Uncle Timbo
Gold Member
Why not? We have to keep our humor.
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Knives and Toilet Paper?
- Thread starter Uncle Timbo
- Start date
No toilet paper left.... just have to let it dry and scrap it off with a knife. Watch the tips/points. 
Maybe there is a use for dull knives after all.
Maybe there is a use for dull knives after all.
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DocJD
Basic Member
Maybe a "butt-er" knife , when the Charmin is history ? 
Edit: Discovered reason for TP shortage :https://www.dailyhaha.com/_pics/worst-nightmare.htm
Edit: Discovered reason for TP shortage :https://www.dailyhaha.com/_pics/worst-nightmare.htm
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Uncle Timbo
Gold Member
Yea, I see what you mean. It does look a little....crappy.Sorry for bad picture
(sorry but I couldn't help myself)
If we can't try to find a little humor in all of this then we have no hope. I pray numerous times daily to God for this all to be over soon.
Uncle Timbo
Gold Member
No, I don't buy it. Those sweet doggies did not RIP up all that TP.Maybe a "butt-er" knife , when the Charmin is history ?
Edit: Discovered reason for TP shortage :https://www.dailyhaha.com/_pics/worst-nightmare.htm
We have to keep our TP elevated so our cats don't decide to spend the night ripping up TP. We have been blessed with that sight more than once in the AM. It is usually just one roll however. The cute doggies could certainly lay waste to a lot of TP.Maybe a "butt-er" knife , when the Charmin is history ?
Edit: Discovered reason for TP shortage :https://www.dailyhaha.com/_pics/worst-nightmare.htm
A butt-er knife might be the answer. Good one! For some reason, I keep thinking apple butter.
I pray that the virus peters out very soon. I have had zero business since the first case in TN.
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DocJD
Basic Member
We used to have a cat that loved to attack , completely unroll off the holder and shred .
Only marginally cute , the first time .
OK Timbo , I'll play .............
I hear that sharpening at midnight gives the best results .........even 5160 can cut
Use water, fellows. use water
Velitrius
Gold Member
We used to have a cat that loved to attack , completely unroll off the holder and shred .
Only marginally cute , the first time .
Cat-Astrophic indeed. I'd have made Cornish Game Cat in our current state of affairs.
Use water, fellows. use water
As my orifice from "down unda" might say.... "Bidet, Mate!"
Hickory n steel
Gold Member
As someone who only has 4 rolls left I can tell you that you're absolutely right.
Stores get small amounts of things in stock here and there, but understandably seniors get first pick then the scavengers sweep right in and clear the rest out.
I had to go to the grocery store today and it was not a sight to make light of.
Chronovore
Gold Member
The only toilet paper I could get this week was the kind with lotion. While not as bad as the scented kind, it's pretty bad.
The main additive is mineral oil. Maybe I could use it as a knife wipe?
The main additive is mineral oil. Maybe I could use it as a knife wipe?
Use this as a learning experience, plan ahead. After all, it's just TP..... $20-$25 worth would last you months (one of those big multi-roll packs that fills up the whole back seat of a car).
Seriously. I'm not sure why people don't have a months worth of TP on hand at any given time. I bet many will now. People will walk around with a thousand dollar phone in their pocket but can't be bothered to have $30 of TP in their dwelling? Forget about having enough food for a prolonged stay at home. And water in an emergency? Nope.
Uncle Timbo
Gold Member
Thanks everybody. I realize a worldly pandemic is not funny but I heard the CDC was asking us to try to keep some form of a sense of humor. I'll try to find that.
We have a kitty who would sit on the throne and paw the roll of TP until all of it was on the floor. Then she was done. We started turning the roll around so it wouldn't "pay out" on the floor.
I went to our grocery store when they opened in the morning and was able to buy (2) 24 roll packages. (2 limit)
They clean and stock at night.
One other thought before I let y'all go, I'm not a glass half empty or half full kinda guy.
I'm a cup runneth over kind of hillbilly from WV. The good Lord above will see us through.
We have a kitty who would sit on the throne and paw the roll of TP until all of it was on the floor. Then she was done. We started turning the roll around so it wouldn't "pay out" on the floor.
I went to our grocery store when they opened in the morning and was able to buy (2) 24 roll packages. (2 limit)
They clean and stock at night.
One other thought before I let y'all go, I'm not a glass half empty or half full kinda guy.
I'm a cup runneth over kind of hillbilly from WV. The good Lord above will see us through.
Uncle Timbo
Gold Member
The preppers of the world are "somewhat" ready for this.