- Joined
- May 12, 2008
- Messages
- 756
Hes practicing to be a car salesman lol
-
The BladeForums.com 2024 Traditional Knife is available! Price is $250 ea (shipped within CONUS).
Order here: https://www.bladeforums.com/help/2024-traditional/
WOT: Lying 7 year old
- Thread starter theedge13
- Start date
pffffft....
not if i can help it. nothing against that...my dad supported my horse sized appetite by selling cars....just i would like for him to be something else. but if that is what he aspires to do...then Yes, he has a good start.
- Joined
- Feb 28, 2008
- Messages
- 4,834
Did you get to pick your own, too?
i hear that...i sure as hell did. i tried one time to get a thin one....DAMMIT...big mistake.... :thumbdn:
- Joined
- May 12, 2008
- Messages
- 756
My parent would have beat the crap out of me.
If nothing else workd have him kneeling on rice that is something that will last spanking imo is to violent.
- Joined
- Feb 28, 2008
- Messages
- 4,834
The worst I ever had was when my brother, cousin, and I all got in trouble and had to pick switches for one of the other boys. Of course, we all picked the worst ones we could find. Grandpa said "You think that they deserve more than you are gonne get so I'm using the switch you picked on you." Totally sucked...
Steel-Junky
Banned
- Joined
- Jan 15, 2009
- Messages
- 768
Call him a liar. Tell him you can't trust him or believe what he says because he's a liar. Explain to him that all a man has is his word and if he loses that... he's worthless as a human being. My nephew has this same problem and I went that route and he doesn't lie to me anymore. He lies to his mother and father all the time because they're limp wristed and do worthless crap like time out. When I came up... the belt taught me a lot of lessons... and I only had to learn them once.
- Joined
- Mar 29, 2001
- Messages
- 1,236
Every child is different much like all of us here are different and has to be dealt with accordingly. People say that talking works it does if the child is that sort of child, I've seen more than one child go bad in a family while the other child is just the best thing since slice bread.
One of the problems with our society is that we have parents who don't want to be parents but want to be friends. We have parents who should not be parents in the first place. With that being said it really depends on the child some children need firm discipline while others need to be talked to. By firm discipline, I don't mean child abuse, there a huge difference between spanking and beating imo. If you elect to spank the child it should not be in the heat of the moment and never alone.
One of the problems with our society is that we have parents who don't want to be parents but want to be friends. We have parents who should not be parents in the first place. With that being said it really depends on the child some children need firm discipline while others need to be talked to. By firm discipline, I don't mean child abuse, there a huge difference between spanking and beating imo. If you elect to spank the child it should not be in the heat of the moment and never alone.
Yeah, that would certainly be hard to do. I know right now I have my girlfriends younger brother living with us. When he says something out of line, im quick to come back at it, he's not used to a another male in the family( lived with their mother, thats another story)anyways, for the most part he calms down, but he can get at your nerves with the little lies, like " I didnt leave my dirty laundry in the bathroom" or " no, I dont know where my math book is, I forgot it at school" For one, I know he didnt forget it, it was left there on purpose, blah blah. Hes 14, you get the picture.
One thing I do know, when I was younger, I had Two options when I was out of line, go find one of my belts, or go cut my own switch, I caught on fast to quit dickin' around.
One thing I do know, when I was younger, I had Two options when I was out of line, go find one of my belts, or go cut my own switch, I caught on fast to quit dickin' around.
Hey TheEdge the most important part is, How old is your son?? But i would say it all depands on the Lie. The punishment should fit the Crime\Lie. First time talk is in order with rules and limits implied. Second time talk and punishment. Hitting a teen wont realy work as they need to be treated as an adult. But do take away what they want the most after all it is punishment. What ever you do im sure you would do fine.. Just dont lose your cool.
Sasha
Sasha
- Joined
- Nov 27, 2004
- Messages
- 3,124
If you're son is old enough, consider having a serious discussion about the role of trust in contemporary society. It is disappearing. Today, we are profiled, risk-managed, surveilled, counted, quantified, and measured. We go through background checks and tests on a regular basis, and our entire system of commerce is based on routine identity challenges and password controls. We internalize this and go about our business as risk-adverse citizens. Meanwhile, the bonds of interpersonal trust that are so essential to establishing and maintaining social cohesion are being eroded and rendered irrelevant.
There are so few relationships where the possibility of genuine trust is even entertained, and those relationships need to be respected and maintained. One such relationship exists (or should exist) between parent and child. When this sort of bond of trust is breached, it risks contaminating the home with the same sort of suspicion and surveillance that characterizes the rest of our society.
The choice, ultimately, is your son's, and I would emphasize this. His actions will determine how you engage with him. If he chooses to be honest, and to respect that rare bond of trust, then he will be rewarded by your confidence. If, on the other hand, he is dishonest, then he invites not only punishment (which can be fleeting) but suspicion (which tends to be pervasive). And, as a responsible parent, you have no control over this, really - his welfare is your responsibility, and if he is dishonest, it forces you to be mistrustful in order to do your job. Ultimately, any individual transgression (the stuff he is lying about) can be forgiven, but the deception is corrosive and much more difficult to get past.
I often have conversations along these lines with my students, sometimes successfully. The line "You don't know what you've got 'till it's gone" rings true here.
Good luck with it,
All the best,
- Mike
There are so few relationships where the possibility of genuine trust is even entertained, and those relationships need to be respected and maintained. One such relationship exists (or should exist) between parent and child. When this sort of bond of trust is breached, it risks contaminating the home with the same sort of suspicion and surveillance that characterizes the rest of our society.
The choice, ultimately, is your son's, and I would emphasize this. His actions will determine how you engage with him. If he chooses to be honest, and to respect that rare bond of trust, then he will be rewarded by your confidence. If, on the other hand, he is dishonest, then he invites not only punishment (which can be fleeting) but suspicion (which tends to be pervasive). And, as a responsible parent, you have no control over this, really - his welfare is your responsibility, and if he is dishonest, it forces you to be mistrustful in order to do your job. Ultimately, any individual transgression (the stuff he is lying about) can be forgiven, but the deception is corrosive and much more difficult to get past.
I often have conversations along these lines with my students, sometimes successfully. The line "You don't know what you've got 'till it's gone" rings true here.
Good luck with it,
All the best,
- Mike
- Joined
- Apr 14, 2006
- Messages
- 12,196
He wants your approval more than ANYTHING at that age.
Tell him you are "HURT" that you are rasing a boy that "LIES" to his father.
Ask him what YOU and His MOTHER did wrong to raise a son who lies???
It puts it all ON HIM!!!!!
He has to think about how he has hurt you.and HER
...and will think long and hard before he does it again.
Tell him you are "HURT" that you are rasing a boy that "LIES" to his father.
Ask him what YOU and His MOTHER did wrong to raise a son who lies???
It puts it all ON HIM!!!!!
He has to think about how he has hurt you.and HER
...and will think long and hard before he does it again.
Yes, body language is a big thing. You can talk nice all day but if you're bowed up with a vein popping out of your neck you'll scare a kid half to death. Just let them know that despite the consequences, they have the power to dig themselves out of the hole they got themselves into. That is called accountability. They are never too young to learn that if they cover their @ss by doing everything they are supposed to, then they get more freedoms, less restrictions, more trust, less supervision, etc.
Make this about him putting himself in a better place with you. Not about him being doomed by his actions. You have to teach this lesson a few more times than you would if you did the discipline route, but it works out for the better. If we are disciplined and do not realize that we have the ability to make these things right with future behaviors (the good ones), then we will only be on our toes when being watched, and inevitably relapse once no one is watching us. Translation: If you make sure he knows the choice is clearly his, then he will be able to take pride in doing the right thing and getting rewarded for it. He will also begin to take responsibility for lies or mistakes.
I think thats how many kids end up lying at young ages--they make a mistake doing a task, managing time, by forgetting and do not want to disappoint you. Thus the "cover-up" of the poor behavior. Its not that they want to neccessarily put one over on you, they just do not want to be "found out" and disappoint you. At 7 years old, I'd bet you a dollar or two that may be part of it. If he were doing this in 4 years at 11 or 12, it would likely be a more selfish motivation.
That hurts and boy did it teach me a lesson, I never crossed my grandmother after that. I feared that more than her rolling pin
- Joined
- May 12, 2008
- Messages
- 756
That hurts and boy did it teach me a lesson, I never crossed my grandmother after that. I feared that more than her rolling pin
getting up is a real BLEEP.
- Joined
- Jun 7, 2007
- Messages
- 2,179
I think work as a punishment is the wrong way to go about it,I think every child should have a few chores around the house from an early age but I'm probably a little older than most of you guys and I grew up on a farm and had more chores by the time I was 6 or7 than most kids ever have now days.
When we were growing up,Dad very seldom ever was in charge of punishment,that was Moms job and she was into belts,you learned to behave the first time.
When we were growing up,Dad very seldom ever was in charge of punishment,that was Moms job and she was into belts,you learned to behave the first time.
My dad isn't much of a positive influence ( I'm 40)
My little bloke is three. Every day, all day I tell him how much I love him and every little thing he does that is correct, new or just right I give him a big hug and tell him how happy he makes me. Generaly he is a good kid.
However when he does the wrong thing ie; pushing other kids ( big for his age) and he tried some B/S last week I tell him I am sad and won't initially take hugs from him because I am too sad. It really gets too him.
He does get smacked. But more often he gets sent to isolation " the naughty chair" anti social behavior at kindy he gets removed from the play immediately and explained that if he is going to carry on like that then he can't play with the others. He is really social, so isolation is a biggie with him.
I do believe violence is a form of communication but not for three yr olds.
Don't forget your his Dad and therefore sometimes you have to be an A@#hole to stop yourself getting repeatedly called down to the "copshop" at 2am in the future.
I'm working on the theory that if you set the foundation by the time he is seven we should be right.
A kids job is to push the boundaries, the parents job is to set and enforce boundaries and not take it personally as the kids push.
Carl
My little bloke is three. Every day, all day I tell him how much I love him and every little thing he does that is correct, new or just right I give him a big hug and tell him how happy he makes me. Generaly he is a good kid.
However when he does the wrong thing ie; pushing other kids ( big for his age) and he tried some B/S last week I tell him I am sad and won't initially take hugs from him because I am too sad. It really gets too him.
He does get smacked. But more often he gets sent to isolation " the naughty chair" anti social behavior at kindy he gets removed from the play immediately and explained that if he is going to carry on like that then he can't play with the others. He is really social, so isolation is a biggie with him.
I do believe violence is a form of communication but not for three yr olds.
Don't forget your his Dad and therefore sometimes you have to be an A@#hole to stop yourself getting repeatedly called down to the "copshop" at 2am in the future.
I'm working on the theory that if you set the foundation by the time he is seven we should be right.
A kids job is to push the boundaries, the parents job is to set and enforce boundaries and not take it personally as the kids push.
Carl