You're right, I don't have plans to defend myself with my knife, nor do I purchase my knives with self defense in mind. I have no training with knife fighting (or any other kind of fighting), and would likely cause just as much damage to myself as to the other guy if I did use one. If for some reason I felt that I might reasonably need to use my knife for self defense, then I might change my buying behavior.
However, your assumption that I wouldn't use anything I could reach to survive/defend my life or that of my family is incorrect (and a touch insulting). Of course I'd use whatever I had available to me to defend myself and those that I value. If for some reason I thought that pulling my (insert lock type) knife out would increase those odds, then of course I would do it. As it is right now , I don't feel I need to select an EDC based on ability to stab humans, simply because I feel that 1) its so unlikely to happen and 2) anything sharp can do the job if it really needs to (and I do carry something sharp). If it matters, I also don't chose my other tools based on how well they do that either, but acknowledge that a torque wrench, screwdriver, or any other number of things could be quite useful/helpful in a fight if somehow one happened and they were close by.
I own one Cold Steel product (trail hawk), one Spyderco (the bug, the 1in blade, 3cr13mov slipjoint), and exactly zero Benchmades. I don't consider myself a fanboy of any folding knife manufacturer. I even kind of like the Finn Wolf that Cold Steel just released (folding Mora basically), but found its only tip up carry only, which is somewhat of a deal breaker for me

.
The real question though, is if they had two knives that I really wanted that were identical in all respects (other than locks, one of course being the tri-ad version) which would I buy? The answer would be the cheaper one, whichever it was. So, I don't hate the lock, I don't feel much one way or the other about it, just haven't found its main feature to be something important to me.
You're right, I'd say that Cold Steel has developed a following for people that like their knives, and their lock. Its hard to say if their success/popularity is due to the lock though (especially since they have so many knives with that lock now, that its harder to say what is causing the sales, as if you took the tri-ad lock out, they wouldn't have many offerings left).
I totally agree. You're right the knife market is large, and can indeed accommodate many different uses/preferences. I'm just as happy that I don't have to carry a big tactical folder, as you probably are about not being forced to carry a friction folder, and I'm totally ok with that

.
Also, I'd like to point out that at no point in time did I say that others were wrong for how they used their knives. Its your knife, do what you want. As long as its not going to hurt me or anyone else, I'm totally ok with that. I don't think of myself as the "knife use police" at all. I was merely stating (at least in my other posts) why it was that I didn't understand why people were so up in arms about lock strength discussions.
What you're probably referring to though is that I
did say that when people make statements like "my liner lock almost closed when I stabbed a tree", my first thought is a question. Simply that I don't understand why they were doing that in the first place. The whole time I've just been saying I don't understand why most people care about lock strength, and "most" reasons people give don't make sense to me (ie, tree stabbing). The other reasons that people say they need a strong lock, just don't apply to me (need something close to the strength of a fixed blade, but for space/legal reasons you can't carry one for instance), which is why "I" don't care about it. But that is a totally valid reason for someone to care about these tests.
Also, just because I don't understand why someone does something doesn't mean that there aren't good reasons for it. I mean, a few weeks ago I learned that there is an actual need for some people for a "shower knife". I said in that thread I couldn't think of a reason why someone would ever need one, and later a few people responded with the fact that for some people, it makes sense, and now I'm can see why some people might carry one.
This is essentially how I feel when people say that they were stabbing trees. Maybe I'll learn in the future that the trees were in fact ents, that there is a competitive tree stabbing league, that its a sign of manhood, (and here's a real one) maybe thats they're preferred method of testing lock/tip/ strength, and various handle grips and then I'll understand.
[video=youtube;wJ8hxQfBhEE]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJ8hxQfBhEE[/video]
Anyway, no hard feelings intended towards you or others. And hopefully you see the video as I intended (adding some much needed humor).
Cheers!