Embarrassing knife stories?

I can't really say if this was embarrassing or not, because nobody else ever knew about it, but it sure made me feel stupid.

Back in the '70s in junior high (now 'middle school', I guess), I started carrying a cheap switchblade stamped "rizzuto estileto Milano" in my RF pocket, along with a standard medium stockman(Schrade or Buck) in my LF pocket (for the real cutting chores). I thought that carrying a switchblade made me 'cool' because it was illegal (3" blade), and I thought of myself as 'The Man With A Switchblade'.

In reality, it was a real POS. Although its push-button opening worked fine, when closed, the tip stuck out of the handle, and there was all kinds of play in the locked-open position. One day I was sitting in class after lunch and felt a slight poking sensation in my right nut sack, but didn't think too much about it until later, when I discovered that the switchblade (despite the safety) had come partially open in my pocket, and the blade tip had been very lightly poking me in the you-know-what. In private, I checked for any damage, which thankfully there was none.

I stopped carrying that knife cold-turkey after that. So much for 'The Man With A Switchblade'; I very well could have been 'The Man With A Pierced (you-know-what)'.

Jim
 
About 5 years ago I worked in a small hospital. My job role was one that a knife was generally useful for, so I carried a Benchmade 530. I was standing in the pharmacy and reached into my pocket for a flash drive when the ledge on the thumbstud grabbed a loose thread on my sleeve, the knife lifted out and fell to the floor, half opened. Everyone turned around and looked. This was in a place where controlled substances were stored and clearance was required.

Thankfully nobody cared and I was henceforth known as Switchblade for the remainder of my employment.
 
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Bahahahahahahaha!!!!!

That one got me laughing...mainly because I have been there.

When I was in the Marines, a bunch of us (drunk of course) started talking about our massive amount of knife fighting skill we only THOUGHT we had. After a demo of kicking a knife out of someone's hand (my God how did we NOT get hurt on that one) my friend Pelham (we called him Opie) showed us that REAL knife fighters hold their knives blade down stabbin' style so no one can kick your wrist. Being a smart a$$ I slapped the top of his hand very hard...which of course fired the Gerber MK II straight down into the top of his foot. Lesson: We were NOT knife fighters.
 
Heirphoto said:
Gave my wife a Swiss Army knife so she could open packages. I was showing her the safe way to close it and cut myself as it closed.
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An SAK has nailed my more times than all other knives combined, yet I still carry a pioneer daily. The blade on it is probably the only tool I don’t use. Save that work for my para 2
 
Me and my wife have toms of love and respect for one another but we are also pranksters and sometimes live to push each other's buttons.

We actually know all the right buttons to push too. One time I went too far according to my wife and she got so pissed she threw my entire knife collection and sharpening tools in the trash.

When I got home all I could do was laugh. I did the douche move, sat next to her and proceeded to go online and order a Delica. I was waiting to get my bell rung, lol. We made up of course after I fished all of my stuff out of the trash.
 
Easy dropping the hunting knife on way to go field dress a deer. I was looking on my person for 5 minutes till my brother said to use that folder I showed him that morning.
Good thing I had a back up folder with a gut hook, there I learned a lesson to get lock back types for that sort of job.
 
Hi guys, lurked for a while and finally registered.

I remember when I was around 8 or 9 my aunt went to Ireland and brought me back a small knife with the Irish flag on the handle. My grandmother wasn't sure if I should have it but my aunt and me convinced her it would be okay. Up early on the Saturday morning and yep, sliced my thumb open, blood everywhere. Finally managed to stop it, put my thumb in my fist so they wouldn't see it once they got out of bed. When they did get up there was a scream from the bathroom I hadn't cleaned around the sink and there was blood everywhere. Knife confiscated.
 
I doesn't get more embarrassing than having defended Jared West and Quartermaster knives, except maybe for still loving their objectively horrid design aesthetic.
 
Tip up Sebenza.... talking to an employee, put my hand in my pocket, only to find the blade wasn't fully closed. Cut the holy hell out of my little finger.
 
22-rimfire said:
Anyone open a case of soft drinks (box) like Coke and slice into a can? Done that a couple times.

Or cut the little tab (price tag on plastic thingie) on say a pair of new socks only to slice a hole into your new socks? Scissors have their place.
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Guilty as charged... for BOTH situations. With the exception that I have pierced more milk bottles than pop cans.

Also, I have gotten the pocket clip of my knife tangled into the jacket or a bag or something... and fall off. Once it was in IKEA, didn't draw much attention though.

Between the pulling required to draw a Kersaw Leek (very little) and any G10 Cold Steel (Hulk strenght + shredered pocket)... there HAS to be a middle ground!

Mikel
 
wazu013 said:
cockroach-smiley-emoticon.gif
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I seriously just tried to smash that damn bug on my phone multiple times!
 
There is not an expensive knife in the world which I have not pranged or dropped. Same with anything ever held by any human hand.

My MOST embarrassing knife story would be the one I posted on the internet for the entire world to read and heckle. THOSE I can avoid.
 
RBid said:
Things get embarrassing for me every time I try to thumb a front flipper. I put on quite a demonstration of ineptitude at the Olamic table at Blade West. Busker 20, Ryan 0.
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That's because front flippers are an impractical opening method.
 
L.H.S said:
That's because front flippers are an impractical opening method.
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I think the Busker has a better design than most, in that it presents a hold angle and tab that don’t make it weird. I think my problem is that I have a quirk where I’ll instinctively hug the inside of any bend like a race car driver. That translated to the way I was trying to fire the Busker. I realized as I set it down the last time that I was literally rolling my thumb so low on the tab that I was dragging my finger against the frame.

If you just said, “well, that’s stupid”, all I can do is own it and redirect attention to the thread title.

100% user error.
 
irons said:
Hi guys, lurked for a while and finally registered.

I remember when I was around 8 or 9 my aunt went to Ireland and brought me back a small knife with the Irish flag on the handle. My grandmother wasn't sure if I should have it but my aunt and me convinced her it would be okay. Up early on the Saturday morning and yep, sliced my thumb open, blood everywhere. Finally managed to stop it, put my thumb in my fist so they wouldn't see it once they got out of bed. When they did get up there was a scream from the bathroom I hadn't cleaned around the sink and there was blood everywhere. Knife confiscated.
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That's pretty funny and I'd say typical. It is part of growing up if you use knives. We all cut ourselves from time to time whether we want to admit it or not. I have related my stupid blood dripping mishaps before in threads but the worst was at Sportsman Warehouse handling a fixed blade and somehow fumbled and dropped it.... tried to catch the thing and got cut really bad. It may have been 440A, but it sure did cut. Yes, I bought it.

Welcome to the forum Irons.
 
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