Silly Knife Names Thread

The Squidward has actually become my fav to carry cause it’s so small but cuts big. The one thing with Kizer I can figure out is their pricing. They hey use a handful of recipe-steels and all are within a half inch of eachother but the prices jump from like $40-120 for knives made from the same stuff.. maybe I’ve missed something. I’m not talking their nicer Ti handled stuff I’m taking the bulk of the big sellers. Like the Squidward is a $70 knife… but the T1 with more blade and same materials goes for less almost anywhere you go. And the Squidward wasn’t popular, so that can’t be why it’s priced high. Anyways.. just a random thought.

My new thing has been CRKT.. kind of a fascinating brand. No matter how bad a grind may be or weird a design, they are always bulletproof (with great customer service to boot)
 
Kershaw Speedbump…
They have more goofy names like the “Brawler” and the “Freefall”, which is ironic because it doesn’t free fall the least; it’s spring assisted lol
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BTTLBRN said:
I have always thought that WE had some "interesting" choices - my personal favorite the Gnar. Get it, WE Gnar; WEEEE GNAR! .... :p
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Gnar: A primeval yordle whose playful antics can erupt into a toddler's outrage in an instant, transforming him into a massive beast bent on destruction.
GNAR: Greater Nashville Association of Realtors
 
Tsujigiri said:
Worst I've seen is the Maxace Titanus. I'm surprised the knife review channels were able to resist the urge to pronounce it "tight anus."

Along similar lines, I've found that Busse means something completely different to some people; I think they spell it as bussy, though...
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How a name makes it to market without anyone saying it out loud once is pretty great. Horrible name, this one wins probably.
 
HFB has the SHPOS, subhuman POS.

Skallywog - original name for the MDV was KITE. knife in the eye
 
Mlm0889 said:
How a name makes it to market without anyone saying it out loud once is pretty great. Horrible name, this one wins probably.
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Could also be non-native speakers of English, too... I used to have a Swiss watch called the Ball Deepquest, that was another one of the all-time worst product names I've seen lol
 
Another Shepherd said:
Gnar: A primeval yordle whose playful antics can erupt into a toddler's outrage in an instant, transforming him into a massive beast bent on destruction.
GNAR: Greater Nashville Association of Realtors
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What about Gnar as in gnarly? I am from CA so I will find terms like "gnar-gnar" coming out of my mouth, ha
 
Another Shepherd said:
Gnar: A primeval yordle whose playful antics can erupt into a toddler's outrage in an instant, transforming him into a massive beast bent on destruction.
GNAR: Greater Nashville Association of Realtors
Click to expand...

Mlm0889 said:
How a name makes it to market without anyone saying it out loud once is pretty great. Horrible name, this one wins probably.
Click to expand...

These are both Chinese brands, might be partially because english isn't their first language? Might have marketing teams over here though 🤷‍♂️
 
DocJD said:
Civivi Odium = https://www.wordnik.com/words/odium

Cold Steel names like Frenzy , Scalper , Mayhem . :eek:
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Rivaled only by TOPS for "knives you don't want named out loud when you're in court standing trial for using them." It's an elite club. 🧐

Prosecutor: "Please enter into the record that the accused was carrying a *squints* Trench Warfare MurderVenom 187 Throat Mutilator."
 
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