What is the dumbest thing you have seen a non-knife person do with a blade?

EChoil said:
A buddy (whom I knew, not well when we departed but realized he was possibly head-injured as the trip unfolded) and I were on the westbound comeback of a lengthy road trip on our Harleys, riding since sunup, when we stopped to eat lunch at a restaurant. Afterward we were at our scooters in the parking lot, rigging for another stretch of road, when he decided he wanted to cut the sleeves off his T-shirt using his Leatherman blade).

I looked over and he was stabbing at the limp sleeves of the T-shirt while holding it--this guy looked like you had given a three-year-old girl a butcher knife and said, "Here, cut this." It was pathetic; looked like he'd NEVER handled a knife before (I'd noticed his odd use of a knife when he ate, too, but just put it down to probably being head-injured).

I walked over, told him he was gonna kill the shirt if he kept doing that, drew my 4" leuku and showed him how to hold the sleeve taught and SLICE it down the seam. Handing the shirt back to him, he started stabbing again, nearly got me and I backed off and went back to my bike in disgust, leaving him to his own methods.​

Next thing I know I hear, "Help me!....Help me!" and I turn around and the guy's holding his arm high in the air where he'd just put the whole blade into the center of his underside forearm and got an artery or two.

Trying to keep this short, I grabbed him and convinced him he wasn't going to die...he's going into shock now...and walked him back into the restaurant which was full of lunchtime crowd and a waiting line. The guy is spewing blood even though I had him keeping pressure on it. I sat him in a chair and told him again he was going to live.

Now, some of the elderly ladies were fainting in the doorway and the wait staff, mostly young girls, were panicking and dropping stuff...I've no idea where the manager was. I know some of the people at tables and booths dropped but I was so busy I don't know how many. So I started trying to direct the waitresses...one calling an ambulance, one to get some ice and towels, one to find the manager, one to assist me with stopping his bleeding, etc, etc...​

He finally passed and fell on the floor before the Fire-paras got there but they arrived pretty quickly and took him to their ambulance. He revived in there, they got it under control and I followed them to the hospital.

After 4 hours in the ER and this guy using every ploy he knew to get hard drugs from every nurse, doctor and candy striper who walked by, he was sutured up, given his painkillers and all was well with him again.

He couldn't ride his scooter until at least morning, so one of the firemen who'd evidently been assigned to aid us that day drove it back to a motel where they had secured two rooms for us.

My buddy crashed til morning the instant he got into the room--toast. Meantime, the firefighters we'd been with that day, who had helped us out TREMENDOUSLY, were riders and showed up at my room about 6:00 that afternoon on their Harleys. I'll just say we had a hell of a time that night.​

A day and a half later as we neared home, the last I ever SAW of my buddy he took his exit in a bad lightning storm and waved as I went on down the road home. Last I ever HEARD of my buddy he'd been busted in a meth sting. Several years ago now.

I'm still thankful to the Firefighters of Guymon, Oklahoma. You guys are amazing.
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Sound, quick thinking on your part.
 
Gave a family acquaintance some trail bologna/summer sausage stick for Christmas a couple years ago, he wanted to cut a piece off and try it and asked for a knife, he is an older fellow and should know how to properly use a knife by this time in his life, I hand him my Vic tinker after cautioning him how sharp it is, he then proceeds to attempt to slice a piece off his meat lot with the back side of the blade, which isn't working so well as the slip joint is trying to fold and the spine if the blade is pretty dull.
After trying this unsuccessfully more than once, despite me telling him he is holding the knife backwards, he gives the SAK back to me and tears into it with his teeth.
I am not sure he has ever used a knife before, after that embarrassment.
 
I let a coworker borrow a knife once and found him in a network closet punching down phone wires with my Ontario XM Strike Fighter. No damage to the blade, but that's when I started carrying a beater/loaner knife.
 
Darn SAK's and their symmetrical handles lol.
But yeah, it shouldn't be that hard to tell which side of the knife does the cutting. Unless you have never used one, but seriously, everyone has used a plastic knife at least once. It should give you basic enough skills to know one side cuts and the other doesn't.

I like reading threads like these, they always give me a laugh.
 
No, I stabbed my left-hand thumb with my right hand. My thumb was facing downwards holding a piece of wood.
 
I watch my uncle using his Scrade lock back to do all sorts of stuff, but it's not too stupid, seeing how he carries it almost only to use it as a screwdriver and prybar. He doesn't even want it sharp. He calls it his folding screwdriver too.


Working at am auto parts store I see a lot of prying and scraping with knives.
 
I was working at kohls at the time, my boss and i were unboxing the vaccuum cleaners to put them on display, he wanted to cut the tape off of one of the boxes and asked for my knife (kershaw tanto blur). I told him, "be careful. Its really. Really. Sharp." He goes, "oh reaaalllyy!?" And runs (practically jammed) his thumb along the edge and *pthbbt* fillets a flap of meat off.
Not a HUGE cut. Probably just the area you'd use to operate a thumb stud or axis lock....
F*ing ridiculous.
He got all ticked off at me and i said, "dude.. I totally warned you." And HIS boss tells him, "yeah. He really did."
 
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[video=youtube;S06nIz4scvI]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S06nIz4scvI[/video]
 
Similar to the story about the tongue guy, but less ridiculous. My friend said "now here's how you test if a knife is sharp" tested the edge on my brand new DOC by running his finger across it.... 5 stitches later, agreed paper cutting is better method.
 
Unfortunately the "run a finger ALONG the edge" Test seems to be fairly common among non-knife people. Probably as they only know dull knives where this "test" has not produced cut fingers so far.
 
I'm still cringing over the tongue story!

A friend asked me for advice for a 3.5 inch folder and based on what he told me I advised a Spyderco Paramilitary 2. He is not a knife person. When it arrived, I warned him repeatedly that it was extremely sharp. He took it out of the box and promptly stabbed himself in the hand (how I still don't know and I was standing there). He was thinking he needed an ambulance but I got him calmed down, cleaned up, and bandaged. Now, he is too scared to take the knife out of the box.

Another one: We were squirrel hunting and invited a friend to tag along. One of us shot a squirrel, but it died on the end of a limb, so our hero borrows a fixed blade knife, climbs the tree, and with the limb bending dangerously under his weight, cuts the limb off, behind himself! Yes, he really did!

Edit: This is not a fairy tale. He did it. We got the squirrel and he got bruises.
 
Ferahgo said:
I just finished sharpening the kitchen knives when this happened. Shortly after I did this, I walked back into the kitchen, and my mom had cut the crap out of her thumb. She was using a 10" Americraft Buck chefs knife to slice an apple. She slipped and cut to the bone on her thumb. We had to go to the ER and get 5 stiches.
What have you seen non-knife people do with a blade?
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I don't see how this is dumb either. I primarily use a 10" knife on virtually everything in my kitchen and I also do 90% of the cooking in our house. It's extremely rare that I cut myself there. Everything has been only a nick. I do use a cutting board tbough.

Dumbest thing I saw recently is my boss asking to borrow my work knife then handing it to his 5 year old son to run his finger on the edge to see how sharp it was. Made me cringe. Luckily I had been extremely busy that week and hadn't gotten around to touching it up so it wasn't quite it's usual razor status but it was still pretty sharp. Luckily he didn't cut himself.

I don't mind loaning my work knife because I beat on and abuse it too. My after work knife is a different story. No one borrows it.... seen too many people try to chisel and pry with them for that.
 
I was doing a stair climb race a while back and the timer was supposed to attached to the climbers shoe so they gave out zip ties. Of course being the only person in the parking garage with a knife to cut the ends off off the ties turned out badly. I handed off my Spyderco Stretch in zdp-189 and a few minutes later noticed that the concrete floor was being used as a cutting board. Needless to say I had to sharpen a few chips out when I got home. Lesson learned!
 
My old partner who was never a knife guy, until we became partners anyways wanted to use my CRKT Brian Tighe. I warned him it fairly new so dont drop it! also it was sharp and those serrations on those CRKT are fairly nasty. I swear i dont know how he did it...but while he was opening the knife he cut himself! Never seen it before! He opened the knife cut himself and flung the knife (of course) luckily it fell straight down and not to either side of him. It was during morning brief so the room was full of people, could have stuck one of us.

And yes, I'm a knife person but I have my own emberassing story, we went camping last week and i decided to clean out the Bronco this weekend. I picked up my knives from my seat and for some stupid reason I had my fixed blade hunting knife upside down. It has a very basic leather sheath woth to snap closure or anything and as I closed my door my knife decided it would be a good time to give to the laws of gravity and landed on the top of my foot! Of course it landed point down, why wouldn't it right? So I bleed for a good long while and was emberassed...
But we all have room to learn! Knife people or not!

Cheers
-RP13
 
Trabireiter said:
Unfortunately the "run a finger ALONG the edge" Test seems to be fairly common among non-knife people. Probably as they only know dull knives where this "test" has not produced cut fingers so far.
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What's up with that? I think I even read that running a finger along the edge tests the sharpness in a review or somewhere. The only thing I can think of, is it to see how easily it cuts you? Running a finger across the edge shouldn't get you cut if you do it horizontally, as opposed to at an angle, with your thumb or finger, but does that really test the sharpness? Doesn't it only work the "micro teeth"?
 
EChoil said:
A buddy (whom I knew, not well when we departed but realized he was possibly head-injured as the trip unfolded) and I were on the westbound comeback of a lengthy road trip on our Harleys, riding since sunup, when we stopped to eat lunch at a restaurant. Afterward we were at our scooters in the parking lot, rigging for another stretch of road, when he decided he wanted to cut the sleeves off his T-shirt using his Leatherman blade).

I looked over and he was stabbing at the limp sleeves of the T-shirt while holding it--this guy looked like you had given a three-year-old girl a butcher knife and said, "Here, cut this." It was pathetic; looked like he'd NEVER handled a knife before (I'd noticed his odd use of a knife when he ate, too, but just put it down to probably being head-injured).

I walked over, told him he was gonna kill the shirt if he kept doing that, drew my 4" leuku and showed him how to hold the sleeve taught and SLICE it down the seam. Handing the shirt back to him, he started stabbing again, nearly got me and I backed off and went back to my bike in disgust, leaving him to his own methods.​

Next thing I know I hear, "Help me!....Help me!" and I turn around and the guy's holding his arm high in the air where he'd just put the whole blade into the center of his underside forearm and got an artery or two.

Trying to keep this short, I grabbed him and convinced him he wasn't going to die...he's going into shock now...and walked him back into the restaurant which was full of lunchtime crowd and a waiting line. The guy is spewing blood even though I had him keeping pressure on it. I sat him in a chair and told him again he was going to live.

Now, some of the elderly ladies were fainting in the doorway and the wait staff, mostly young girls, were panicking and dropping stuff...I've no idea where the manager was. I know some of the people at tables and booths dropped but I was so busy I don't know how many. So I started trying to direct the waitresses...one calling an ambulance, one to get some ice and towels, one to find the manager, one to assist me with stopping his bleeding, etc, etc...​

He finally passed and fell on the floor before the Fire-paras got there but they arrived pretty quickly and took him to their ambulance. He revived in there, they got it under control and I followed them to the hospital.

After 4 hours in the ER and this guy using every ploy he knew to get hard drugs from every nurse, doctor and candy striper who walked by, he was sutured up, given his painkillers and all was well with him again.

He couldn't ride his scooter until at least morning, so one of the firemen who'd evidently been assigned to aid us that day drove it back to a motel where they had secured two rooms for us.

My buddy crashed til morning the instant he got into the room--toast. Meantime, the firefighters we'd been with that day, who had helped us out TREMENDOUSLY, were riders and showed up at my room about 6:00 that afternoon on their Harleys. I'll just say we had a hell of a time that night.​

A day and a half later as we neared home, the last I ever SAW of my buddy he took his exit in a bad lightning storm and waved as I went on down the road home. Last I ever HEARD of my buddy he'd been busted in a meth sting. Several years ago now.

I'm still thankful to the Firefighters of Guymon, Oklahoma. You guys are amazing.
Click to expand...

Now that's a great story! Small world too - I used to live right down the road from Guymon! Passed through there all the time man.
 
Dumbest thing a non knife person did? Charge a rhinoceros.
Dumbest thing a knife knut did? Me--chased a racoon with my ESEE 5. Believe you me it was fearin for its life. 6'4", 250lbs guy chasin it with a knife.
 
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