Yet another warranty issue that is unbelievable

Let's say hypothetically that I break my 5 throwing it at my brothers head. If I send you it back can I get one thats not serated? You can keep his head as a paper weight! ;)

In all seriousness, why would you want to throw an ESEE knife? The micarta might get dirty!
 
Don't tell no one, but I have the slipjoint as well. Never broke it, but, well, um, I don't throw it either. Keep this between us, though, if people knew I used a slipjoint, it would end my Taktikool persona.

Moose

I'm not 100%, but you may have just upped your chances of being on the ESEE Warranty Ass-Whoopin' Team (EWAWT).
 
I still carry a Case Peanut daily. It's small and unobtrusive. It has red bone scales so it doesn't carry the womenz folk and the metrosexuals. And it serves me well, day-in, day-out. Should I ever need to defend myself against the zombie hoards, I am prepared.

Stranded in the wild? Heck, I'm ready for that too.

I didn't see Case in your Super Sig. You sure you just aren't BS'n about the 'Nut. I mean, others have tried to roll the 'Nut, but just didn't have it.

Moose
 
I'm not 100%, but you may have just upped your chances of being on the ESEE Warranty Ass-Whoopin' Team (EWAWT).

Badass, I already got a tshirt with that acronym on it!!! SWEET!!

Moose
 
You sure you just aren't BS'n about the 'Nut. I mean, others have tried to roll the 'Nut, but just didn't have it.

Moose

Mango, baby. Mango.

MangoPatina.jpg
 
I've broke all kinds of stuff under warranty using it the wrong way. It gets put on the shelf of the stupid stuff that I have done. It's a big shelf. Maybe one day I'll learn. If I break something using it for it's intent, I'll contact the manufacture to see what can be done to get back up and running. Y'all er not going to ask me to stop buying you knives are you? :o

Life time warranty on all ESEE knives!**




** Just don't buy one, throw with it, break it, send it in for warranty, and then admit your douchebaggery to the ESEE staff. Or you'll be quoted in the "Thread of Dumb Asses and Shame.
 
Remember when Schrade/Uncle Henry had the 1 year loss warranty, if you lost the knife within 1 year of purchase, they replaced it no questions asked, but once, that was it.

Jeff why not try something similar, anyone who repeatably abuses a knife because they're too lazy to use the right tool for the job would be limited to one replacement per purchase, if the knife keeps breakin' on 'em either your product has QC issues, (not likely by what I have seen) or the people abusin' your knives don't deserve to have a quality product like yours Jeff.

Another thing, what idiot throws their knife away in the woods, with all the throwin' knives out there why not buy one meant for throwin' at least the softer steel would bend and not break, (why not make a throwin' knife.

I bought one of your knives without even knowin' about the warranty, it's nice that your that confident in your knives that you'll back 'em up unconditionally, you guys make a top notch knife and should be proud of what you make.

Along the lines of my last comment why abuse your knife to that extent on purpose, use within' the parameters that it was meant to be used and there won't be a problem, I don't baby my work knives but I do take care of 'em, I want to know that they're there when I need 'em.

I think it should be a law that anyone who possesses a knife, car or anything with moving parts has to at least pass a basic intelligence test. If you don't know the square root of 100 then you're off the team, taken out to the courtyard, and quickly shot.

Here's a test to give 'em, if they have even the least bit of intelligence they'll pass this test.

NAME: ___________________________________________________________________________

1. Read all of the following directions before you do anything.

2. Print your name, last name first then your first name and middle initial (if you have one), at the top of the page.

3. Draw a line through the word "all" in direction 1.

4. Underline the word "directions" in direction 1.

5. In direction 2, circle the words "your first name."

6. In direction 3, place an "X" in front of the word "through."

7. Cross out the numbers of the even-numbered directions above.

8. In direction 7, cross out the word "above" and write the word "below" above it.

9. Write "Following directions is easy" under your name at the top of the page.

10. In direction 9, add the following sentence after the word "page": "That's what you think!"

11. Draw a square in the upper right-hand corner of this page.

12. Draw a triangle in the lower left-hand corner of this page.

13. Place a circle in the center of the square.

14. Place an "x" in the center of the triangle.

15. Now that you have read all of the directions as instructed in direction 1, follow directions 2 and 16 only.

16. Please do not give away what this test is about by saying anything or doing anything to alert your classmates. If you have reached this direction, make believe you are still writing. See how many of your classmates really know how to follow directions.
 
Me personally ESEE warranty is great but I would probaly never send a knife back in. Mostly because I have hardly ever broke a knife. And if I did I knew I was doing something wrong with it.
 
I just broke an AH-1 using it as a hook on the end of the winch cable while trying to get my 4WD unstuck.

Where do I send it for replacement.... Dumb Asses United?????

;)
 
NAME: Wade, Charles K.___________________________________________________________________________

1. Read all of the following directions before you do anything.

2. Print your name, last name first then your first name and middle initial (if you have one), at the top of the page.

3. Draw a line through the word "all" in direction 1.

4. Underline the word "directions" in direction 1.

5. In direction 2, circle the words "your first name."

6. In direction 3, place an "X" in front of the word "through."

7. Cross out the numbers of the even-numbered directions above.

8. In direction 7, cross out the word "above" and write the word "below" above it.

9. Write "Following directions is easy" under your name at the top of the page.

10. In direction 9, add the following sentence after the word "page": "That's what you think!"

11. Draw a square in the upper right-hand corner of this page.

12. Draw a triangle in the lower left-hand corner of this page.

13. Place a circle in the center of the square.

14. Place an "x" in the center of the triangle.

15. Now that you have read all of the directions as instructed in direction 1, follow directions 2 and 16 only.

16. Please do not give away what this test is about by saying anything or doing anything to alert your classmates. If you have reached this direction, make believe you are still writing. See how many of your classmates really know how to follow directions.

What do I win? :D
 
Wow, this thread has generated a lot of commentary I feel I need to share...

I don't know what it is about the Izula, but everyone I've shown it to says, "Oh, wow, that's a nice little thrower". I have no idea why... It would be terrible off balance, the blade is offset from the handle... What the snap is wrong with people?

I was telling my buddy David about the warranty. Saying, "The company that makes it is awesome too. If you ever break it they replace it no questions asked."

His first response? "We should go throw it at the tree."

Yeah, I don't really know what's wrong with people. I mean, I've thrown knives at trees before... They were just generally knives I didn't care about, or when I was 10-12 and shouldn't have been snaping with them in the first place. I mean, I see where you're coming from about these guys having the internet and learning not to throw my knives, but most of my knowledge about what abuses and breaks knives comes from learning it the hardway.

I'm also confused by the people who view throwing knives as some kind of tactical approach or something. I mean, throwing for hobby is one thing... I don't hunt or kill people, but I like to target shoot. I can understand doing something like that just for fun, but people talking about, "Well, if your last ditch effort has to be throwing the knife," kind of amaze me.

I remember one of my grandfather's friends telling me about throwing a bowie knife into a hog's back when he was young. I listened to him for a few minutes, and I asked, "So are you really good at throwing knives?" and he said, "No, all that knife throwing crap in the movies is bullshit, I was just hoping it was heavy enough to distract him a little so I could run for a tree!" and the whole room burst out laughing. Anyway, I always remember that story when knife throwing comes up.

I've had to use my Izula as a prybar this winter because the hatch on my gas tank became frozen shut and I ran out of gas. I basically half in the middle, and half on the shoulder of a 45 MPH, narrow country road that drunks drive all the time, in some very bad snow/fog and there was ice on the road. It wasn't exactly life or death, but there was a pretty high probability I could get smacked into by someone. I always carry a gas can, but hatch had about half an inch of ice just on top of the car surface. I don't even know how someone could break one of those things, 'cause it laughed at hard ice and 1/16" sheet metal in 18 F weather. My thinking wasn't really, "Oh, this knife has a good warranty, so if it breaks I can just get a knew one." I had it, and my Kulgera which I didn't think could do the job. Even for the brief moment where I considered the cost, I thought, "Well, the Izula was $50, and I'm sure a tow job would probably be more out here, plus the longer the time I have to spend out here waiting to get creamed." I didn't really consider the warranty all that much until I was done and thought, "Well, let's see if I bent it," but the only damage was some scuffing on the coating and a little dent on the tip. I don't know how people can break these things without trying to--even if you're abusing them, you've got to go ape shit from what I can tell having decimated sheet metal and ice. I mean... I wasn't gong wanton with brute force, since it was the only tool I had at that point to get the heck out of there, but since having used it for that whenever I even hear someone mention an Izula breaking I think, "Okay, so what dumbass thing were you doing with it?"

That's just speaking for the Izula though, I haven't tried any of the other models. I'm sure they're just as tough from what I've read though; not that I'm going to go out and test them. I don't really like the idea of testing knives myself. I mean, if people want to put themselves on the line doing that kind of stuff that's okay I guess, but in most of the testing I've seen the people are far more likely to be seriously injured than the knives are.

I think the warranty is a good thing to have as a company though. I hear you guys talk about the fact that there's more good people out there than bad and I like that idea, and I think it holds true to the general community that is going to be interested in buying your knives. There's probably a 1,000:1 ratio between people who will appreciate a good tool and a warranty like this and those who will just try to abuse the warranty by breaking them. Then when you consider how many more people there are out there that still might buy an ESEE, I don't really see that ratio growing in an unfavorable way. If it's suddenly 10,000:10 that's still a lot better for ESEE, and probably us in the long run since that means more knives. Better to let a couple of assholes slip through the cracks than to penalize the masses.

P.S.
I doubt I'd send my Izula in unless something catastrophic happened to it. I'd send other knives in if the tip broke off, but even then I'd probably just get a new Izula if that happened to me. Then I'd have two Izulas with different blade shapes!
 
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What do I win? :D

The satisfaction of knowin' you at least have some degree of intelligence above the guy who the OP is about.:D

I took this test as the first part of the Port Authority Bridge and Tunnel Maintenance test, outta 65 people who took that part of the test, I was one of 37 people who moved onto the next test.:confused::D
 
I just broke an AH-1 using it as a hook on the end of the winch cable while trying to get my 4WD unstuck.

Where do I send it for replacement.... Dumb Asses United?????

;)

Since I knew the warranty was there and I was in a real hurry to get unstuck, I also used my snatch block to double the load. I can't figure out for the life of me why my AH-1 broke???:D
 
The satisfaction of knowin' you at least have some degree of intelligence above the guy who the OP is about.:D

I took this test as the first part of the Port Authority Bridge and Tunnel Maintenance test, outta 65 people who took that part of the test, I was one of 37 people who moved onto the next test.:confused::D

My elementary school teachers used to spring tests like those on us all the time.....glad I still read my directions. :D

And, it doesn't take much to have more intelligence than the guy in the OP.

Hell, if they want the Izula thrown the wouldn't have named it after an ant. It would've been a Monarch, like a butterfly or something. ;)
 
just read this thread and cant beleave what i reed..

hey, wasn't there a guy who cut is ESEE with a blow torch and got a new knife with the warrenty.. i mean, what good can cutting your ESEE with a blow torch can procure other than.. duh.. cuting it in half ?

now.. i can't wait to throw my new limited edition hest folder at trees :) [kidding of course]
 
Good work Jeff. People are idiots.

When I worked at a knife shot a guy came in and tried to exchange a benchmade because a good 1/4in of the blade had been snapped off. I asked him what happened and he said "I was really drunk last weekend and kept throwing it into a tree and it broke." Needless to say I didnt take the knife back.
 
Sometimes I find myself wishing...nay, praying that stupidity was painful. If it hurt to be stupid, we'd have a lot fewer stupid people.

I for one, hope to never have to use ESEE's warranty. Because if I do, then obviously my day didn't turn out the way I had hoped!

But on a lighter note, I got to read the words "douchebaggery" and "tacticsexual" in this thread. I will use both in a sentence tomorrow! :D
 
Since I knew the warranty was there and I was in a real hurry to get unstuck, I also used my snatch block to double the load. I can't figure out for the life of me why my AH-1 broke???:D
Amen........ ;)
 
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I think it should be a law that anyone who possesses a knife, car or anything with moving parts has to at least pass a basic intelligence test. If you don't know the square root of 100 then you're off the team, taken out to the courtyard, and quickly shot.


:eek:

10

:p
 
Hmmmm.....
My response would've been more like:
Thanks for the kind words.... I'm glad you enjoy our products...... just so you know.... throwing our knives isn't exactly what we had in mind when we designed our warrantee or our knives for that matter..... don't recommend it........ if he breaks it again ...... might/will not guarantee it..... etc.
You either stand behind the warrantee or not. This kind of stuff will happen but you sell a shitload of knives and you have a huge fan base, which includes many "fanboys" and "mall-ninjas" etc. It probably makes these guy's feel indestructable to have "indestructable" knives and "use" them like they are. The "survival" part is just plain bullshit and obfuscation.... how many ratpack members are "using" and "abusing" their knives in a "survival" situation? Just add that as a clause to your warrantee, or warn this guy and move on. Or remove the following and watch the carnage ensue.
"LIFETIME GUARANTEE AGAINST ABUSE AND BREAKAGE"

You gots to teach the silly chilren.... not beerate 'em!:D
Just sayin.
 
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