Weirdest Knife Story

When I use my fingers to check for sharpness, I feel for a bur along the entire edge both sides, then I feel the edge by running my thumb with light pressure of the side of the blade to feel for a sharpened blade versus an unfinished blade, works great and never cut myself, there are some pretty stupid people out there.
... then I feel the edge by running my thumb with light pressure of the side of the blade to feel for a sharpened blade versus an unfinished blade, [...] there are some pretty stupid people out there.

Problem is, you're using a good old-fashioned way of testing an edge that's based on understanding how sharp a knife can be. Other people who don't understand will see you running your finger along the edge and do what they think they just saw you do. :)
Luckily there were firemen on site and they called an ambulance as they took over from me and the kiosk guy. His wife was vomitting in the corner as families took their children away from the sceneand she was still saying ..WTF....Was he nuts...WTF......All in All a bad day for the fair...And I didn't get any funnel cake

OK. Your Turn :)

(( Sam, give me a break, we're in Blade Discussion, not Whine & Cheese! :) ))
O no batman, the man didn't get his funnel cakes, someone call superman and turn the clocks back (get us a video while you are there).

Esav your right, I'm just to smart for those sheeple.
I made a sheath knife for a guy and after showing it to him warned him 3 times how sharp it was... He said that was what he wanted and proceeded to lay his arm open in front of his wife and a large crowd of guys............IT took a trip to the hospital to close it up...carl...........
Kershaw Leek brand new out of the box.
I was talking to my friend about how damn sharp it was and another friend chimes in that he doesn't think its all that sharp picks it up off the coffee table and runs it across his arm... then again two inches lower... and then again two inches lower than that... I think he made it to the fourth pass before the blood started to leak out of the first one and then the second and then the third and so on.

next day I go to see him and he's got steri strips holding his arm together.
And he wants to know where to get a Leek!

I want to buy him one of those SAKs for kids with no sharp blade.

I have two stories...

Number One - When I was thirteen, (only a little while ago) I used to collect cheapo knives, and the occasional "combat" looking kitchen knife. Well one day after my uncle passed away, we goto a old storage room he had and start going through all the stuff, I find a old Buck. Now I'm all happy, especially as it was my first experience with a truly razor sharp knife. When the storage assistant comes by to ask what we're going to keep, I showed him the knife, a safe box, and some other random items. Now the guy looks at the knife and laughs (real @sshole) and says "Thank piece of crap wont do $hit for you" and pulls a Frost (?) fixed blade, about 8 inches long and says "Now THIS is a real knife".
I say "Well I'm happy with this". He pulls it out of my hand opens it and proceeds to stab it into a box sitting nearby. I was stupefied as to his boldness, but I assumed he would wind up making an ass of himself. Well anyway, the moron had stabbed into a box containing various pots and pans, the slipjoint closed, opening his fingers. His index finger was barely connected to his hand and his other fingers were gushing. A week later my mother called the facility and asked about his condition, he had been fired, and had had to receive 23 stitches.

Number Two - Using a old steak knife I had blunted, I was trying various spins and flips with it in my basement, well to make a short story shorter, despite being fully dull it still was able to transfer a great amount of force in a very small area. I dropped it and it fell and dislocated my toe. Lesson learned.
This happened to me this week...honest to goodness...I dont know how wierd it is but it never happened to me...

Early morning Bass fishing on Spider Lake in Northern Michigan. Just me the boat and casting buzz baits when suddenly out of the sky while Im reeling in...WHAM a dam seagull plucks my buzz bait out of the water and yep you guessed it hes hooked..good...

so I have this dam seagull flying in circles about 30 feet over my head firlmly attached to fresh new 8lb test line with a steel leader...this bird aint going away.....

No way Im cutting the line and letting a perfectly good steel leader and a BRAND NEW buzz bait fly off in some dumb rat with wings mouth...for the poor animal to suffer and die of starvation...but what to do...

well after about 20 minutes of playing my catch the bird settles in the water and I slowly start to reel in the line..( Dam those birds are big up close) BAD IDEA...Mr. Seagull catches on that I am reeling him in and takes to wing again...this time fouling in the line and careening and dive bombing me from now 15 feet...I let out more line...groan... I am sure now with all the racket the bird was making that the whole lake is watching me as I fire the engine on the boat and proceed to drag the bird under water in the wake for about five minutes to keep it from flying again and then kill the engine and whack it with an oar a couple of times and then very ungracefully grab a soggy wet HUGE BIRD and slit its throat with my knife..what a pain...

anyway..I was sure I was going to get a ticket for killing the bird but what the heck else could I do??? I skulked back to shore and parked the boat and snuck back into the wife was wonder why I was home so early....Long story I told her...and no ticket...must happen more than once i figgured...
this is just THE BEGINNING

"....proceed to drag the bird under water in the wake for about five minutes to keep it from flying again...whack it with an oar a couple of times...and then very ungracefully grab a soggy wet HUGE BIRD and slit its throat with my knife..what a pain..."

:eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:

Remind me not to come between you and your buzzbait if I ever swim in spider lake!
My story is not so much weird as it is dumb, but here goes:
I was 19 and with the 5th Marine Regiment (infantry oohrah!). A buddy and me were debating hand to hand knife fighting styles. I stated that I preferred a blade up grip whereas he preferred blade down. His thinking was that if your opponent were to grab your wrist, you could flick the blade and get his wrist. Well, in a slow motion demo which we thought was safe, he proved his point by accidently laying my wrist open pretty badly. Ooops.

The funniest part was what came next. He rushes me to the camp clinic while I keep pressure on the cut. He runs into the emergency room and tells them "My buddy just cut his wrist!". Ha Ha, you can probably imagine the reaction by the corpsman. After much explaining they finally patched me up and sent me home with instructions to contact a counselor. :)

BTW, I now prefer knife down grip. :) :)
funny knife-related story : a few years back [mid nineties] when my father had just started making knives and was exhibiting at a local show a guy approaches the table and asks how much a certain knife mother says 850 [z a rand] and the guy tries to pay with a my mother says eight hundred and fifty.the guy goes red and leaves the show.must have been his 1st knife show.
Tom Maringer, a great sword maker designed a knife he called the Vorpal and an underarm, handle down sheath of kydex that broke out of the front of the sheath edge forward ready to use. At a blade show, in Knoxville, I think, a customer picks one up from the table and holding the sheath in the middle rips the knife forward almost removeing his fingers. LOTS of blood and excitement. bandaids would not handle it. A. G.

If it's the incident I remember... it was at a BACKA show. The guy was in surgery for several hours as tendons were repaired. He had bought the knife to use in his job as security guard but the docs said that the security work would be impossible as he had to keep the whole hand as still as possible in a cast for six months. I heard from him later. He had decided to go back to school since he could do that with one hand. He finished the degree he'd set aside years before, and by the time the hand healed (which it did nicely) he had a far better job than his old mall-cop gig. So all in all it was a major life upgrade for him. I thought about a joking brochure... "Life Improvement the Vorpal Way". ;) But really... I'm very glad it all worked out.

But all it took was one fractional second of not really thinking!
funny knife-related story : a few years back [mid nineties] when my father had just started making knives and was exhibiting at a local show a guy approaches the table and asks how much a certain knife mother says 850 [z a rand] and the guy tries to pay with a my mother says eight hundred and fifty.the guy goes red and leaves the show.must have been his 1st knife show.

I had one of those... would have been early eighties... three-day Renaissance Festival in Norman Oklahoma. One of my early swords... a cup hilt rapier. A guy comes by on Friday, spends half an hour looking at it and handling it, asks how much it was, I said "three fifty" (like I said, this was a long time ago!!). He comes back a couple more times on friday, several times on Saturday, brings his friends, asks about the steel and the other materials, goes away saying he's got to think about it some more. Sunday afternoon we're packing it in, he finally comes back and says "I'll take it!" So I start sheathing it and putting it in the cloth bag while he's reaching for his wallet. He comes out with a fin and says "Got change for a five?" Absolutely straight face... not joking. I mean... this guy had to think about it for THREE DAYS before deciding to spend (what he thought was) three and a half bucks!!!! :eek:

That was the first AND LAST time I ever displayed at a Ren Fest! :barf:
I've shared both of these stories before, but they're both good examples of not knowing what you're doing.

#1. A buddy of mine was demonstrating his prowess with knives by using the quillion on a Cold Steel TiLite to snag on his pocket (like an Emerson wave). "I can do it even faster" he said as he whipped it out; the tip went about an inch into the thigh of a lady friend behind him. He didn't even apologize and went a few feet away, then said "Well, at least I'm getting good at it".
He wasn't too popular that night, and I distinctly remember at least three people ordering him to put the knife down at gunpoint. Stupid.

#2. Another "that knife isn't sharp" story. I was reprofiling a Kershaw Leek for one of my co-workers, and handed it back to him with the notice that it's very sharp. He eyeballed it and said "It doesn't look sharp". I said "it is, be careful man".
He put the rear of the blade on his forearm and drew the knife backward, opening up a 3" long cut. Obscenities came out as fast as the blood did, and his boss was alerted that he'd be going to the hospital for stitches. Luckily, your forearms have a lot of meat in them so he didn't do any damage other than separating skin. He returned the next day and told me that I'm not allowed sharpening his knives again. I said fine.

The End.
my idiot story is something I did myself, to myself, before I even knew this place existed. a couple of years ago I got my first proper sheath knife (previously I had been borrowing my dad's old one) a mora frost clipper in carbon steel. investigating this wonderful new bit of kit (I was a kit fiend even then) I decided to test how good the "guard" on the blade was, by grabbing the bottom of the handle with my left hand, and attempting to push my right hand over the guard. :jerkit: which, of course, it did, giving me a lovely little cut right in the 1st joint of my index finger. fortuenatley it was little more than a fairly bad paper cut, but it hurt like crazy. and continued to do so for the next few days at collage, whenever I was writing something.

a story I'm slightly more proud of was from when I was a young scout (about 10 years old IRRC) one of our cub leaders had been given a present by the group, as he was leaving the group to take a district position. (although he still apears at meetings fairly regualy) part of this gift was one of the tool-logic knives with the flint and striker in the back, and a lovely, razor sharp blade. he showed a few of us this lovely shiney bit of kit, and I asked if I could have a look (definatley begining on the knife knut road here....) he handed it to me, with the express warning "DO NOT TOUCH THE BLADE, IT IS SHARP!" which I promptly ignored, and proceeded to perform the traditional sharpness test of lightly brushing my thumb across the edge, leaving a perfectly intact finger. I then returned the blade to the leader, who was now wearing a look of shock on his face, and commented, "yes, it is sharp isn't it" :D
I sharpened a knife for a former co-worker once. Upon handing it back to him and telling him it was now very sharp, he proceeded to open the blade and lick the edge... just like in the movies.

His eyes opened very wide and he vomitted because his mouth filled with blood pretty quickly.

I refused to sharpen his knives after that if that was how he was going to test my sharpening ability.
Great that this thread got bumped!

I have two stories.

First one my dad told me of myself but I cant remember. I was 4 and my dad could not find his old kershaw. those with the wood in the handle, but that specific model has been discontinued. Anyway he said after a while I came walking in. beef turkey (the meat that you dry with salt? we call it billtong here) and all my fingers cut across on both hands. He said he never got such a big scare and freaked out. I still have the marks though. Its part of my finger prints now!

The second story happened middle of last year. On the farm most people sharpen their knife still with steel. Creating a more course edge and sharpen almost flat to the primary bevel. They feel my knife and say it isnt that sharp. Brand new EXK 1 Burger that just got re polished on 1000 grit lansky stone and leather after words. I say it can shave. They laugh! they shaves and they can't believe it. Then had to explain the difference between a course edge that bites a bit more into your thumb when you test it and a well polished edge that doesn't bite that much but cuts clean and the flesh is separated almost immediately.