Member dobywon is a liar

[Unbreakable]

Lighten up Francis...the guy said he was tired and had a headache..and lost his cool and later apologized...be a man about it and accept his apology and forgive and forget...

BTW people call me a Fag every day...big deal...that insult is so 1980s

Bottom line is that the back and forth between me and another member doesn't mean anything to me. It happens and I could really give two thirds of a rusted damn about it. But the feedback issue makes me angry. And no... I'm not gonna forgive and forget. You wanna imply that I'm not a man and should be named Francis for it... go ahead... that part doesn't bother me. Just don't go messing up my itrader rating.

 

[Ren the devils trailboss]

Bottom line is that the back and forth between me and another member doesn't mean anything to me. It happens and I could really give two thirds of a rusted damn about it. But the feedback issue makes me angry. And no... I'm not gonna forgive and forget. You wanna imply that I'm not a man and should be named Francis for it... go ahead... that part doesn't bother me. Just don't go messing up my itrader rating.

the Francis thing was a line from the movie "Stripes" I do not know if you remember it...

I am sure your a man...

I am assuming you are younger than me so Ill give you a little internet advice..In life do not sweat the small stuff..Forgive and forget...too much "stuff" can kill you...it aint healthy..

two thirds of a rusted dam...LOL..I gotta remember that one..

Ren

that said..contact a super mod such as Bastid. Or KenC and they can probably have the bad itrader reversed. If you need my help anything I can do to help I will be glad to. Both Bastid and Ken are friends..

 

[Esav Benyamin]

It's being taken care of, thanks. The fewer people who encourage dobywon to think he's the good guy, the sooner this will be over.

 

[Guyon]

I see Unbreakable's I-Trader rating has been restored to 100%.

The fewer people who encourage dobywon to think he's the good guy, the sooner this will be over.

I totally agree with this claim, and though I know some here would rather let it rest, I'm addressing the "good guy" idea nonetheless. Insomnia or a headache are both poor excuses for a lapse in ethical behavior, and I think there's a little too much credit being given here by a number of folks. I understand the need to smooth over ruffles and restore peace in a social setting, but not at the expense of being naive about the situation.

Consider someone who smears your name in public and then, only after being called out on it, throws up an apology. I'm a little less convinced that such an offering makes the offending party a "good guy" or "a man." Public figures make such apologies all the time--not so much because they truly believe in them, but because they fear the repercussions if they don't.

It would be different if dobywon had apologized of his own accord soon after faking the I-Trader rating. Given the order of events, however, it makes it appear that he fears banning more than he feels remorse for lying and sullying Unbreakable's I-trader reputation. No idea if this assessment is correct, but such is the appearance. Given that sparks were still flying a bit in this thread after the first apology, it makes me wonder how contrite dobywon truly is.

Maybe I'm just cynical though. Maybe this response is as good an indication as any that I really do need to get away from BFC for a while.

The hope, of course, is that dobywon does gain some maturity from this experience. And yes, to a degree, he should get some credit for coming into this thread and responding to his actions and apologizing. Avoiding the issue would have been much worse. But there's a little too much back patting going on in this thread IMO. What about commending Unbreakable for bringing this one to our attention?

 

[Ken44]

dobywon, I am very supprised that you messed with someones itrader.
Were you going to apologize before this thread was started...or is this thread the only reason you apologized?

 

[stabber]

Yeay! And they all lived happily ever after:thumbup:

 

[dobywon]

I see Unbreakable's I-Trader rating has been restored to 100%.



I totally agree with this claim, and though I know some here would rather let it rest, I'm addressing the "good guy" idea nonetheless. Insomnia or a headache are both poor excuses for a lapse in ethical behavior, and I think there's a little too much credit being given here by a number of folks. I understand the need to smooth over ruffles and restore peace in a social setting, but not at the expense of being naive about the situation.

Consider someone who smears your name in public and then, only after being called out on it, throws up an apology. I'm a little less convinced that such an offering makes the offending party a "good guy" or "a man." Public figures make such apologies all the time--not so much because they truly believe in them, but because they fear the repercussions if they don't.

It would be different if dobywon had apologized of his own accord soon after faking the I-Trader rating. Given the order of events, however, it makes it appear that he fears banning more than he feels remorse for lying and sullying Unbreakable's I-trader reputation. No idea if this assessment is correct, but such is the appearance. Given that sparks were still flying a bit in this thread after the first apology, it makes me wonder how contrite dobywon truly is.

Maybe I'm just cynical though. Maybe this response is as good an indication as any that I really do need to get away from BFC for a while.

The hope, of course, is that dobywon does gain some maturity from this experience. And yes, to a degree, he should get some credit for coming into this thread and responding to his actions and apologizing. Avoiding the issue would have been much worse. But there's a little too much back patting going on in this thread IMO. What about commending Unbreakable for bringing this one to our attention?

Well said Mr quick to point the finger and judge someone. You dont know me or anything about me. I was only explaining my actions not making excuses.
I had been at work all day and when i come home the thread was already established. I am sorry that your not conveinced that my apology was sinciere but it was. I had all day to think about what I did and I put myself in Unbreakables place and thought " I would be really upset if someone did that to me." I not only apologized I admitted that what I did was wrong and I called myself immature. My name is the one that is being smeared all over the place and all you are doing is adding to it.

You are right about one thing I do enjoy Blade forums and no I dont want to be banned but I made a mistake and all I can do is apologize and not let it happen again. I have made many mistakes in my time and will make many more but I am not a bad guy.

So if anyone want to keep this thing going any longer then I cant do anything about that but this is the last response from me to this thread.

 

[markksr]

It's being taken care of, thanks. The fewer people who encourage dobywon to think he's the good guy, the sooner this will be over.

I see Unbreakable's I-Trader rating has been restored to 100%.



I totally agree with this claim, and though I know some here would rather let it rest, I'm addressing the "good guy" idea nonetheless. Insomnia or a headache are both poor excuses for a lapse in ethical behavior, and I think there's a little too much credit being given here by a number of folks. I understand the need to smooth over ruffles and restore peace in a social setting, but not at the expense of being naive about the situation.

Consider someone who smears your name in public and then, only after being called out on it, throws up an apology. I'm a little less convinced that such an offering makes the offending party a "good guy" or "a man." Public figures make such apologies all the time--not so much because they truly believe in them, but because they fear the repercussions if they don't.

It would be different if dobywon had apologized of his own accord soon after faking the I-Trader rating. Given the order of events, however, it makes it appear that he fears banning more than he feels remorse for lying and sullying Unbreakable's I-trader reputation. No idea if this assessment is correct, but such is the appearance. Given that sparks were still flying a bit in this thread after the first apology, it makes me wonder how contrite dobywon truly is.

Maybe I'm just cynical though. Maybe this response is as good an indication as any that I really do need to get away from BFC for a while.

The hope, of course, is that dobywon does gain some maturity from this experience. And yes, to a degree, he should get some credit for coming into this thread and responding to his actions and apologizing. Avoiding the issue would have been much worse. But there's a little too much back patting going on in this thread IMO. What about commending Unbreakable for bringing this one to our attention?

I bit my tongue at first, but I must speak up now and say that I agree whole-heartedly with these two statements.

 

[Guyon]

Well said Mr quick to point the finger and judge someone. You dont know me or anything about me. I was only explaining my actions not making excuses.
I had been at work all day and when i come home the thread was already established. I am sorry that your not conveinced that my apology was sinciere but it was. I had all day to think about what I did and I put myself in Unbreakables place and thought " I would be really upset if someone did that to me." I not only apologized I admitted that what I did was wrong and I called myself immature. My name is the one that is being smeared all over the place and all you are doing is adding to it.

Your name is not being smeared. You lied by posting a fake I-Trader rating, and you were called out as a liar. That's not smearing you. That's holding you accountable for your actions.

Moreover, my post did not pass judgment with any finality. I did point out, however, that the order of events and the venue where you (apparently) responded to Unbreakable makes the apology appear motivated by public pressure and a fear of being banned.

As such, I did express a question about contrition, true. However, as you point out, I really don't know. Only you and your God know this one. If you say you were and are truly contrite, then that's fine by me.

Your post above suggests that you may have addressed Unbreakable directly with an apology. True? If you came home and sent a PM apology to Unbreakable, or even if you intended to do so before you saw this thread, then my whole post above is moot, and I apologize for suggesting that you might have had a different agenda.

 

[on_the_edge]

Moreover, my post did not pass judgment with any finality. I did point out, however, that the order of events and the venue where you (apparently) responded to Unbreakable makes the apology appear motivated by public pressure and a fear of being banned.

Which is more important- dobywon's apology or speculation about why he apologized? In the end, who really cares what his motivation for apologizing was? You see, he did not just apologize, but he attempted to explain what had happened and why. He also stated that he would make every attempt to not repeat his admitted mistake. Why does his reason for apologizing need to coincide with your belief about why he should apologize?

As such, I did express a question about contrition, true. However, as you point out, I really don't know. Only you and your God know this one. If you say you were and are truly contrite, then that's fine by me.

So why express the question about contrition in the first place, unless you're just looking for self-satisfaction? Even if that is the case, as you stated, nobody except dobywon and his God will ever know.

 

[Guyon]

on_the_edge, please read the apology again, and tell me if you think dobywon is apologizing to Unbreakable or to everyone except Unbreakable, mods in particular. He refers to Unbreakable in the third person throughout.

Speculate about my motives all you like, but Unbreakable's post above suggests that dobywon still hasn't apologized to him directly. "Jerk" comment or not from Unbreakable (which was poor form), that kind of direct address would have been the right thing, the "manly" thing, to do.

It's not so much about why he should apologize I'm addressing. That's a given. It's about how he's gone about the matter. Like I said above, I can't really know dobywon's psyche. But as a member of this community, I can object to how he's handled himself.

First off I want to say what I did was wrong and I apologize. I did leave feedback in unbreakables i-trader without making a deal with him. The reason for this is immature and I am ashamed that I acted like a teenager before thinking. I was hving a hard time sleeping last night and had a terrible headache. I come on the forums last night and notice I have a message.It was from unbreakable andit said"Thanks for at least responding to me ya jerk"
He didnt bother to tell that part. So without thinking I retaliated and left negative feedback in his i-trader. I have had several offers and did not reply because I forgot not to be a JERK. So like I said I am sorry for doing what I did but unbreakable had no reason for leaving such a crappy pm.

Here is the link to the pm he left
http://www.bladeforums.com/forums/private.php?do=showpm&pmid=733029

Again I dont want to get banned for this and I will never let it happen again but it caught me offguard and upset me.

I AM IMMATURE!!!

Lee

EDIT:

Rather than drag this one back to the front page, I am simply going to add a late-breaking edit to my post. dobywon has continued to express his regret about this action, this time in an open note to the Busse community. http://www.bladeforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=605458

Since there was no administrative ban and since many accepted his apology at face value, he did not need to take the matter any further than this thread, yet he did so. As a result, in my book at least, he seems to exhibit real contrition over his choice, and I am inclined to retract the doubts I've expressed in posts here. I admit to reading too much into his choice of language, and I should have PM'ed dobywon behind the scenes before I made some of my comments.

Some of my frustration in this thread was likely a byproduct of and spillover from a few "HOGs" acting in poor judgment in the past week or two. However, given dobywon's post in the Busse forum, it seems like he genuinely wants to be a positive contributor to that community and get past his lapse in judgment. I, for one, accept dobywon's apology to the larger community, one that includes Unbreakable.

.

 

[Esav Benyamin]

'ya jerk"

That's the worst he said? Not exactly fightin' words.

 

[on_the_edge]

Guyon,
The way I read the first sentence, he is apologizing to everyone, not either Unbreakable or everyone else. I understand your interpretation and why you feel that way, but maybe dobywon has already personally addressed Unbreakable's concerns privately and now feels like he has to address everyone else's, and hence he is using the third person. We need more information to know which interpretation is correct, but is it really necessary to go there?

I am not trying to speculate about your motives, but I am trying to understand what difference dobywon's motives makes. Yes, you can object to how he has handled himself just as I can accept the same. I am just choosing to give him the benefit of the doubt whereas it seems as though you are a bit more cautious about it. That's fine--neither way is more correct than the other. Truth be told, we have all stepped on our own **** from time to time and I am no exception ( Heck, I may be doing it here...again). Only time will tell how this plays out.

 

[jill jackson]

He only needs to apologize to the party he left the false feedback on and beg forgiveness from the staff at bladeforums for abusing the system. IMO, everybody isn't really wronged by this.
I will say if I'd left negative feedback on somebody for spite I'd figure to be banned.
He wasn't and should be happy and we all see why he did it and irregardless of why it was still a dirty trick and I think he's lucky.

 

[mndart]

I have had a couple great dealings with dobywon....but that doesnt excuse a late night mistake...he is a good guy and I am sure he will make it right!
Andy

Me too. Good dealings with Dobywon. He's manned up. Lets get back to holiday cheer!