Rocketed into outer Snark

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Lighten the mood a bit...

A crusty old Marine Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young idealistic liberal ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation.

"Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?" "Negative, ma'am, just serious by nature." The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action." "Yes ma'am, a lot of action."

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself." The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner. Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when was the last time you had sex?" "1955 ma'am" he replied. "Well, there you are", she said. "No wonder you're so serious. You really need to chill out and relax! I mean no sex since 1955! Come with me."

She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him several times. Afterward, panting for breath, she leaned against his grizzled chest and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955."

The Sergeant Major said in his serious voice, after glancing at his watch, "I hope not; it's only 2130 now."
 
Double tap, at a different time. How does that happen?
 
Reading comprehension in general leaves a good bit to be desired these days... that's really unfortunate. It's awfully difficult to communicate when people only "hear" what they already "think they know is going to be said".

Chameleonbear said:
Terrio, GFY.
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That's helpful. :rolleyes:

mountainmist said:
Telling me that I make all hunters look like trigger-happy morons...
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That's not what I said at all, my young friend... go back and look at my posts again. Take your time and think it through. If I was unclear, just ask... I'll be happy to clarify. But don't put your emotional spin on what you "assume" I'm thinking.

I'm not trying to be anyone's parent or boss or anything remotely like that! Good grief, I have enough on my plate without mucking around in that endless swamp. But I will say what's on my mind while listening to other points-of-view. If that's taken "the wrong way"... so be it. You'll get over it. *shrug*
 
What the hell?... Where am I?...

Please ignore this post.
I thought this was the snark thread....
 
james terrio said:
If a snark falls in the forest and no one hears it, is it still a snark?

:confused:
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This is one of lifes great mysteries.
I'll go with my gut on this one and say.....yes?
Wait, wait...How big is said snark? Bigger than a bread box?
Because I might change my answer if it is. :D
 
Not to derail any conversation, but if any of youz guyz like tools and sharp knives you should definitely check out the ken onion worksharp. I am not a fan of sharpening jigs, gadgets, etc etc, I like what can be done to an edge with a simple stone and elbow grease, but this KO WS is really growing on me. It isn't a magical cure all or anything but it does a pretty good job of producing a good ol convex edge with a little bit of practice. I am probably not using it like it was prescribed but I like it. It will never replace my wet rocks, but for a tool to reset an edge, convex it, and do it fast its a fantastic tool sharpener. It also worked wonders on my bigger blades. I'll have to take some pics for y'all here in a minute.
 
Chameleonbear said:
Did someone mention bacon?
http://baconfestchicago.com/about-baconfest/
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100-250 for a ticket??

You know how much bacon that will buy???? Man id never pay that much for a single ticket to go to ANY event, theme park, sports game, even bladeshow... NADA.

BUT.... I just seen it looks like they donate some of that money to charity... SO thats good. I may would go knowing its for charity.

After all i did just spent 50 bucks on a little tub of spicy seasoning.. but only because it goes to a really good cause. Hate dust raised 22,000 dollars in 1 hour of sales on Saturday. They had already donated over 140 grand in just over 1 years time as well.
 
tradewater said:
Here! Here! I'd like to throw in leather, Hoppe's No. 9 and fine axes.
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Let's not forget old dogs, children and watermelon wine. :thumbup:

[video=youtube;-FU_TuwM2Dw]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-FU_TuwM2Dw[/video]

I've never had watermelon wine, but eventually I will... if I live long enough. Miss Angie and I spent some time yesterday racking off our first 5-gallon batch of it. Good gravy, that stuff throws dead yeast and pulp like nothing else I've ever seen! Based on what I'm seeing so far, I suspect it will be at least six months before it even begins to clarify.
 
worldwood said:
Lighten the mood a bit...

A crusty old Marine Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young idealistic liberal ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation.

"Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?" "Negative, ma'am, just serious by nature." The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action." "Yes ma'am, a lot of action."

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself." The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner. Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when was the last time you had sex?" "1955 ma'am" he replied. "Well, there you are", she said. "No wonder you're so serious. You really need to chill out and relax! I mean no sex since 1955! Come with me."

She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him several times. Afterward, panting for breath, she leaned against his grizzled chest and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955."

The Sergeant Major said in his serious voice, after glancing at his watch, "I hope not; it's only 2130 now."
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A classic!

Semper Fi!

 
TMHunt said:
My daughter is ADHD. I assure you its very real, however, it is NOT the same a autism. Its easy to make assumptions or accusations about them if you know nothing about it and have not parented a child that has any of these. That's all I'm gonna say on the subject.

O.k. one more comment, just for the record, my children are very well behaved out in public. But that because that's what we expect out of them as there parents. ADHD HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT. Its not a behavioral disorder.

Autism, is a entirely different animal.
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My youngest is also well behaved in public and, generally, at home. But I don't say "squirrel!" to her for nothing. ADD can be funny as hell, tho......
A few years ago, both my girls were sitting having lunch. The little one was having a hard boiled egg. The older one, who has food allergies and can't have eggs, wrinkles her nose and says "eggs smell like farts!" The little one, thinks for a second about this and says: "I wonder what farts taste like?" whereupon I laughed so hard I'm surprised I didn't have a seizure. Distraction, impulsivity and creativity are only some of what goes with.
One Legged Josh said:
God Bless America, wool shirts, plastic guns, sharp knives, and good coffee.
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tradewater said:
Here! Here! I'd like to throw in leather, Hoppe's No. 9 and fine axes.
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You both forgot beer. And why do we always have to talk guns in snark, anyway? It's a BLADE forum. So unless you can build a shelter with those things or prepare dinner or trim your fingernails, quit it out. ;)
 
First, one last comment on the ADD/ADHD subject, while all of you are right in saying it's not an excuse, I will point out that does make a lot of thing more difficult, I'm ADHD and while for the most part I can control it, it does make paying attention difficult at times, again not am excuse just an observation. The biggest problem that stems from it though, at least for me, is it's hard for me to sit still without either tapping my foot, or drumming on something with my hands, which quickly brings a loud STOP THAT! from my mother and occasionally a quick slap on the back of the head from my dad :D

In other news, Happy Birthday to you Murph and all your Marine brothers, thank you for your service!
 
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