Apology PLEASE READ

Thanks cziv for making something out of that non structured mess, my brains so fried out I don't know how to do anything n e more:D
What does OP mean I see I am referred to that several times. Also I fully agree these words don't mean a thing until restitutution is made and even then meaningless. Behavior means something. I wanted to come clean about it all, I think it was owed to jaydev and the erest of you involved. Although I know I am sorry you do not nor will you begin to think so and you are correct in that, it's common sense. Please think of all of this as a confession, and explanation not an apology so much. Also I put my drug history and recovery things on here because I was directly asked, I do not regret it but please do not say disrespectful and dirogatory things about that. There are alot of recovering people out there and on this forum and for people to say things that imply I somehow represent all those people, and we are all low lives and crap like that it is very offensive to people who have done nothing to deserve that. You can throw all the crap sandwiches at me but do not generalize. True strength of charactor is recognizing charactor defects and having the stones and fortitude to do something about it. I am by no means saying I am in that class yet. But I do recognize and want to undergo the change process. I dont know if that came out anything close to right but just remember when you say worthless drug addicts or junkies you might be causing something you don't wish. The person who has put all the years of leg work into themselves will be much more offended than me the guy on the chopping block who still feels that way about myself to an extent. This thread can only go two ways, burning me at the stake or saying productive things that might teach people something and save someone the anguish I cause Jason for so long..
 
I agree with everything brandon says, i said i was gonna stay out of this thread, but reading it just now and seeing how Brandon is trying to look out for the community, Yes he is getting riled up, but he has good reason, this is peoples hard earned cash we are talking about here, and hes just saying he doesn't want to see this happen again, so why is he the bad guy here??? I mean C'mon one guy steals from a member admits to doing so,and another member says he wants the offender banned and all the sudden he's a bad guy for looking out for the rest of us??? Yes his choice of words may be aggressive, but who isn't aggressive when they feel passionate about something. I agree with Brandon and say we need more members like him looking out for the community as a whole. My first trade in the exchange i was told it was based on the "honor" system, that's really all we have is our word and trust, and the feedback score, when you admit your a thief your honor is gone, in the "honor" system, therefore you have no business in the bladeforums community anymore.
 
I hope you are able to successfully turn your life around. I wish you all the best and I appreciate your post, not a lot of thieves can be so honest about what they have done as you have.
 
sogtrident7 said:
...I think this thread is a very useful thing to the community and I believe as far off track and nasty it's gotten at times the mods understand that and that's why they have even allowed it to continue.
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Among many flags, this statement stands out to me: the Original Poster's assumption that he has a platform from which to address the good of this community and to provide instruction to its members.

That said, this thread will remain in the archives as evidence of the value of words without actions, from this point forward.

~ P.
 
brandon said:
You see man, I do know where the OP is coming from. Recovery brought me out of my hopeless downward spiral fifteen years ago. Am I perfect, not by a long shot.

The fact remains, this thread was posted because he got caught. If you believe anything else you are deluding yourself. It's nice that he's man enough to admit to his dope sick behavior, but without repercusssions, he will do it time and time again, here, and in real life.
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+1 & for the record I never wished him dead.I just wish he wasn't allowed here anymore.You can NEVER,EVER trust a junkie,recovered or not.
 
What you did was extremely wrong, but you seem to know that already. I am glad you chose to issue a formal apology to Jason and the community. Unfortunately this apology is in regards to a thoughtfully constructed lie on your behalf, so we can only hope this apology isn't yet another untruth. It will take a lot of time to rebuild trust with many in the community, and many may never trust you again; it is unfortunate. Anyway, I wish the best for you and for Jason.
 
Thank you for the OP clarification. Also Allen I agree with you that the exchange is based on the honer system. I have no business trading or anything but is the whole site,say general knife discussion based on that same system? You might not like me or my choices but if not than take what I say with a grain of salt like you would with any other member you disagree with. I am not here to scam people, if so I would'nt have gone to this length on this thread. I wouldnt have done anything as a matter of fact. I know brandon thinks what he is doing is right and some may agree but his delivery isn't agressive it's over the top. There have been 30 other people saying the same thing without wishing death on me or offending and arguing with other who don't appreciate his language I think thats how he made himself the bad guy, I didn't see anyone else having problems with people or mods who were saying the exact same thing. I don't want to trade or buy or anything on this site. I think I have said this in every post. This is about Taking a wrong I imposed on someone and trying to do the best I know how to make it a little better.
 
jtr357 you can never ever trust a junkie recovered or not is the most ignorant self richeos statement I've ever heard. U prolly use the N word and have a rebel flag hanging over your bed too huh. Thats sickening taking an entire class of people and saying they are worthless. No wait I think thats predjudice.
 
I'm done here I thank everyone for their responses, positive or not. I think it was a topic that needed addressed in this way on here. But this is becoming a slugging match. I did a rude nasty calculated thing, I want to make it right it's as easy as that. I don't belong trading anything nor will I. If I go into the exchange it will be to read or give something away. To all of you out there who are perfect and piss excellence, I'm sorry the idea of repentance, or acceptance, or earned forgiveness evades you so put me in the ignore list and move on. If me being a member on here and commenting on posts here and there is the worst part of your day you really do have it made. I expect or ask nothing of anyone, there are people who hate me and there are people who don't mind me being here, would like to see the repayment but will never do trading with me and there are people who have been where I am can empathize and are willing to see what happens and wish me well and be helpfull. I understand it all. The funny part is that Jason falls into the latter, I dont know if he struggled with anything but he is very supportive and willing to help and it isn't to get his $ back it is because he is a good man and it's people like that I want to learn behavior from. That being said carry on but hatred takes up alot of real-estate in the head that most of us can't afford to give up. it will be posted on here when Jason is made whole again.
 
Keep on keeping on sigtrident. Try not to take some of the more ignorant statements to heart. Some people see the world as black and white. Good and evil. Left and right. Yes you've broken trust and should probably be banned from at least the exchange. And like I said earlier, coming clean and making it right with Jaydev doesn't make what you did any less wrong but it does count for something.
 
sogtrident7 said:
jtr357 you can never ever trust a junkie recovered or not is the most ignorant self richeos statement I've ever heard. U prolly use the N word and have a rebel flag hanging over your bed too huh. Thats sickening taking an entire class of people and saying they are worthless. No wait I think thats predjudice.
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Didn't say they were worthless,just can't trustem'...junkie.I've been burned before trying to help people like you,listening to their lies.Never again.
I'm not even going to address your other statements.
 
sogtrident7 said:
jtr357 you can never ever trust a junkie recovered or not is the most ignorant self richeos statement I've ever heard. U prolly use the N word and have a rebel flag hanging over your bed too huh. Thats sickening taking an entire class of people and saying they are worthless. No wait I think thats predjudice.
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Being a "former" junkie is one thing, being a liar and a thief is quite another, apologies or not.
 
sogtrident7 said:
jtr357 you can never ever trust a junkie recovered or not is the most ignorant self richeos statement I've ever heard. U prolly use the N word and have a rebel flag hanging over your bed too huh. Thats sickening taking an entire class of people and saying they are worthless. No wait I think thats predjudice.
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I'll be happy to generalize & say that junkies are mostly worthless scumbag pieces of human trash. Especially thieving junkies. This is the verdict reached from my very costly experiences with them. You don't have a soap box to get up on & act offended here. You have no moral high ground to take. You're a criminal (who got away with it) begging to be allowed to stay at the scene of the crime. Your self-righteous, pseudo-PC indignation on behalf of fellow junkies says plenty, none of it good. You seem to have a ton of empathy & for the criminal & none for their victims.

Why should we have to go through all of this drama & special effort for some junkie who racked up less than 20 posts (mostly in the Exchange) before robbing a member of this forum? Guys get banned for rudeness. What do we owe you? What makes you special? You can lurk here with no membership & read to your heart's contentment. The fact that many good members don't want you on their forum counts less to you than what you want right now. On top of stealing, you've made your problem our problem & I resent that.
 
Honestly, I don't have the time/patience to read through this whole thread; but I do respect an honest apology when it is followed up by a real restitution and permanent change in actions and character. Easy to do, no, but it can happen. I hope you are one of the ones who can do it. Having worked with thieves, cheats, crooks, and junkies I understand why some folks here still don't trust you; you will have to work hard to prove yourself worthy, and some will never forgive you no matter what. In the end, if you really want to change it will have to be something that you do for yourself and your own self respect. You will probably need help from others as well to keep you on the right path; lying is a tough habit to break. Best of luck to you.
 
geargeek said:
Honestly, I don't have the time/patience to read through this whole thread; but I do respect an honest apology when it is followed up by a real restitution and permanent change in actions and character.
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The interesting thing being, this is no longer even an apology:

sogtrident7 said:
Please think of all of this as a confession, and explanation not an apology so much.
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I hope Jaydev is reimbursed for his loss.

~ P.
 
sogtrident7 said:
U prolly use the N word and have a rebel flag hanging over your bed too huh.
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i got one of the confederate flags as my avatar and a bonnie blue flag sticker on my car, does that make me a racist? course i don't see the confederate flags the way allot of folks do. history is written by the victor, and while allot of what they wrote is entirely true, there is also allot they left out. it's funny how selective folks can be with history. for example......the spanish were masters of the slavery business and the spanish ruled over florida for a long time....they were quite brutal to the s. american people. no one in america......casts that flag as a symbol of hatred. better example is the american flag flown while killing native americans.....no one in america thinks native american killer when they see the american flag, except for maybe the natives. point being is a flag represents allot of things, not just one aspects of a culture or society. this ain't the right place or time for that discussion though.......

i learned as a young man taught to me by an old florida boy, "judge folks on who they are, not what they are." if flying my flags makes me a bad man...so be it.

all that said, on your current apology....remember actions speak louder than words. as said by others here, talk is cheap. it's a man's actions that show who he is, not his mouth alone. i can't applaud you yet, cause it's all lip service at this point.

good start at least, let's see if you can prove all these fellows wrong.......i hope you can. everyone should get a second chance, but it's not given, it has to be earned.
 
Apologizes are words, deeds are actions.

words are talk and talk is cheap

You "say" you learned a lesson, only time will tell and there has been very little time for me to sing your praises for starting to do something the right way
 
sogtrident7 said:
I am going to post this in a few places on here because I want as much of the community to see it as I can. (( merged ))

I would like to start by saying I'm sorry first and foremost to Jaydev for my actions. They where nasty and 100% undeserved. I will get back to that in a minute. Also I want to apologize to you people in this great community. For the most part you all have good integrity and I want in time to become a part of that. I thouroghly enjoy reading, learning, and enjoying the knife collector community. Like any community you have alot of good people with some dishonest, scamming, and thieving people sprinkled in here and there. I have as of late developed a reputaion as the latter and well deserved at that.

About 10 months or so ago now Jaydev and I on another forum met and started talking and made a trade. It was a Spyderco Manix Sprint run s90v on my end for a Gold class B/M from his end. Everything went very smoothly as a matter of fact as alot of you know Jason is an outstanding guy and a pleasure to communicate and trade with. We talked a little more and decided to trade a Sebenza for his Ritter/Wilkins Grip. Along the way I decided somewhere to screw him out of his knife, it was by no means anything to do with him.

It came shipping day and he went to the post office and shipped his knife and I went and shipped a lamp to flashlight. I shipped the lamp because #1 I could show a tracking # that I did ship out something and #2 I could start to build a bs story. Needless to say I got the knife as promised and a day or so later I got an E-mail or call I cant remember which, but he was quite displeased and I lied and said my wife shipped out for me and got two items mixed up and knife went to a friend of mine who would ship it back and I would in turn ship to Jason. All bs, I also said I never recieved his knife, he did have delivery confirmation but no signature. I guess in my mind it left that tiny bit of doubt so I could skate out without a huge issue. To sum it up I insisted that I never recieved the knife, so obviously "why would I send you mine you probably where trying to screw me" is what I said and he kept on me for a month or so and then it stopped.

I knew there really isnt anything you can do on a bad trade online. I guess call local law enforcement who will laugh it off. Or in my case I was on probation and on the thread that was started about this incident they were talking about calling my P.O. who to be honest wouldnt have cared less considering his case load is in the thousand something range and also I was originally scheduled off probation on January 13th but I completed all the conditions and he was busy and didn't want to schedule me again so I was let off a month early.

So I was going to use the knife as an edc but after I got it I felt very guilty and locked it up in the safe instead. So I was off the forums for a while and then I got on here and started doing some trading again. One of the knives on the trade block was Jasons, he saw and from what I understand got ahold of the guy who traded for it and he offered to give it back to Jason free of charge but Jason ended up buying it back from him. So this thread started on here about all this and I lied to all you people in the thread, which was absolutely pointless because it was pretty cut and dried what happened.

So Esav sent me an email saying he was blocking me until we get this resolved. I couldn't do it anymore. See I'm turning the page in my life and stopping alot of old behaviors that have kept me in ignorance and kept me manipulating people to get what I want. I'm the worst kind of theif too because I can come accross as the nicest guy you've ever met and then blindside you, just like with Jason. If you were to ask him what kind of guy I was after the first trade we made he would have said outstanding. Back to what happened, I contacted Jason gave probably a worthless apology (not unlike this one) and he responded with outstanding charactor and we are working together to get this monetarily taken care of. I will pay the original price plus the price he purchased the knife back for. I can't say enough good about Jason we are lucky to have guys like him around, he has been respectful to me and has gone beyond to help me get on the right track. We actually communicate in a friendly manner about all sorts of things a couple timies a week.

So all that being said I hope you guys will at least let me stay around and perhaps start the trade and buy end at some point as well. Jason has offered to middle man trades for me if need be, also I would be willing to send my item and upon recipt and inspection of mine then send yours. It will take time to build trust again. Now I want to say I have started a good job about three weeks ago and my main source of income is commission with a small amount of weekly pay. So I have not paid Jason yet we have planned the date I get paid my comission and I keep in close contact with him. So obviously no buying or n e thing till he is squared away.

I guess that is all. I tried to be as candid and honest as I could and I know some probably most will think too bad stuff it up your ass. I understand that and can't say my reaction would be any different, but I have been let back on here pending evening up with Jason and I expect I will be under close scruitiny as well by some of you and mods too. I am not trying to lay a bs line on anyone here nor am I in any way excusing my behavior, also am asking nothing from any one just an opportunity to be here we'll say as a rehabelitated member of your community. Thanks for taking the time and reading and I hope if this stops somebody else from screwing somebody I guess it was worth it.

Thanks, Ben...My spell check won't work either so sorry bout that..
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sogtrident7 said:
Thank you for the OP clarification. Also Allen I agree with you that the exchange is based on the honer system. I have no business trading or anything but is the whole site,say general knife discussion based on that same system? You might not like me or my choices but if not than take what I say with a grain of salt like you would with any other member you disagree with. I am not here to scam people, if so I would'nt have gone to this length on this thread. I wouldnt have done anything as a matter of fact. I know brandon thinks what he is doing is right and some may agree but his delivery isn't agressive it's over the top. There have been 30 other people saying the same thing without wishing death on me or offending and arguing with other who don't appreciate his language I think thats how he made himself the bad guy, I didn't see anyone else having problems with people or mods who were saying the exact same thing. I don't want to trade or buy or anything on this site. I think I have said this in every post. This is about Taking a wrong I imposed on someone and trying to do the best I know how to make it a little better.
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One of the most difficult things about being a bullshitter, is keeping your line of bullshit straight.

Leadfoot
 
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