What to do if your spouse hates knives?

dbcad123 said:
Hey folks, first post on general discussion.

My wife has had concerns over my knife collecting also, but for us it has been with good reason. Economic uncerainty has caused me to agree with her and make my collection more sustainable, 20 or so +fixed blades. She isn't a controlling person operating on "wife version 1.0".

Plus I gave her a purple Spyderco FFG Delica. She has taken ownership of that knife, but will ask me to sharpen when it comes time.:D With vg-10 it might take a while.

This is a very large forum. echo...echo.......echo....

C
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As long as they cut way back on their spending too that's fine logic. ;)

As in the money stays in the bank.... If not well no deal. ;)

And you keep a sharp eye on the balance at all times, the second it drops the deal is off.

It never lasts long so you would be buying knives again in no time.....
 
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I'd suggest attempting to have her relate to the knife collecting hobby. A lot of the guys said "give her a taste of her own medicine" and harp on her about her shoes... but she has different shoes for different purposes. We have many knives for many reasons, some are just to look at.

I'd say it like that ^^, then I'd think up a way for her to use a knife sometime, (forgive the cliche) maybe with cooking (ha ha). If she's chopping veggies and uses one of your knives, which I'm sure are better than most I see in kitchens, maybe she'll how useful the tool is. Moreover, if somehow you could connect her to the hobby (I'll bet her grandfather never left the house without a pocketknife) she might be more inclined to see that it isn't a strange or scary thing.

I had a similar issue with my girlfriend, but attempting to involve her or relate the hobby to her she came around. Bought me a microtech last year for my birthday :)
 
jahv220 said:
but she has different shoes for different purposes. We have many knives for many reasons, some are just to look at.
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Not really.
The shoes are for covering the feet.
The knives are for cutting things.
See the parallels?
However, some shoes are better for walking, running, or whatever. Some are for looking at. Some are awesome at making toes bleed.:rolleyes:
Some knives are more suited to some tasks than others (try cutting wire on a flat surface with a hawkbill blade and THEN tell me how they're all for the same task.;)
 
stabman said:
Not really.
The shoes are for covering the feet.
The knives are for cutting things.
See the parallels?
However, some shoes are better for walking, running, or whatever. Some are for looking at. Some are awesome at making toes bleed.:rolleyes:
Some knives are more suited to some tasks than others (try cutting wire on a flat surface with a hawkbill blade and THEN tell me how they're all for the same task.;)
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Exactly, it easy for them to justify spending money if it's for them. ;)

Something for the man...... Well that's another story usually.

Women will go through money like water and not even think twice about it if they are getting something for themselves or they benefit from it etc.

From my experiences you have to watch them like a hawk and never take your eyes off the bank accounts, that is if you ever want to keep a balance in there and maybe get something that you might want.

Also if you wanted something for yourself (Heaven Forbid that happens) and they have a fit about it keep track on what they spend because usually they will have plans for that money. Plans as in something for themselves.....
 
Ankerson said:
Women will go through money like water and not even think twice about it if they are getting something for themselves or they benefit from it etc.

From my experiences you have to watch them like a hawk and never take your eyes off the bank accounts.
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Actually, it's the opposite in my case...I'M the high maintenance one!:D
There's not much cash left for shoes after I get more knives.:)
 
stabman said:
Actually, it's the opposite in my case...I'M the high maintenance one!:D
There's not much cash left for shoes after I get more knives.:)
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That's funny. :D

That's not usually the way it works though. :D
 
What would I do if my wife didn't like knives? The same thing I'd do if she didn't like guns. I'd miss her.

Of course, she came into our marriage with both - and has bought me some of each since, too. Her favorite knife is her recent foray into Benchmade - a 3150 Lertch Impel. It's good to share some interests.

Stainz
 
As long as the spending on knives comports with your household budget, you need to explain to her that this is what you want to do, you enjoy it, it makes you happy, you aren't spending money at girly bars, etc.

If this is thoroughly communicated to her with gentleness and respect, and she still raises an S-storm when you buy a knife, then you don't have a knife problem - you have a marital problem. JMO.
 
Stainz said:
What would I do if my wife didn't like knives? The same thing I'd do if she didn't like guns. I'd miss her.

Of course, she came into our marriage with both - and has bought me some of each since, too. Her favorite knife is her recent foray into Benchmade - a 3150 Lertch Impel. It's good to share some interests.

Stainz
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You make a good point there.

It's really best to know these things before you marry them. ;)

But sometimes these things don't show up until after you are married. That's what happened in both of my marriages and also why I ended them. I don't play freaking games, life is way too short to put up with any of that crap.

Live in's also, things tend to show up after they move in etc, or you move in with them. Once the games or other issues start I either show them the door or I move out depending on the situation.

Any kind of control issues etc and I cut it off very quick and I never look back..
 
My first wife hated knives, hated me making them, hated me reading about them. We only made it as man and wife 23 years.
 
Ed Fowler said:
My first wife hated knives, hated me making them, hated me reading about them. We only made it as man and wife 23 years.
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OMG!!! :eek:

I couldn't put up with either one of mine for more than 3 years before I gave them the boot. :D

Live in's are even shorter. ROFL :D
 
BTW, to the OP, if she ever uses the phrase, "If you really loved me, you'd..." it's over.

Abusive women use words like abusive husbands use fists.

No need to be a Stepford Husband.
 
m_calingo said:
BTW, to the OP, if she ever uses the phrase, "If you really loved me, you'd..." it's over.

Abusive women use words like abusive husbands use fists.

No need to be a Stepford Husband.
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Once they stop using the word WE and that changes to I there is a major problem and it's time to go because she is only thinking about herself from then on and you don't matter anymore.
 
Ed Fowler said:
My first wife hated knives, hated me making them, hated me reading about them. We only made it as man and wife 23 years.
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Wow, still a long run Ed. I've seen your knives and all I can say was that it was knifesmiths envy! ;)
 
I have a couple of questions first, before I offer any opinion (I have been married to the same woman almost 31 years). Are you married, or just living together? (big difference in my book). For how long? Do you have kids? How old? I think all of these need to be considered into the making of a decision. I agree with all the posters who think that the knives are not the issue, something else is (I don't pretend to know what is, with the information provided so far). When I first married, I was into the martials arts thing, guns, blades, etc. My young wife (also a physician like me), didn't like any of them, was scared of them.
But as it sometimes happens, we went through some "experiences" were she came to see the importance of having some mean of self protection. Today, she doesn't give a s...t if I buy a knife, sword, gun, etc., provided that the bills are paid (and I don't spend a ridiculously high amount of money).
I'd risk giving offense asking if you at any moment, threatened her with one of your knives (if you haven't, please accept my apologies).
In the end if you can't solve the issues by sincere discussion, you don't have kids and you have not been married more than a couple of years, I'd think yes, you should divorce her (probably it wasn't for you in the first place).
 
OP, you wouldn't happen to be Stedman, would you?

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My girlfriend and I get along fine on knives and guns. She knows they are my toys and gives me shit about them but doesn't seem to mind as long as I can afford them. She enjoys shopping and buying purses and I don't care. She has as many purses as I have knives, at least.

Different tool/accessory for different purposes.

I hope she'll stick around for a while:D
 
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