favorite quotes or analogies

OK...maybe a few, but just because I 'resemble' a lot of the ones I see here.

-"Shoot fire and save the matches!"
-"He's missing a few crayons from his box."
-"...not the brightest bulb."

Ah, nostalgia.
 
A friend of mine came in to a meeting at work a little hung over from the company outing the night before. My managing attorney said, "Trevor, you look like a hell this morning," and he said "Yeah, I feel like a bag of dicks." That one got a laugh.
 
Favorite quotes:

I’m a secular priest ordained by training, experience, and, most important, the willingness to accept the mantle of command. That willingness encompasses the realization that failure is easy, and such failure could kill me or, worse, kill someone else. It’s the nature of society that I’m considered unworthy of huge financial reward for that risk. But what can be earned is a certain nobility – not in the sense of aristocratic status but in the sense of striving for quality and dignity of behavior and living.
- Peter Leschak Wildland firefighter
I see many professions in this quote though - KR


"The difference between 'involvement' and 'commitment' is like a bacon and eggs breakfast: the chicken was 'involved' - the pig was 'committed'."
- unknown

“I'll keep it short and sweet -- Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.”
- Montgomery Burns talking about business to a class of 8 year olds

“Haven’t I made it abundantly clear during the tenure of our friendship that I don’t know s**t?”
- Brodie (Jason Lee), “Mallrats”

"People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf."
- George Orwell


KR
 
"Under a bad coat there is often a good drinker". Omar Khayam.

"I spent almost all my money out of alcohol and as women; the remainder i wasted it". George Best.
 
"Well, wish in one hand, S**T in the other and see which one fills up first"

During a hard rain here in Indiana... "Like a cow pissin' on a flat rock"
 
"That guy is f@cked up like a football bat"

"That guy is a soup(or sh*t) sandwich"

-Blair
 
"As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly!"



"You knew the job was dangerous when you took it, Fred!"


-- FLIX
 
-more f@#ked up than a one man rock fight!
-...look at him,just as happy as if he had a brain
-that was harder than stuffin' a cat in a toilet
-Number than a winter stump(still don't get that one)
-more nervous than a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs
-that was about as funny as a train wreck
 
-The best part of him ran down the crack of his mothers ass.

- I feel like 10 pounds of s..t in a five pound bag.

- I was hornier than a four peckered owl on a saturday night.


These were from years ago, I try to avoid using them now.
 
Aim low, Reach your goals.

I may not agree with that you say, but i will fight to the death for your right to say it.
 
If there are no dogs in heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went!

I have this as my Marquee screen saver
 
"You're the one fuckin' this goat, I'm just holdin' the horns!"

"An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure."

"Proper prior planning prevents piss poor performance"

That's all I can think of at the moment. -Matt-
 
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