a bread knife! I certainly wouldn't run a finger along either blade on my SAK or either blade on my LM Wave or any of my folders or fixed blade knifes - I don't want to bleed just for the fun of it! Of course all those blades I have are pretty sharp so it wouldn't take much to cut my finger.
 
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Why would someone do this? If I scrape my finger ACROSS the blade I can feel how sharp it is, but running a finger ALONG the blade is going to cut your finger on anything sharper than a bread knife! I certainly wouldn't run a finger along either blade on my SAK or either blade on my LM Wave or any of my folders or fixed blade knifes - I don't want to bleed just for the fun of it! Of course all those blades I have are pretty sharp so it would take much to cut my finger.

I have no idea why people do this, but I see it time and time again. My guess is that they did it before on a not-so-sharp knife and didn't get cut? :confused:
 
Pointing to my camp knife (a 4 or 5" fixed-blade clip point), shaking their heads wisely, and saying, "that's in case you need to fight with a bear, right?" I try to explain patiently that my wilderness travel plans generally involve avoiding Gentle Ben rather than going mano-a-mano with him, but I don't think explaining this does much good.

- - - - - - - -

Q. "Why do you carry that thing?"

A: "Because it doesn't have legs so it can't carry itself."

Q. Confused dear-in-headlights stare as I walk away.


_______________________________

"If at first you don't succeed, get a bigger hammer." my dad
 
Dumbest comment I ever was asked in army when we were in forrest, this trooper comes and asks me: Do you have a knife?

I had then autility knife with 7" blade attched to my combat wests left shoulder and right front of his eyes and I had my puukko on my belt. But that guy was not famous of his sharp whit.

2nd most dumbest thing was also in army during explosives excercise when I cut some fuse with my knife, some guy asked: Dude, is your knife legal. I almost dropped my knife. We both happened to carry assault rifles and were just handleing fuses and blast caps for detonating 2 kilo explosives and he was considered if my knife was legal...
 
"That knife would be great for killing 'cans. Afri-cans, Puerto Ri-cans, Mexi-cans...." I actualy heard this more than once and it always really bothered me. I would look at them funny and say; "Ameri-cans?" That usualy gave them the impression that I hated their racist and offensive "joke".

"Japanese steel sucks."

AHAHHAHAHA!! Ohhhhhhh, xenophobic jokes are a real riot! :confused:

Be prepared for the day one of 'em comes back with "Ameri-can't!"

thejamppa said:
We both happened to carry assault rifles and were just handleing fuses and blast caps for detonating 2 kilo explosives and he was considered if my knife was legal...

Geesh! The guy shoulda been excused from service citing "mental unsuitability"!
 
So it's not about statistics and percentages of usage, but what tasks the object is capable of performing and the use of such an object in a situation that does not seem to call for it.

Not to be too picky, but objects are not "capable of performing" any action except lying where they were last placed. Only a conscious entity who makes decisions about what to do with the object can be properly credited (or blamed) for performing an action, or for having the ability to do so. That is what makes the "tool vs. weapon" discussion just a little silly. It is also what makes so many of the statements and questions recorded in this thread so funny.
 
"Are you going to stab someone with that?" - Comment when I was opening my Ladybug Salt.
 
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